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I stink at dieting!



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LILLEAN
Posts: 812
6/10/13 7:03 P

If you stink at dieting then don't. Think of it more as a healthy lifestyle you're living. If you start "dieting" most likely you will stop dieting. Best advice don't diet start living healthily.



ICEANGEL0531
Posts: 1,858
6/10/13 6:53 P

I don't see weight loss as dieting, I am changing my bad eating habits for good ones.



LDHAWKE
SparkPoints: (19,069)
Fitness Minutes: (1,818)
Posts: 771
6/10/13 6:41 P

Yes, diets do stink and I stink at them too. That's why I no longer think of myself on a diet. I am now on a life changing program that will train me how to eat like a healthy person.



KASIMA52
SparkPoints: (463)
Fitness Minutes: (430)
Posts: 58
6/10/13 12:41 P

Well bless your hearts.



OLGA18
SparkPoints: (8,173)
Fitness Minutes: (3,522)
Posts: 511
6/10/13 12:19 P

Susan_Foster. I, of course, understand that. But there is a difference between offering advice and lecturing someone. Nobody wants to be lectured.



SIMONEKP
Posts: 2,463
6/10/13 12:02 P

Have you tried working with a nutritionist?



KCLARK89
SparkPoints: (23,926)
Fitness Minutes: (12,584)
Posts: 1,053
6/10/13 11:28 A

After reading through these posts, I see a lot of "tough love" which, some people take as "harsh criticism" and someone berating them. But honestly, it is what ALL of us need sometimes. We're human. We live in an oblivion bubble about certain things in ALL of our lives! Then when someone makes a comment about how it is unhealthy, whether it be food, a habit, relationship, what have you, we get defensive. That's nature.

I tried the tough love approach with one of my roommates in college over healthy eating and living and it just blew up. She knew what she needed to do, but she just didn't want to do it and even though what I was saying was true, she didn't want to admit it. I wasn't attacking her or giving her an ultimatum, I was just telling her what everyone else was afraid to.

Sometimes through this, we need to get past our own ego and genuinely listen to others who have been there or are at the same point we are and not take it as a personal attack against us, but rather as a teaching and learning opportunity.



TONKA14
Posts: 4,947
6/10/13 11:24 A

What members are trying to offer is that many people who "diet" to lose weight quickly fail and they have found that the key to their success is in learning a new healthy living approach. Thanks to the OP for sharing some of your background so we can understand where you are coming from. We can certainly be understanding of where you are coming from and hopefully you can be understanding of where people are trying to help you arrive and that is to successfully reach your goal FOREVER.

Creating a healthy lifestyle starts with the mind especially when food is comfort for life issues. SparkPeople's Mind Over Body plan is designed to give you the tools you need to identify, work through, and overcome the most common emotional and mental (attitude) problems that people face when they set out to change their lifestyles. This might be a helpful place for you to start. www.sparkpeople.com/resource/mind_over_bod
y_fat.asp


As far as your original question regarding breakdown of carbs/fats/protein -- yes, your plan outlines that for you. Based on years of research that examined the relationship between nutrient intake and disease prevention, generally-accepted ranges have been established for carbohydrates, fat and protein intake. The SparkDiet takes a middle-of-the-road approach with these ranges. Our specific breakdown is approximately 50% carbohydrates, 30% fat and 20% protein, all of which fall into the healthy ranges. You can learn more and find specifics in this article. www.sparkpeople.com/resource/nutrition_art
icles.asp?id=372


You will find those ranges for your specific program listed on your MY NUTRITION page as well. If you are trying to follow more a vegetarian eating plan, it is very important to key in on your protein intake as well. This article can help with ideas.

How to Meet Your Protein Needs without Meat
A Guide to Vegetarian Protein Sources
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/nutrition_art
icles.asp?id=158&page=2


It is important to be sure you are getting all the key nutrients necessary with a vegetarian diet as well. This article will provide more about that.

