I've always thought learning to fall asleep on your own without aid is important and took care of this with my only child at a younger age, but even now he does give me some trouble.
Have you thought about weaning her off of you and your husband? Maybe be in the room say 10 minutes, but no talking, no touching (of course after storytime and kisses and hugs) and just decreasing the time over a few days? My son went cold turkey, it was hard week but worth it.
He tells me now he isn't tired (he's 8), but he still goes to bed, normal routine. He reads on his own for a bit and then I will hear "good night mom" after about 10 minutes. Sometimes I think they need to decide and fight being controlled.