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COSMOANGEL SparkPoints: (7,920)
Fitness Minutes: (21,886)
Posts: 51
11/30/12 4:58 P

I'm sorry that happened to you. I'm not fond of kids either....that's why I stopped going to our Y, and joined an adult only place. Truthfully, I find kids bratty, annoying and self indulged. ...I know that may sound mean of me, honestly I'm a really nice person lol. I just know kids are not my thing. I once was working in an art studio, renting time there, and a mom comes in with her little kid, and had the kid sit next to me while I was melting glass with a duel fuel torch...like I was some entertainment or something. She was totally clueless as to the danger of a kid sitting infront of a torch. As I was justing renting the equipment, I did not think it was my responsibility to do a safety briefing. The kid turned to me and said "you're kind of fat". It was in total earshot of her mom and the mom did not do anything. I was absolutely shattered, here I was trying to do something positive for myself so I could feel good about myself and this happens. I turned to the kid and said you are being rude, then I told the mom that the kid was in danger of being blinded by the flare or flying shards of glass. Some parents just don't get that they are raising monsters. So I know how you feel. One thing I do remember about the Y is that they had a clearly stated set of values, which was about respecting everyone. I would see if your Y has a simillar mission statement or set of core values and I would send an e-mail outlining what happened and how the kids actions made you feel to the Director. At minimum , that might give you a sense of power or healing, and the Director might be able to use it for training her staff, But I also want to say good for you for getting out there and on the equipment. You Rock!!!! It's very brave to take a step forward, and I am sure in no time, using all the equipment will be old hat for you. Please don't be discouraged by the bad experience....there will be many positive ones as you move forward on your journey.

JSTBECUZ99 Posts: 81
11/29/12 2:38 P

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LITTLE1DER Posts: 934
11/29/12 2:12 P

I think you should make a call to the Y, ask for the manager, you don't have to give them your name just tell them you are a new member and let them know what happened on your first visit. If you can just do it in a way that is diplomatic let them know that you felt uncomfortable. I think you should also call or ask at the desk to have a introduction to the gym equipment, it usually takes 15 to 20 minutes, one of the staff takes you to the different machines and shows you how to adjust it, some places give you a sheet of paper to record your settings and even track your progress. You are not expected to know how to adjust machines you've never used and you want to make sure you are comfortable and safe from injury when you use them.
I also want you to know I've been in your shoes kids are mean but it was negligent of the person who was supposed to be watching them. I'm proud of you for getting 20 minutes in and I am inspired by you to go to the gym tonight!
Keep being you and doing what you need to do!

A-NEW-NURSE Posts: 69
11/28/12 10:34 P

Kids are mean and cruel if we let them be mean and cruel. Those kids were being brats and felt empowered because they were in a group. (Mob mentality starts young) I am appalled that their supervisor did nothing to ream them out because that is unacceptable behaviour.

I am so sorry that happened to you. It sounds like every large lady's nightmare! I always feel like people are looking at me in the gym but never have I been pointed and laughed at.

I can't imagine that will happen again but if it does I would ream those kids out. People need to stop being so afraid to discipline (verbally) other people's kids. Kids will not learn community respect otherwise.

Hang in there, and show those little turds what you are made of!

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SIMPLELIFE2 Posts: 707
11/28/12 8:39 P

That's awesome you made it to they gym and then stuck it out. That's a huge step! Don't let one awkward experience stop you. Just keep going. It will get easier. Really.

I'm surprised they don't have a better orientation for new members. Please inquire at the desk about getting a tour of the equipment. Maybe focus on a few pieces at a time so your aren't overwhelmed. If you are new to exercise, a month or so with a personal trainer would pay huge dividends.

It really is important to get the proper settings on the equipment. At best, you won't get the most benefit. At worst, you could end up with an injury. You are right about the equipment being sized for taller people, particularly weight machines, but you should be able to set the cardio equipment properly. It just might feel awkward because it is new to you. That's why consulting a staff member would be helpful. I'm only 5'2" and I have a really hard time with the lat pulldown and preacher curl. As you advance, free weights are preferable anyway.

If that ever happens again with the kids, I would definitely bring it up to management. Kids are mean and cruel. I would hope that the adults just weren't paying attention. If this happened to you, I'm sure it has happened to others. Speak up. Just think, you are improving yourself. They may stay mean and bratty. Who is really better off?

My favorite Eleanor Roosevelt quote for moments like that is "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." So, when are you going back?

STARDUST2K4 Posts: 1,346
11/28/12 4:03 P

I really appreciate that you shared your story. I don't like kids either (though I've found that about 80% of the time, terrible children come from terrible parents) so I can't even imagine how pi$$ed off that would have made me. Don't give up! If those little brats want a show, just give it to them. Maybe even next time wave? I'm sure when half of them become over weight themselves, they'll remember laughing at you and feel as terrible as they made you feel.