7 Key Nutrients Vegetarians Need to Watch
Vegetarian or Vegan? Make Sure These are Part of Your Diet
www.sparkpeople.com/resource/nutrition_art
icles.asp?id=1530


Hope that helps with some supporting info to help you make your meal plan healthy and work for you.

Coach Tanya







SUSAN_FOSTER
Posts: 1,228
6/10/13 11:19 A

Olga - this is a support site, but support is not blindly agreeing with someone. Support is honesty, even when it's not what a person wants to hear.

At the OPs weight, trying to lose the weight at the rate she wants to is not healthy and very likely unsustainable. We're trying to encourage her to make long term changes so she doesn't have to face trying to lose the weight over and over in a neverending cycle.



OLGA18
SparkPoints: (8,173)
Fitness Minutes: (3,522)
Posts: 511
6/10/13 10:39 A

I agree with KASIMA that there is a difference between helpful suggestions and someone telling you what you should or shouldn't want and what will or will not work for you. I have seen it happen here myself.
Every person is an individual and this is supposed to be a support site, not a place where people get castigated because one doesn't agree with their way.



DRAGONCHILDE
SparkPoints: (56,306)
Fitness Minutes: (14,204)
Posts: 9,583
6/10/13 10:15 A

KASIMA52, before you read this, I want you to understand this is coming from a place of caring. No one here has been harsh; we've been honest! We care about you, and we WANT you to succeed. I know that's a weird thing for a stranger to say, but that's what Sparkpeople is ALL ABOUT. That's what this community is for. We want people to be healthy, live healthy, and be happy.

"1) Everyone is different. Some people need to see quick results, or they have no incentive to continue. It's how their brains are wired. I can't change that. 1 lb. a week is too slow for me -- period. I'm not going to take almost a year to take off this weight, even if I have to starve myself and exercise myself to death. You need to accept that about me, and not be so judgmental. We all have our own ways of doing things to get the results we NEED to get."

Yes, everyone is different, but your need to see quick results will not be matched by your body's ability to do so. You're simply not fat enough! If you were over 300 lbs, 3 lbs a week is absolutely doable, and SAFE.

Think of it like a pool. Ever drained one? The first half comes out REALLY, REALLY fast. That's because there's so much water, that it can! However, the last quarter takes forever, because there's just nothing there to push it out any faster. You can't fight biology, and starving yourself won't make the process faster. It will actually sabotage you, because your body has mechanisms in place to protect you from this kind of thing. It's colloquially known as "starvation mode" and what it means is that the more you cut your intake and boost your exercise, the slower your metabolism will run, until in crisis mode, it will eat anything BUT your fat to survive. Muscles, organ tissue, etc.

Starvation is not okay, and neither I nor anyone here will accept that from you, because we don't want you to hurt yourself. No one will judge you, we are *afraid* for you. Those are thought patterns that lead to eating disorders.

"2) What I meant about packing in food to get to 1200 calories is that I have been eating a lot of high-calorie crap, so 1200 calories is nothing. Eating nothing but vegetables is going to make it necessary to eat a lot more. Ask any vegan how much they have to eat to get their daily calories (I have done that). "

Why on earth would you be eating nothing but vegetables? You need a balanced diet to meet your nutritional needs. Eating nothing but vegetables will leave your body unbalanced and lacking key nutrients. Vegans walk a tough line sometimes, and have to find careful ways to meet all their needs. They don't just eat salads all the time!

You need protein, healthy fats, and carbohydrates to function. Sparkpeople isn't about never eating anything but vegetables. Period. It's about balanced, healthy lifestyles for LIFE. Not quick-fix dieting.

"3) Please don't judge me and try to push your way of doing things on me. I'm glad you have all had success, but you will just run me off, and I will fail if you are harsh and go the "my way or the highway" route. I was an abused child. I run away from people who berate me and tell me I'm wrong and I have to do it their way to succeed. And I hide in food, so if you can't say something kindly, just keep your opinions to yourself, o.k.?"

