I've been through a similar situation with my own family. Let me tell you a story from my own childhood. When I was a teenager, an aunt of mine (for incentive) told me she would buy me a set of skis and boots for Christmas IF I could lose 20 or 25 pounds. It was one or the other. For several weeks I starved myself trying to lose that 20 pounds and get those skis. That's what person did back then to lose weight, wasn't it ? Just stop eating and you'll lose ?
Well, flash forward to Christmas. Did I lose the weight ? Not quite. I lost about 17-18 pounds. Which wasn't good enough. What did my aunt say,"If you really wanted those skis, you would have tried harder". Can't tell you how many times I've heard in my life that if you just tried harder, you'd lose weight. Work harder to get that A because the B isn't good enough.
That's not how losing weight works. What that episode eventually caused me to do was yo yo diet for many years. Here's what I've learned since then.
You CAN'T please your family ! It's impossible. If you want to lose weight, it has to be for YOUR own reasons, not theirs. this is YOUR body. You're making decisions that impact YOUR health. That's why you can't listen to these people. They think they mean well, but not really. they think that criticising will "help" you to lose. ditto, not really.
You really do have to stop listening to these toxic voices. because they aren't healthy.
Let me ask you this, why do YOU want to lose weight ? What are your reasons ? Those aren't easy questions. But, once you can answer them, that's the motivation to help you learn healthier habits for life.
Remember, you're trying to change habits learned over a life time. That's not going to happen overnight, a week, a month or even a year. Change takes time. You can't put your body on a time table. It would be nice if everyone lost weight the way they do on the Biggest Loser, but that's just not typical. Weight loss really is a slow steady process that takes time. Not only do you have to change your body, with time, you need to change your head too.
If you need support, the SP community will support you if you aren't getting the support you need from your family. Don't listen to their criticisms. Lose weight for your own reasons. because once again, you'll never make them happy. people like this will find other things to criticize. My aunt was that way. Let me tell you, it took years for our relationship to become civil.
Edited by: ARCHIMEDESII at: 1/7/2013 (11:37)