When is the last time you went to the doctor ? If you haven't had a physical in a long time and you've been throwing up your meals, the best place to start is your doctor. Talk to them about what you've been feeling. Your doctor can refer you to a good therapist who specializes in eating disorders. Throwing up your meals because you feel guilty is bulimia.
You've recognized that you have a problem. That's an important first step to recovering your health. The second step is heading to the doctor. They can get you the help you need to stop feeling the way you do about your body.
You're at risk for a number of medical issues if you continue to throw up. You can recover your health, but you can't do it on your own. Seek professional help ASAP ! If you're afraid to go to the doctor, ask a loved one or family member to go with you.
You are not a bad person because you have these feelings.