Sweetie, no one is judging you. Period. I know most of these people, if not personally, pretty darn close. We've been around here for years. This isn't "my way or the highway". This is about basic biology.

Can you lose 3 lbs per week?

Your body will tell you no. You don't have enough to lose. It took you time to gain the weight, and it will take you time to lose it. Honestly, if you can't accept that, it may not be the right time for you to lose weight. You have to have your head in the game, and if it's not, you will end up doing as so many people have before, and you'll disappear and not make your goals. We don't want that. We want you to stay, we want you to succeed... but we don't want you taking dangerous steps.

I ask you this:

How well has the "get thin quick" method worked for you in the past?

This isn't a zero-sum game. If you come here, we will support you, give you the answers you need (not the ones you want) based on solid, scientific evidence. We won't sell you supplements, tell you about the latest-greatest diet fad, we won't spoon feed you "you can do what you want, really!" nonsense. Why? Because it works. This site has hundreds of THOUSANDS of success stories.

Don't you want to be one of them?

I've been on the slowest loser train. Not on purpose, mind you; I'd love to be done. Honestly, I was supposed to be at my goal weight by now. Why am I not there? Because I'm not perfect. I fall. I pick myself up. I lose motivation.

But I keep coming back. I talk about the stinky parts. I understand that even if I *never lose another pound* I will NEVER go back to the way I was a year ago. I am healthier, happier, and fitter than I EVER have been in my life.

And I would never give that up for a 6 lb weight loss tomorrow.

No thanks.

If you take nothing out of this long-winded message I've just written, at least take this home with you. You need to go see a medical professional, and explain your goals, and get real, tailored guidance. If you can, a registered dietician is even MORE valuable, as they can design an eating plan that is going to meet your nutritional needs without deprivation, and provide you guidance based on your body and its abilities. Neither will (if they're worth their degrees) try to spoon-feed you get-thin-quick schemes.

In the end, we're just fellow Sparkpeople, and given your mental blocks and motivation, you may need more support than we can provide. But know that we're here for you, we love you, and we WANT you to be here.

And never, EVER apologize for asking questions.

Edited by: DRAGONCHILDE at: 6/10/2013 (10:34)


FROGMAN2013
SparkPoints: (1,747)
Fitness Minutes: (1,690)
Posts: 77
6/10/13 9:29 A

Actually, what you are suggesting is A LOT like Atkins, but just not the beginning two weeks. Keep trying to find what works for you while listening to what works for others....they may have a few good ideas.



DIDS70
Posts: 5,070
6/10/13 9:10 A

My guess is you are truly not "ready" to lose the weight. Personally, i would not want to put my health at risk to lose weight. God gave me a body that can heal itself and it needs respect and love.
Losing fast is downright dangerous. But if that's what you want to do, then you do not understand the SP philosophy and what the other posters were trying to convey. I don't think any diet plan/lifestyle change site worth it will advise losing weight fast.



CHESAPEAKE60
SparkPoints: (3,717)
Fitness Minutes: (2,038)
Posts: 396
6/10/13 9:04 A

I think perhaps you might want to review the responses again. Where was anyone "harsh"? I think perhaps you are equating not liking the answers with being harsh. If we just gave you the answers you wanted to hear we wouldn't be helping you. You are 30 pounds heavier than you want to be doing things your way, right? People taking the time to try and share information and tips that have worked for them is - in fact- showing a care and concern and wanting to be of help........ :)



KASIMA52
SparkPoints: (463)
Fitness Minutes: (430)
Posts: 58
6/10/13 8:56 A

Wow, some pretty harsh comments here, but I'll try to reply.
1) Everyone is different. Some people need to see quick results, or they have no incentive to continue. It's how their brains are wired. I can't change that. 1 lb. a week is too slow for me -- period. I'm not going to take almost a year to take off this weight, even if I have to starve myself and exercise myself to death. You need to accept that about me, and not be so judgmental. We all have our own ways of doing things to get the results we NEED to get.

