How to stick with it for good?

SparkPoints: (10,122)
Fitness Minutes: (8,670)
Posts: 846
11/16/11 11:31 A

For me the key is staying as stress free as possible. I no longer focus on food. I read all labels, think before I put anything in my mouth. I think how much work I will have to put in to over come if I eat that less than healthy food. Since it is just my husband and I, he gets the benefit of my journey.

SparkPoints: (86,902)
Fitness Minutes: (77,195)
Posts: 3,182
11/16/11 11:20 A

Pray to be able to afford healthy food and appreciate it when I can get it. I have no income now and don't know how I can manage to stick with it - but I am SO determined to keep exercising. I got SO close to my goal before my company closed. And I fear STRESS weight coming back - that's what caused it before. I am an undereater who resorts to junk in desperation to eat ANYTHING. I have lived on nothing but Ramen noodles for months at a time - we couldn't even afford spaghetti sauce. But I learned two things this year: how to pray and how to eat healthy and exercise. May God grant me the means to continue to support my household and my 94 year old mother (her own home) and the strength to live through this AGAIN!

Posts: 3,211
11/16/11 11:09 A

eat all things in moderation

Posts: 145
11/16/11 10:18 A

I can't honsetly say what will work for you...everyone's motivation is a little bit different. But here are a couple things that I try to keep in mind and/or practice. I am not saying they are right, but it is what works for me.

1. Be active on SP. Reading other peoples' blogs and successes/struggles gives me motivation and helps me realize I am not alone

2. Take everything 1 meal at a time. Just because I indulge on one meal doesn't mean I have to continue indulging or skip a meal. I just try to get back on track for the next meal.

3. If you have to, give yourself a free day. I know that I personally wouldn't have been able to stick with this if I counted my weekends. I am constantly busy and usually don't make the healthiest food choices or workout. On Monday though, I realize I have to get back on track, and now that I eat healthier during the week it makes me more conscious of the bad choices I am making over the weekend. It slows my weight loss taking breaks on the weekends, but it works for me.

4. Realize you are going to have ups and downs. I have been on SP for a little over a year, and every once in a while, there is a week that I don't workout. Simply because I don't want to. But I have found that as I continue, those weeks become less and less frequent. And that first day I get back to the gym, I feel sooo good afterwards!!

5. Remind yourself that the only one preventing you from succeeding is yourself. I am responsible for my weight loss, and every action I make contributes to my success/failure. Put up notes reminding yourself of this if you need to. On the fridge, the mirror, the TV...That way you will take that extra split-second to think before you act, which is sometimes all it takes to change your mind. Remember, although losing weight will change the way you look physically, it is also a huge change mentally.

Hope some of this was able to be of use to you, and good luck!!

Posts: 15
11/16/11 9:55 A

For myself, I look back over a year, and see what I accomplished (if anything significant!). I see that one year goes by quickly, if you don't think about it and you are not in a hurry. I am new, I want to say hello and thank you. SisterKiki

SparkPoints: (11,250)
Fitness Minutes: (4,590)
Posts: 265
11/16/11 9:34 A

Look at accomplishments and then the past. Do you want to return to the old ways. Don't you feel great now! Imagine how better you will feel with further improvements in health and weight.

Posts: 776
11/16/11 7:15 A

First of all, being down on yourself doesn't help. I have loads of personal experience there. So give yourself a big smile every morning and get on with it.

While I have lost only 20lbs at this point and have quite a bit more to go. Here are a few tips that have kept me on track this time.
1. Read the sparkmail daily if possible - you're bound to find a new little tip or inspiration there to keep you going.
2. Track your food and be honest - the only person you're lying to is yourself and it is NOT the end of the world if you go over your allotted calories 2 or 3 times a month.
3. Set small goals - I do mine in 5lb increments - all those 5lb losses will get me to my goal eventually
4. I weigh daily but this doesn't work for people who are discouraged by fluctuations on the scale. You know what works for you, so stick to that.
5. I also write the next reasonable weight I am hoping to see on the sale onto the palm of my hand in the morning. For example, this morning I was 191 - so I write 189 on my palm as a reminder through the day to make good choices. It may seem weird but it works for me.

