I'm feeling pretty good. Last year at about exactly this time I was 211 lbs and hated myself, so I started SparkPeople. To date, I've only lost 22 lbs.. in a whole year! But I'm not beating myself up. I see it kind of like quitting smoking, and any ex-smokers will probably understand: You can't do it for anyone else or for just any reason, because it won't work. You have to have that *thing* click in your head to get the determination necessary for a task like this, or like quitting smoking.
Anyways, we set our wedding date in October this year (wedding date is 10/12/13 by the way ) So I gave myself about another month before I started trying to lose weight again. And even then I was kind of on top of it one day, slacking the next and not really caring, until I'm on the top of it, but I always eventually start slacking.
Well, I guess it just occurred to me that I am definitely running out of time to lose the weight before the wedding- and not JUST the wedding, I want to be able to enjoy the HECK out of this coming year. I'm reigning in the new year as a bride to be; a once in a lifetime experience (God willing!)! I want to wear cute clothes and be active and feel happy and sexy, I want to do a lingerie shoot for my fianc� for a little private wedding present
And I just basically want to enjoy this year, like I said. I feel like my job wears me down so much, and the last couple years have been so financially stressful, and I just keep thinking about what I will be thinking about a few years from now when I look back on this time in my life. When I look back at our wedding pictures. I don't want to glance at the candid of me dancing and remember how fat and disgusting I felt I looked like. I want to look back on the year of planning with a smile, not with a dark fat shadow over it.
Anyways, I weighed myself this morning and I am finally in the 180's. I just could not get passed those damn 190's.. not that I tried everything I could, but I kept yo-yoing right around 192-197 for the last several months. Part of me feels like I shouldn't get too excited because it could just be a fluke, I could get on the scale tomorrow and it'll say 192 again
But anyways, success motivates me. And the thought of being happy and healthy and sexy for my fianc� and for myself and for our wedding day motivates the crap out of me!
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