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CIARANICOLE85 SparkPoints: (18,397)
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Posts: 749
11/29/11 1:37 P

I have a cousin that is getting married in January. I was engaged long before her and this is my first this is her 3rd. I am happy for her don't get me wrong but the thing that has me a little bummed is that her wedding is before mine. (She'll have been engaged a total of 4 months) I have been engaged for nearly 9 months and I am not able to have a wedding until probably next October. We do not have the money to plan one so soon. And her family and fiance both have the cash to throw towards the wedding. I just know mine will be so small compared to hers and I feel like my thunder has been stolen as the girl that's getting married in our family. lol

I'm over it now but at first I felt like she was trying to compete with me.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,283
10/18/11 8:58 P

That would be a bummer if someone getting married around the same time was trying to outdo what you were doing. Especially if they have a larger budget and let you know it.

I would keep a lot of the wedding planning a secret. Especially if they have a tendency to borrow other peoples ideas. When they ask, say it is coming along nicely and if they press you. Ask for a wedding free night.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 10/18/2011 (20:59)
10/16/11 5:08 P

It's all going to depend on your attitude. If they want to out-do your wedding, just let them. If you have a wedding that is wholly authentic to who you are your partner are, then it won't matter what other people are doing. I've been to a lot of weddings and to be honest, I can't remember what the bridesmaids were wearing, the food that was served, the favors, the flowers, etc. Even for weddings that I was in (alright, I remember the bridesmaid dresses for those). What everyone remembers is the tone of the wedding (was it fun?) and how totally in love the bride and groom were. It's frustrating when someone copies your idea before you get to use it. But really I guess everything's been done before, so if it makes sense in your wedding, go ahead and do it and forget about everything else.

SCTK519 Posts: 2,086
10/12/11 12:01 P

Absolutely! My brother got married 6 months to the day before I did and we hardly talked about it. You can talk about wedding planning without talking about specifics and there's a lot more in life to talk about besides a wedding. I treated it sort of like talking with coworkers you're not going to invite; I didn't want to not answer questions, but I also want to be vague and not go overboard with telling them every detail that they won't see & don't care about. Or if there's certain things you're really excited you planned but don't want anyone to "steal", so to speak, tell them it's a surprise.

ARKERLIN Posts: 88
10/12/11 7:35 A

Do you really think thats realistic?

SCTK519 Posts: 2,086
10/11/11 8:12 P

Just don't talk about your weddings with each other. If people ask how planning is going, tell them it's going well and leave it at that.

ARKERLIN Posts: 88
10/11/11 9:47 A

My best friend is getting married 5 months before I am and it seems like we unintentionally compare everything.

My fiance's brother is getting married the weekend before we are and that has turned into an all out battle.

Any suggestions on how to ignore the pressue to "out-do" someone else's wedding?

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