Finally, I remind myself that I am not a child (and have not been one for quite a long time) and I can delay gratification to get the better result. I also read one sparkblog that stuck with me. It basically asserted that this is NOT that hard. We make it difficult in our mind, but it isn't. Losing a job is hard, being homeless is hard, losing a loved one is hard. In comparison, eating healthy and taking care of yourself is really pretty easy.

Posts: 111
11/16/11 6:52 A

I think the key is to stop thinking of it as a "diet" that you do for awhile and then will stop at some point. Better to make small lifestyle changes gradually over time, in a way that you will be able to keep up for the rest of your life. It doesn't matter if you can do a crazy crash diet and lose 25 pounds in a month. We all know that it's going right back on, plus some extra. But if you can lose 25 pounds in a year, now that weight is staying off for good and will lead to better health!

SparkPoints: (36,537)
Fitness Minutes: (51,300)
Posts: 303
11/16/11 6:01 A

First, I think there is a lot of good advice on this page. I would suggest finding a way to keep your diet on your radar. I use SP for that. Every morning I try and earn points by reading articles and completing health topics. It is both a learning experience as well as a re-committing to my health. I log all the food I eat into Spark which keeps me mindful of what I am consuming. I work my exercise in the first thing in the day, so it is my top priority. Also Spark is a great way for you to keep track of your timing -- today it made me aware that there is only 8 weeks between Thanksgiving and New Years but that at a healthy weight loss of 2 lbs a week that is 16 lbs. I also log my weight evrey week into an excel spreadsheet which keeps me mindful that I do not lose every week and that is fine as long as I am moving down. I also use percentages as a way to keep on track -- what percentage of my original body weight have I lost. What percentage of my total weight loss goal have I made. So if your goal is 25 lbs, It can be difficult thinking well I have 10 more pounds to lose but far more managable when you think I have already completed 64% of my goal. When you have a lot of weight to lose (such as I do), the percentage idea makes it more managable and more encouraging and helps you to focus on how far you have come rather than how far you have to go. As a final comment I liked the indifvidual who commented that weight loss if not a battle to be won - it is a lifestyle change to live. So make the permanent changes that you can live with - re educate yourself and your body.

SparkPoints: (16,354)
Fitness Minutes: (11,992)
Posts: 2,839
11/16/11 5:16 A

* Keep believing (totally agree with GBOOMER)
* NO EATING OUT--restaurants are the root of a LOT of problem $ and weight gain
* Keep those water bottles filled and ready
* Totally agree with the last three in GBOOMER too.
* Find new workouts to keep you going. SP has a ton! So you don't have to look far and they are free!
* Keep your meal tracking. If you can't do much of else, keep that in your life.
* Walk, Walk, Walk or something similar that is easy to stick to.

Posts: 4,822
11/16/11 4:49 A

One discovers the "how" while doing it.

It helps to:

- believe that it is possible.
- not be in too much of a hurry.
- not push too hard, but also not slack off too much or too often.
- believe it can be fun and look for the fun.

SparkPoints: (21,309)
Fitness Minutes: (19,172)
Posts: 223
11/16/11 2:04 A

I am, so unfashion conscious, you would think I didn't have a mother. As a teen I wore a size 12.... then as a busy, workaholic adult, I gravitated to anything size 12.... and couldn't remember jr from misses sizes. so all this time, been wearing a 12.... whatever fit. Here having lost 21lbs, someone gave me a size 8 skinny jeans and holy cow--- they fit!

I always want to be able to say I wear a size 8... or smaller!!

Edited by: RDY4THIN at: 11/16/2011 (02:08)

SparkPoints: (51,157)
Fitness Minutes: (46,515)
Posts: 1,117
11/15/11 7:53 P

This is a lifestyle change!!

SparkPoints: (14,698)
Fitness Minutes: (7,343)
Posts: 226
11/15/11 4:29 P

Think about my children & living a healthy life with them.

