I'm feeling pretty good. Last year at about exactly this time I was 211 lbs and hated myself, so I started SparkPeople. To date, I've only lost 22 lbs.. in a whole year! But I'm not beating myself up. I see it kind of like quitting smoking, and any ex-smokers will probably understand: You can't do it for anyone else or for just any reason, because it won't work. You have to have that *thing* click in your head to get the determination necessary for a task like this, or like quitting smoking.
Anyways, we set our wedding date in October this year (wedding date is 10/12/13 by the way ) So I gave myself about another month before I started trying to lose weight again. And even then I was kind of on top of it one day, slacking the next and not really caring, until I'm on the top of it, but I always eventually start slacking.
Well, I guess it just occurred to me that I am definitely running out of time to lose the weight before the wedding- and not JUST the wedding, I want to be able to enjoy the HECK out of this coming year. I'm reigning in the new year as a bride to be; a once in a lifetime experience (God willing!)! I want to wear cute clothes and be active and feel happy and sexy, I want to do a lingerie shoot for my fiancÚ for a little private wedding present
And I just basically want to enjoy this year, like I said. I feel like my job wears me down so much, and the last couple years have been so financially stressful, and I just keep thinking about what I will be thinking about a few years from now when I look back on this time in my life. When I look back at our wedding pictures. I don't want to glance at the candid of me dancing and remember how fat and disgusting I felt I looked like. I want to look back on the year of planning with a smile, not with a dark fat shadow over it.
Anyways, I weighed myself this morning and I am finally in the 180's. I just could not get passed those damn 190's.. not that I tried everything I could, but I kept yo-yoing right around 192-197 for the last several months. Part of me feels like I shouldn't get too excited because it could just be a fluke, I could get on the scale tomorrow and it'll say 192 again
But anyways, success motivates me. And the thought of being happy and healthy and sexy for my fiancÚ and for myself and for our wedding day motivates the crap out of me!
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