2) What I meant about packing in food to get to 1200 calories is that I have been eating a lot of high-calorie crap, so 1200 calories is nothing. Eating nothing but vegetables is going to make it necessary to eat a lot more. Ask any vegan how much they have to eat to get their daily calories (I have done that).

3) Please don't judge me and try to push your way of doing things on me. I'm glad you have all had success, but you will just run me off, and I will fail if you are harsh and go the "my way or the highway" route. I was an abused child. I run away from people who berate me and tell me I'm wrong and I have to do it their way to succeed. And I hide in food, so if you can't say something kindly, just keep your opinions to yourself, o.k.?

That's it. I'm sorry I bothered you by even posting.



GOLFDAVE43
SparkPoints: (10,934)
Fitness Minutes: (13,834)
Posts: 39
6/10/13 8:37 A

Everyone stinks at dieting. It is a change in lifestyle and that is hard. If you really plan and work at it it will get easier over time.



CMCOLE
Posts: 2,667
6/10/13 7:40 A

Great responses.

Olga is correct - SP is not promoting a "diet" in the "quick fix" sense - it's a menu, a lifestyle, something that you're supposed to stick with



OLGA18
SparkPoints: (8,173)
Fitness Minutes: (3,522)
Posts: 511
6/10/13 6:49 A

The first definition of the word "diet" is "The usual food and drink of a person or animal".
So if you want to lose some weight you don't need to diet, you need to CHANGE your diet, and not just temporarily.
Think of it as embarking on a permanent healthy journey.
If you do that you can look forward to a future with not only a healthy body weight but an overall healthier and happier life!
And try to remind yourself that it is a journey, not a race!
Hang in there!




SLIMMERKIWI
SparkPoints: (122,396)
Fitness Minutes: (32,500)
Posts: 21,088
6/10/13 6:48 A

I agree with the comments about speed. I am also wondering if I interpreted this correctly:

"I realize I'm going to have to pack in the food to get to 1200 calories with this diet, .."

Am I to understand that you would normally eat BELOW this level?
After reading your blog, I think you would be best to talk about your plans with your Dr, and possibly ask for a referral to a Registered Dietitian. Do you NEED to lose weight, or do you THINK you need to. Your Dr will be able to guide you with this, too! Is your Dr aware that you take calcium and potassium supplements? I note that there were quite a few other ones, too, which is why I wondered if you just think you need them!

I think that your mindset is what lets you down re your patience. You look at this as "a diet" and as such it needs to be done quickly.

IF you look at it for what it is - a healthy lifestyle - and make gradual changes, you will find that not only will you lose weight if you NEED to lose weight, but you will do it in a safe manor, as well as stay on this journey for the rest of your life. It isn't about how fast we lose, but how long we maintain once we get there. For that, you need to approach it properly - SAFELY!

I don't see SP's advice as close to The Atkins Diet. In fact, I don't see it as a diet at all. Diets are about restrictions - this is about moderation. Diets are about deprivation - this is certainly not about that. With deprivation comes boredom and/or resentment, and that is where binging and/or falling off the wagon comes in.

As far as the balance of carbs/fats/protein is concerned, SP will tell you the ranges that you are best to be in. If you put in an honest estimate of your exercise regime, your current weight, gender (yes - some members have chosen the wrong one - LOL) AND a realistic time-frame for weight loss, then SP will also tell you the calorie range appropriate for you. Be aware that IF it comes up as 1200-1550, the 1200 is for a sedentary woman of average weight. If you are planning on 'exercising your tail off' then you need to eat a lot more!

Good luck,
Kris



CHESAPEAKE60
SparkPoints: (3,717)
Fitness Minutes: (2,038)
Posts: 396
6/10/13 6:25 A

I agree the "if I don't do it quickly I will give up" is concerning for a lasting effect. You have to make changes for a lifetime of healthy eating or weight will just come back. When you say give up what does that mean? because if it means go back to how you are currently eating to be carrying 30 extra pounds then that means you are not going into this for a lifetime of change. You might want to really think about your goals and let that healthy living be the goal rather than a number on the scale. :)



LADYSTARWIND
SparkPoints: (19,777)
Fitness Minutes: (15,878)
Posts: 1,132
6/10/13 1:32 A

If its not fast enough you will give up? Why would you do that?? Do you have another, better plan to get 30 lbs off and keep it off??