Posts: 7,921
11/15/11 4:23 P

It takes dedication, determination and one day at a time

SparkPoints: (4,978)
Fitness Minutes: (2,528)
Posts: 58
11/15/11 3:30 P

Sounds like you might be in a bit of a rut, as I like to call it. I was in my rut for 5+ years... depressing I know, but the good news is yours doesn't have to be that long. You only have 25 lbs to lose. I know i should shut up for saying that. It is hard even if it's just 5 lbs, but what it takes is breaking patterns. It wont be easy in the beginning. I drank nightly and ate poorly for years. One day... I dont know what it was, I couldn't tell you the exact moment or anything like that, but "one day" I realized it was all under my control. I was the one keeping myself from my own happiness. The alcohol, food, lack of exercise wasnt the problem, the problem was me and my attitude. Well Im on the way back now and you can be too. Just trust in yourself, make small changes and find a reason to get to your goal. Any reason will do, eventually you'll have so many reasons just based off how you feel but for now maybe it's just to look great in that sweater dress. Good luck, its within you!

Posts: 2,237
11/15/11 2:48 P

After 50 years of biking, 40 years of jogging, 30 years aerobics, 10 for Yoga, and 5 for strength Pilates classes, the bottom line of what keeps me going is that exercise makes me feel energetic. As aches and pains have come with aging (now age 54), it is incredibly more important. The more I exercise, the better I feel both physically and emotionally. I am more effective at work because I feel great than on days ( or weeks!) that I miss exercise.

I feel as though I can take on the world after completing a 4-6 mile run at 6 AM. If I can do that, I can do anything, even face those problems of the world in my life today.

I prefer feeling energetic and on top of my world, rather than sulk in laziness and feeling sluggish. I hope this helps.

SparkPoints: (37,637)
Fitness Minutes: (38,627)
Posts: 290
11/15/11 2:44 P

Continuing to be conscious of the choices you have to make, and that they are YOUR choices. You can choose to sit on the couch and pop candy and drink soda, or you can choose to be active and eat fantastic tasting food that fuels your body. Only you can make those choices for yourself. It is how I got fat. It is how I am getting thin. It is how I will stay that way.

SparkPoints: (5,175)
Fitness Minutes: (7,796)
Posts: 23
11/15/11 10:10 A

I think really enjoying cooking and learning about food is key. Once you enjoy cooking and once you know all the good benefits of healthy food I think that desire for "junk food" will start to go away. We all love chocolate lets be honest and that's totally fine! You just need to have it in moderation, for example the first bite of chocolate is like a little piece of heaven, 10 later you will start to feel nauseous. It's all about finding the happy balance! I still do that calorie counting but I think I will eventually stop once I get the hang of knowing what I want and to listen to my body and stop eating when I'm full!

SparkPoints: (1,654)
Fitness Minutes: (268)
Posts: 13
11/15/11 3:26 A

Calorie counting. Without that I think losing weight is out of the picture. I log the food I eat into the nutrition tracker everyday and stay within my calorie range. My meals consist of alot of veggies, so I get to eat more of it without going over my calorie range so I don't feel hungry. Also I allow myself to indulge on special occasions so I never feel like I'm cutting out my fav foods. Its all about balance and eating healthy. I want to have the sparkling eyes, flowing hair, and shining skin. I want to look pretty and be active.

Posts: 301
11/15/11 12:49 A

It has to be a lifestyle change...and you have to accept that sometimes you'll have a day when you mess up...but then you have to keep going! And then of course if you can find healthy ways to satisfy your food cravings, more power to you!!

SparkPoints: (51,157)
Fitness Minutes: (46,515)
Posts: 1,117
11/14/11 11:17 P

This is your life....this is an open door ready for you to take advantage of every opportunity.

Posts: 5,331
11/14/11 8:36 P

This is an amazing topic and something i really need to figure out

Posts: 1
11/14/11 6:49 P

very true - about tomorrow is a new day. Thanks for the inspiration

SparkPoints: (14,805)
Fitness Minutes: (14,189)
Posts: 245
11/14/11 3:24 P

I want to applaud all of you. What I know for me is that it is about health and about feeling good about myself. I am so blessed because my husband is very supportive. I don't always have good days but tracking helps me not fall off the wagon completely. I pick myself up and tomorrow is always a new day.

