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SLIMMERKIWI Posts: 26,156
5/29/13 5:41 A

My husband had a number of very serious health issues - each of which could be fatal. He used to get quite mad at me because I would have to remind him more often than not to take his medication. He had 18 tablets to take in the morning alone. What it boiled down to was altho' I would remind him, he was responsible for his own actions, and that included with his health. There were times I had to stand back. Because I understood that he was responsible for his actions, I also understood that should he die because of his blase attitude, it was ultimately HIS choice. He had been told after his first heart attack that the sole reason for it was his very heavy smoking. All other markers were good - BP, Cholesterol, weight, fitness, diet (with the exception of heavy alcohol.) I did what I could, and that was provide very healthy meals. He died last year, aged 59, while having his 4th heart attack. He had understood that his choices increased his risk, and we both understood that I couldn't be responsible for his actions.

I hope that you find it in you to be able to take a deep breath at those frustrating times - because that will ultimately help YOU through this!

BIG hugs,

COANNIE SparkPoints: (9,512)
Fitness Minutes: (9,064)
Posts: 241
5/28/13 6:51 P

Aerithwolf, I am sorry to hear about your husband's BP. It is very difficult when someone you love won't do what is needed to protect their health, I know that feeling all too well. I am so glad you went to the gym, that is a very healthy choice! Good on you! Something that occurs to me is that in seeing you taking care of yourself, it may cause him to want to help himself as well. Best wishes to you both.

5/28/13 3:23 P

After post last night I when to the gym and workout. I found current weight. that help a lot. I have face I can't make him change but I can try help to be better. he problem he willn't take his meds that his b p was up. it was just one time in this week that I found bp 205/160 and wounder why feeling bad. It hard see him dieing inside slowly.. I try get do right for year I tried trying. I have take myself frist every other follow suit I guess. I have touble put myself frist. thank everything guys!

LOVEXAVIE SparkPoints: (42,597)
Fitness Minutes: (48,071)
Posts: 2,443
5/28/13 2:56 P

"This, too, shall pass."

Please don't give up. I'm so sorry you are having a rough time right now.
We need you with us - you can get & give inspiration here - so please don't give up!

LAURA_LYNN SparkPoints: (17,940)
Fitness Minutes: (7,011)
Posts: 616
5/28/13 2:11 P

By reaching out your hand on these message boards, you are grabbing onto hope. It may seem very dark, but there is hope and you grabbed onto it. Good job! Keep reaching out your hand here and I hope it helps you pull up out of the darkness! Keep coming back!

BETHS60 Posts: 565
5/28/13 9:58 A

So sorry you are having such a hard time.

I have a simple test for whether or not it is time to give up. Take your pulse for 10 seconds. If the number is more than zero, then it is not time to give up. It is not time to give up on yourself. I can't promise you that things will get better, but I can promise you that things will change. And when things are really bad, chances are good that some of those changes will make things better.

It's really hard when your life seems to be crashing in around you, and all you want to do is crawl into bed and wait for the dark world to go away.

Take a little time to take care of yourself, if you can. Do some yoga or meditation. Make some green tea. Drink some water. Feed yourself some healthy food. Go for a walk. Call a friend. Call a therapist. Volunteer to help someone less fortunate.

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (191,675)
Fitness Minutes: (285,013)
Posts: 26,582
5/28/13 5:40 A

Hi, Melody !

I know things can seem overwhelming when you have a fight with your husband. But don't beat yourself up over it.

Do you have high blood pressure ? Yes, stress can cause a person's blood pressure to shoot through the roof. So, if you are taking medication, you want to keep taking it. However, if you do your best to eat more healthfully and get some regular exercise, you CAN get off the medication. Many SP members will tell you how they went off various medications just by changing their diet and getting some exercise.

Do you have your doctor's okay to start exercising ? If so, start with something simple. You don't have to do a lot to start exercising, start with a daily walk. Walking is not only great cardiovascular exercise, it's a great way to reduce stress. So, when you have an argument with your hubby, don't turn to the refrigerator, take a walk.

SLIMMERKIWI Posts: 26,156
5/28/13 1:54 A

I don't quite understand..... was it a 'fight' with your husband, or was it 'a fright' finding your husband's blood pressure very high? IF it was the blood pressure, then perhaps he needs to see his Dr again, and have a proper check, and also to encourage him to remember to take his medications when they need to be taken, and to adhere to a healthy lifestyle - nutrition and if possible, exercise.

BIG hugs,

Edited by: SLIMMERKIWI at: 5/28/2013 (01:56)
SWANATOPIA Posts: 1,049
5/28/13 1:21 A

Hi Melody! Sorry to hear that you and husband had a fight. Fighting always brings on emotional stress for me. One way I like to handle stress is by keeping a journal. You have made such a great decision on wanting to lose weight and being healthy as your priority in life. I am so proud of you. I know that once you get going with this new, healthier lifestyle, you are going to feel fantastic and be proud of yourself.

5/28/13 12:47 A

Today my husband had a fight in way. I tell take med after found blood plessure though the roof. Then I start thinking I needed and want in life. one weigh I need lost, eat healthly/ workout. I feel like die inside. I want gave up throw my hand up just die.

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