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MOM NEEDS SOME HELP BEFORE MY HUSBAND LEAVES ME



 
 
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UNRAVELINGOLIVE
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8/12/11 11:05 A

I'm not trying to be funny, but is the original poster an internet troll? I mean, all caps and the whole 10 pound gain and fear her husband will leave? If not, then the 'for better or worse' thing that you all said at the alter was _really_ not understood.



WHITNEYPOWER
Posts: 2
8/11/11 2:49 P

I understand wanting to look good for your man and be healthy for yourself, but if you are actually afraid he'd LEAVE YOU over your weight, there's a problem. If you feel confident about your weight, you'll act confident and confidence is attractive. Get to where you feel good about yourself and your hubby should respond. If he doesn't, you both need help beyond weight loss. emoticon



BEHAPPY0201
Posts: 619
8/11/11 12:28 P

Honey - if your husband was unhappy with you at 105 pounds then your weight is mainly his problem. I'm sure you want to loose the baby weight to feel good about yourself and be able to comfortably play with your new bundle as they grow, but really unless you are a "little person" 105 is probably more than reasonable.
Please get some counselling before he makes your weight problem and issue with the baby as well.



MUMMYUK2
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8/10/11 9:08 A

Lose the spouse and start loving yourself for who you are and the fact that you are a wonderful person.

If you stay in a marriage where the spouse will leave over a few lbs just think about what you are teaching your daughter emoticon



SUGARPIE54
Posts: 312
8/9/11 9:49 P

Your husband sounds that a real jerk in the past ten years I ballooned to around 295 a knee replacement in 2007 and ovarian cancer in 2009 and my husband is still here You have to stand up to your husband and ask him what is wrong it could be your imagination that he wants to leave ps try weight watchers I'm down 22 lbs in 16 weeks and I can't exercise because of my back emoticon



XIUXIE
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8/9/11 7:44 P

It sounds like you need to lose that husband rather than losing weight.



SUECHRIS50
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8/7/11 5:19 P

Maybe you need to come back and explain!I'm confused.Did your hasband say anything to make you think he would leave?If he has'nt and it is your thoughts,you really need to reach inside yourself and start loving you more.This is all about being in the right place in your mind! If your husband has said such a thing to you?You dont need that crap...really?145?



BUTTERFLYMOMMA2
Posts: 42
8/6/11 8:00 A

I was 101 and only 5 foot tall before i got pregnant with my first child and gained 60lbs with that pregnacy. I managed to get back down to 115 with a lot of exercise and unhealth eating (or not eating). Even at that height and weight I was unhealthy looking. I have now learned after 4 children and only being able to get back down to 125 that you need to love yourself and not what a man thinks to really stop stressing about your weight. I look good at 125 and no less. I am thankful my husband never tells me I'm fat. He just says that I'm his and that is all that matters. I am still working on the weight since the 4th child and it just takes time and a positive additude. You are not overweight and are beautiful just the you are. If he loves you he won't leave you over a little thing like weight.



IRISHJEEPGIRL
Posts: 42
8/3/11 8:04 A

The equation for losing weight is simple-eat right, drink water, exercise. I can, however, recommend a quick way to lose anywhere from 170-250 pounds. (Divorce.)

Has he said that you must lose weight? You posted that he was not pleased with you at 105.Please elaborate! Did he consider you too thin or too heavy? Either way, honey, this cat has some serious problems. If he is going to leave you because of your weight, then you would perhaps be better off without him. In the end, your body is just the hull that allows you to walk around on earth. It has very little to do with what makes you lovable and desirable.

If you want to lose weight for your own well being and satisfaction, then the above formula is the way to go. If you are being forced into this by fears of losing a man, then I would say let his butt go. There's men out there who will love you for YOU.





CRACKERJACK2825
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8/3/11 1:50 A

I'm not sure of the situation, but it sounds to me like you need to walk up to your husband, poke him in the chest with your finger, and say this:

"Listen here, buddy. I gave birth to YOUR child. If I gained a little weight doing it, so what? I'm not fat, gross, repulsive or disgusting by any means. I am a BEAUTIFUL, STRONG, CONFIDENT woman, and I love myself for me. You ain't exactly the Don Juan I remember marrying. You got a problem? There's the door."

But I'm grumpy by nature and would tell my husband that in a heartbeat. :) But everybody is right. You HAVE to want to do this for YOU. I was never really interested in losing weight and getting in shape until December of 2010, but once I got interested for MYSELF, I was like a whirlwind. If you need someone to talk to, I'll be there for you. I've been there, sweetie.



MJREIMERS
Posts: 3,741
8/2/11 9:50 P

It sounds like there's more happening here than just your weight. I gained anywhere from 45 to 65 lbs with each of my four kids. One month I gained 18 lbs with my first child so your gain is completely normal and I would have loved to have only gained what you did.

Have you spoken to your husband directly? Maybe couple counseling may help. It's a tough time with a little one and the hormones still being a little out of whack.

However, another person posted you need to lose weight for you and that's right. Besides, you are beautiful already!

I hope everything turns out ok. emoticon



BURNINGEMBER
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8/2/11 7:50 P

How tall are you? Is your prepreg weight a healthy and realistic goal for you now? I weighed 110 at one time but it was an unhealthy weight for me at 5'6 I looked emaciated.



CRENTERIA1
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8/2/11 7:05 P

I was 105 pounds when i got pregnant and i guess i just let myself go. he didnt like the weight i was at before thats why i was on a diet but i gained all my weight plus some.



BGBEAR624
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8/2/11 1:55 P

Hi there,
I'm not sure what the situation is with your husband, but first and foremost you must understand that the only way you are going to be successful is if YOU want to do this. I'm not sure how tall you are, but staying in the range of 135-145 sounds relatively healthy to me.

However, if YOU really want to lose weight, you can do it!!! You can put in the work and the effort and make your dream a reality. BUT if you are trying to fit into some ideal that your husband has in his head, then you will find it a difficult uphill climb I'm afraid.

Take some time to decide why you really want to do this. If you take your husband's thoughts out of the equation, are YOU happy with yourself the way you are?

Best of luck to you on your journey....


emoticon
Brenda



PRIMALMICHAEL
Posts: 3,846
8/2/11 1:51 P

Do I understand your post correctly? You started at 142 and are now at 145 - a net gain of 3 pounds - and you believe that your husband might leave you because of your weight gain.

Is this correct?

Has he actually told you or implied that he might leave, or is it something that you are concerned he might think about in the future?



CRENTERIA1
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Posts: 4
8/2/11 12:26 P

HI I AM A STAY AT HOME MOM WITH A 3 YR OLD DAUGHTER AND I NEED SOME HELP. IT SEEMS LIKE THE MORE I TRY TO LOSE WEIGHT THE MORE I GAIN. I STARTED OUT AT 142 GOT DOWN TO 135 AND NOW IM 145. I NEED SOME HELP SOME IDEAS ANYTHING TO HELP IF I DONT DO SOMETHING SOON I THINK MY HUSBAND MIGHT LEAVE. IM TIRED OF IT TOO. I REALLY NEED SOME HELP



 
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