SparkPoints: (10,790)
Fitness Minutes: (27,878)
Posts: 72
11/14/11 2:44 P

The real question you need to ask yourself is just what it is you're trying to stick to. If you think about eating well and exercising as just one more duty/chore/responsibility, then you will never keep it up, because there are always claims on your time, energy and attention that you will experience as more urgent. But if you focus on exploring and prioritizing what makes you feel good, body and spirit, then it will be easier to make taking care of yourself a part of your daily life - and decent food and exercise will feel like a welcome relief in a busy day full of cares. Deep down, your body wants to be used, and it wants to be nourished. You need to trust that and tune into it.
I may not always be able to stick to the plan in the sense of steadily loosing weight every week, but I keep on moving - every day - and I feed myself and my family well, most days, most meals. Tracking helps keep me committed to what gives me energy and joy. I'm still about 8 kg from my goal weight, but I feel great - and will continue feeling great as long as I stick with what I've learned here.

Posts: 107
11/14/11 2:35 P

Put yourself first! I wake-up every morning and exercise BEFORE going to work. When I come home from work, I immediately take the time to cook a healthy meal BEFORE watching TV or doing anything else. I try to get eight hours of sleep. I am in bed every night before 9:30PM. There is nothing more important than taking care of body. I am kind to myself. I am at the top of my priority list. In essence, put alot of "stock,"time and effort in taking care of yourself and spend less time on things that are not important.

SparkPoints: (44,693)
Fitness Minutes: (19,838)
Posts: 2,500
11/14/11 1:47 P

Love doing it

Posts: 11,476
11/14/11 11:47 A

I just take it one day at a time. And if I stumble I get back up again and start all over.

A healthy and toned body is something I want more than anything. And I have got to work to achieve it.

Posts: 245
11/14/11 10:46 A

for me is taking it one day at the time

my downfall has always been setting unrealistic goals and failing horribly

this round, i am trying to focus on TODAY

SparkPoints: (417)
Fitness Minutes: (0)
Posts: 2
11/14/11 12:31 A

I'm pretty new to this site so I may be breaking rules or being naive in this post - but I will take that risk! Actually, this is my first post on the message boards! That being said . . .

I relate to most of what has been said so far. As a matter of fact, the first several lines of NEWME505's post could have been written by me. However, today I feel more powerful than I have in a very long time. It is because I stumbled on some seriously wonderful Spark articles by Dean Anderson, Behavioral Psychology Expert. (I have to admit his title rather scared me, but thank goodness I didn't notice it until I had read some of his articles. LOL) I would suggest reading "Put the 'I' Back Into Your Vocabulary" - "Mastering the Mysteries of Motivation - Part 1" and "Mastering the Mysteries of Motivation - Part 2" - as well as "Become Your Own Best Motivator" There are several other article, also - but those articles were so powerful and worked together so well that I ended up printing them off, getting a highlighter, and going over them like I was studying for a test! (I am 59 so it has been awhile since I have done something like that!) The results have been amazing for me. I have totally controlled the night time eating binge. (Major accomplishment!) I have handled the little voice inside my head so it hasn't been so unfriendly. The techniques seem to be really working. I know there will be rough roads ahead. I know my rose garden has thorns in it. It's just that now I have a soft cushion under my bottom and leather gloves on! I also know that if I need to add some more stuffing to the cushion or re-enforcement is needed for those gloves - well, I have my printed out articles within arms reach so I can "get ur done"! (Now, if I could just work a little Shakespeare in here, I might have the perfect post. )

Hang in there! We all can do this if we just remember that it is a journey that we must take one step at a time - and it is okay to take moments to breathe as we do it.

Edited by: ALUVINLIFE at: 11/14/2011 (00:33)

SparkPoints: (26,757)
Fitness Minutes: (24,072)
Posts: 568
11/13/11 10:58 P

I know your concern.

I am feeling terrific at the moment. I have lost more weight than I thought possible - and if I don't lose any more weight I will be happy at this BMI of 20.5.