You can do it! Just remember that people are going to say things. I've been hollered at, laughed at, and just plain stared at. I remind myself that every time those people see me, I'm going to be a little bit skinnier and a whole lot better off than they.

LOVEXAVIE SparkPoints: (30,412)
Fitness Minutes: (30,431)
Posts: 2,033
11/27/12 9:53 P

The adult with those kids really missed a pivotable, teachable moment.
Sometimes these moments come up when parents aren't around to intervene and lets face it, some parents fail to teach.

If I had been there, whether or not I was leading the kids around, you can bet I would have informed the adult (if he was that oblivious) and used that moment to teach the kids about being kind.

After that, I'd point out that you were a great example of someone working for a positive benefit, and would they like someone to laugh at them if they were working on improving something about themselves??


I'm sorry this happened to you but you just continue on your way. Do not let a bunch of baby knuckleheads diminish your spark!!

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Edited by: LOVEXAVIE at: 11/27/2012 (21:55)
SLIMMERKIWI SparkPoints: (138,262)
Fitness Minutes: (33,254)
Posts: 21,854
11/27/12 9:16 P

It sounds like the adult with the children wasn't really paying attention to them or noticing their rudeness.

My suggestion when you next go to the gym, ask a staff member to show you how to set the equipment up for you, and ensure that you know how to use it properly - SAFELY - to prevent injury.

Good for you for getting there. I went in one a couple times to ask questions not to exercise. I couldn't get out past enough. Everything was jam-packed close together and I felt really claustrophobic - my heart started racing and it affected my breathing, etc.

Kris

FOUREYEDFOOL SparkPoints: (2,439)
Fitness Minutes: (1,013)
Posts: 81
11/27/12 9:02 P

So, today was my first day at the YMCA gym. I was super stoked--still am, even though it was incredibly awkward. I went to the gym and, after looking around like I knew what the hell I was doing, found the workout room. It was much smaller than I expected, but, the YMCA by my house is a smaller one. Cardio machines in the front of the room, weight machines in the back. There was only two other people there--two elderly men, one lifting weights and one RUNNING on the treadmill. He moved faster than any old man I've ever seen in my life.

I decided to start with the elliptical. I picked the one at the very front and off to the side. It was either that or exercise right next to or in front of the man, and I didn't want to do either. So, I awkwardly lug my 300-pound body onto the machine and begin.

It was a little shaky at first...I'm only 5'4, and I think these machines are mostly made for people a little taller, and I had not a clue of how to adjust it, so I decided to just wing it. I was planning to do 10 minutes on the elliptical, 10 minutes on the treadmill, and 15 on the bike.

About a minute in, this adult comes out with a bunch of kids--I assume he was a leader for one of the YMCA's daycare programs. Cool. I could see them because they were all huddled around the front counter. The way the workout room is set up, there is a huge window in the front wall that you can see through and anyone outside can see into, although most of it is covered up with posters.

Well, I wasn't. Within another minute, this little girl was watching me. Laughing. Then, she gets another little girl's attention. I think, oh, good, she's done. Nope.

Then, she points at me, and they both start looking at me and laughing.

Then, they get the attention of a THIRD little girl. Before I know it, I had 5 little girls looking at me, watching me, and laughing. The adult with them was RIGHT THERE talking to someone at the counter. I can't believe that he didn't hear them: "Hey look at her" or "look at him" (my hair is really short and I have mens glasses, so, to be honest, I get called both...I have big breasts though, so it's kind of like I'm half-and-half lol).

Anyway, I find it hard to believe that he didn't hear them or notice them staring at me and say, "Girls, stop it, that's not polite." Nothing. They sat there and stared and laughed and pointed the entire ten minutes I was working out.

I don't like kids. I never have. I don't want kids, they're just not for me. And I know it's ridiculous that I was so humiliated and got my feelings so hurt by a bunch of children, but that's just how I am. URGH.

Anyway. The next thing I did was ride the bike. Again, I couldn't seem to get it set right for my height, so every time I pedaled, the pedals under my feet went CLUNK and the whole machine seemed to jolt. I hard the hardest time getting on and off, heaving my huge leg over to the other side. But, okay. I did it for 10 minutes.

The treadmills were still just in too much of an awkward spot for me to feel really comfortable with, so I tried the recumbent bike. This was even worse than the regular bike in terms of adjusting it. My legs were either pressed up against my chest or they were so stretched out I could hardly pedal.

So, I did 20 minutes of exercise and left. Sigh. I think I'll go a little later tomorrow to avoid those kids.

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