I suggest you re-read what Dragonchilde wrote...think about it...and if you don't believe it, then read some of the Success Stories here on Spark. Almost everyone tried to do it fast before they learned that eating healthy and choosing to eat that way for a lifetime was the Key to success at weight loss. Not a Diet--so its fine if you stink at that--but eating healthy, appropriate amounts and having the commitment and wisdom to realize this is what leads to being at a healthy weight and Staying There!! After all, who wants to do this again?! Learn to do it right, and there won't be an "again" for you...

I hope to see you posting soon on the Spark "Woo Hoo" Board that you are on your way to a healthy life! Trust the system--trust yourself--and don't give up!! emoticon

patti







KASIMA52
SparkPoints: (463)
Fitness Minutes: (430)
Posts: 58
6/9/13 11:18 P

Thanks for the tips! I will follow your advice as well as I can, but seriously, if I don't lose weight quickly, I will give up. I get discouraged very easily. Still, I'll do the plan and see what happens.



DRAGONCHILDE
SparkPoints: (56,306)
Fitness Minutes: (14,204)
Posts: 9,583
6/9/13 9:56 P

Yeah, diets don't work. So stop.

www.sparkpeople.com/resource/motivation_ar
ticles.asp?id=620


Skip the diets. Don't bother with restrictions or "no nos". This is NOT Atkins; believe me. Sparkpeople promotes a balanced, healthy diet.

Set up your program. You'll get a range (not a specific number) and yes, it will include percentages and targets for all of your macronutrient goals, including protein.

IF you're having trouble meeting your minimums, protein is the best place to start, and you'll find more tips on boosting calories here:

www.sparkpeople.com/resource/nutrition_art
icles.asp?id=593


1200 is for a minimum intake, the bare minimum you need to get the nutrients you need. It may not be enough for you, depending on your goals and how much exercise you get.

On your Sparkpage blog, you mention needing to lose 30 lbs, but then say you want to lose 2-3 lbs per week. Unfortunately, that's likely too aggressive for you. You simply aren't fat enough to lose that much, that quickly! A more doable goal for you would be around 1 lb per week.

It took time to gain the weight, it will take time to take it off. The less you have to lose, the slower it will come off. AT 20 lbs, you're going to be looking at less than a lb a week. AT 10? Just 1/4 to 1/2 a lb a week.

Also, you mention crunches as a way to get rid of belly fat. The unfortunate truth is you can do crunches until the cows come home, but they won't get rid of belly fat. :( That's because fat loss is a total body process... where you lose is largely genetic, and doing exercise to target fat won't work. Your muscles draw their energy from the blood stream, not the surrounding fat stores.

A better choice would be a full-body strength training program. When you lose weight, as much as 25% can come from lean muscle, resulting in what's unfondly known as "skinny fat" - where you weigh little, but have a high body fat percentage (And a slower metabolism!) Doing full-body strength training will help you get to your target pant size, too!



KASIMA52
SparkPoints: (463)
Fitness Minutes: (430)
Posts: 58
6/9/13 9:27 P

I've tried every diet under the sun, but they never work. I've decided to just eat veggies, meat and one helping of fruit a day. No additional salt, sugar, flour or dairy. Lots of protein. No nuts (too much fat). I realize I'm going to have to pack in the food to get to 1200 calories with this diet, but I haven't had too hard a time so far. Someone said this is a lot like the Atkins program, but it really isn't, because I eat all types of veggies, even the ones with sugar like beets and carrots

What I need someone to tell me is how many of my calories should be from protein? Does the tracker tell you that?



 
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