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MRSWILKI
SparkPoints: (5,284)
Fitness Minutes: (5,435)
Posts:
135
11/30/11 10:33 A
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I don't know your Grandma so I'm going to assume the best of her.
Probably she is concerned about your health, and feels that money would be a great motivator to get you healthier. Relatives can do hurtful things unknowingly or with good intentions. Especially if she has never had a weight problem she probably thinks this is a very generous offer (after all 1000 is a lot of money and she might not realize how difficult it is to lose 40 pounds).
You have to lose the weight when YOU are ready, otherwise it will never stick. However, if you are ready anyway you could get support from her. Maybe talk to her and explain that you don't like being bribed, that is insulting or hurts your feelings or whatever it is that you feel right now. But tell her that you do want to become healthier, and maybe she could instead help you get on the right track. If she was willing to hand you 1k, maybe she would be willing to help you pay for a gym membership, or a personal trainer, or some new workout clothes, or some cook books or something. Tell her that helping you get the tools you need to lose the 40 pounds will help you out much more than just giving you money at the end. Explain that it is a difficult (but doable) task and you need family support.
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ARCHIMEDESII
SparkPoints: (112,674)
Fitness Minutes: (179,200)
Posts:
17,381
11/29/11 1:18 P
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ECO... thank your grandmother for their kind offer, but let her know you're refusing because you'd rather lose weight in a healthy manner.
My aunt made a very similar offer to me when I was in high school. Told me that if I could lose 25 pounds by Christmas, she would buy me a set of skis and boots. Sounds like a great offer, doesn't it ? Just lose 25 pounds and get a pair of skis. Needless to say, I took her up on her offer.
Back then, I didn't know anything about how to lose weight in a healthy fashion. What did I do ? Stupid things like any other teenager. I starved myself and yes, I lost weight. BUT... I didn't lose 25 pounds. I think I lost 20. anyway... not good enough. so, I didn't get the skis. AND my family proceeded to tell me that had I really "wanted" those skis, I would have lost the weight. They felt I didn't work hard enough. Can't even tell you how that made me feel. All my cousins had skis and I was the poor, fat relation.
I won't say that was the incident that put my on the weight loss roller coaster, but it certainly kept me on it a while longer.
No, you do not need a bribe to be healthy. You can do this on your on !!
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LIMONADE34
Posts:
923
11/29/11 12:47 P
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I am sorry to hear you are getting pressured by your family to lose weight. I agree that you should sit down with your grandmother and explain to her that bribing and nagging you to lose weight isn't going to make it suddenly happen, and is in fact detrimental to your efforts. You should be making changes for yourself, not for some old bat with nothing better to do than badger her grandchild. It may be difficult for you to get the message across to her, but try your best to ignore her and don't let it get to you if she continues to harass you about it. Talk to a friend, go for a walk, or get on Spark when you feel like you need support! Walk out of the room as soon as she opens her mouth if need be; you leaving isn't rude, but her haranguing you is. Stay strong and come here for support when you need it! 
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BRITOMART
Posts:
6,644
11/29/11 9:20 A
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Ignore the 'bribe' as you call it, lose the weight. If she wants to give you a 'present' after you've lost what you wanted to lose anyway, it's serendipity, and not control. She can't pay you to lose weight (something my company's insurance company hasn't gotten figured out yet by the way) but if she wants to give you money, use it as an extra, spontaneous costs-me-nothing reward.
You have to do the work, and that means finding your own motivation. Everything else is, ultimately, distraction--or excuse. Don't let your grandmother become either, especially don't let her become your excuse for not losing.
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SP_COACH_NANCY
SparkPoints: (158,833)
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46,222
11/29/11 8:26 A
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