I caught up with some friends on the weekend - and one told me I look just like I did in school! (I know I have more wrinkles, and more grey hair - and am a little heavier than I would have been at school, but it was lovely to hear).

My sister was telling me my clothes are too big, and I need to take them in.

I just have this concern in the back of my mind that I can't keep it up. That I will slip back.
I need to keep tracking, and connecting with SP - and taking 1 day at a time.

Good luck with your journey!

SparkPoints: (18,842)
Fitness Minutes: (23,509)
Posts: 510
11/13/11 10:05 P

My one advice is to start using the SP nutrition tracker several times a day, after each time you eat. You could try the menu too and just try to follow it for a day or two and prove to yourself that you can stick with something, but I don't use the menu. I eat what I want, but I write it down and SP figures out calories. This helps me feel in control and it helps me realize exactly what I'm eating and then I kind of WANT to just stay in those calories, like it's a game. Once you start doing that, you'll see weight slide off of you and you'll be hooked.

Posts: 301
11/13/11 9:33 P

If it isn't my either Wonderful, or a nutritious addition to my life, I don't eat it. For example, I love mexican food. I will share something with my husband so I am forced to eat only half, then...I won't eat the tortilla because it is neither nutritive nor particularly interesting to eat. Some people try to cut the sour cream and guacamole...Not me, that is the stuff I love, I can easily cut most of the rice or tortilla without missing it. I also believe in Frozen Yogurt and semisweet chocolate chips. Cutting my portions of meat that I prepare, for example I used to make a whole package of Bratwurst for my family. 6 high cal sausages for 2 adults and 2 toddlers. Now I will make 3 sausages, and cut them in quarters and we share. It is just a few less bites, but probably 300 calories for me and my husband. AND, our expensive groceries last longer.
Lastly, planning a few meals each week has been a huge help. I am stay at home mom of 2, then we also have foster children, so if I don't have all the stuff ready for dinners, we will order chinese food or something. When I have 3 or 4 meal options written on the fridge, it makes life much easier and healthier.

Posts: 250
11/13/11 9:29 P

I understand how you feel Maria, I too have joined about 1 year ago when I was told I had pre-diabetes and bought the sparks book and was gun ho for about 6 months and now my wekght is creeping back up. I don't eat healthy like I should. I have went to WW once and never went back. I have a daughter I want to eat healthy too, but she doesn't really care to or to exercise so I am really on my own. My brother bought me a Ipod touch for my birthday this year, thought that would help, well that's debateable, and work don't even get me started there. Anytime you want to talk e-mail me and we will help each other out.

Posts: 1
11/13/11 8:56 P

Yes, I do need help, I have joined SP I don't remember if it was a year ago or 2, the intention to lose weight and eat healthy is there but I must not be serious, I go to the gym for a couple of days and then make excuses, I started a weight loss program Weight Watchers and didn't go back, I am guilty of not teaching my children healthy eating habits, I work full time have to care for my husband who is in the pre stages of diabetes, has Depression, stomach problems, I want to make losing weight and eating healthier my priority but, my problem is not being strict enough on myself or sticking to anything and you are right you have to want it and it has to start with yourself, I think I'm ready now, but I do need a lot of support

Posts: 3,101
11/13/11 8:10 P

Here is what worked for me:
Write down the benefits of losing weight
Write down the health risks and other bad effects of not losing weight
Read the lists when you are feeling tempted to go off your plan.

Set mini goals and rewards for yourself (five pounds, new nail polish, ten pounds, pedicure)

Use a smaller glass for your wine, or make spritzers, then if you have a second you're still OK.

Posts: 3,451
11/13/11 7:23 P

Every journey has its ups and downs.

Posts: 53
11/13/11 7:05 P

I think it’s important to really decide why you want to be healthy. Often we try to motivate ourselves by using negative reasons such as I don’t want to be fat and lonely or I don’t want to be sick. I have tried to focus on loving myself and focusing on health. I decided that I wanted to live an active lifestyle. I wanted to be able to kayak, mountain bike, run and travel. I want to live a long healthy life being and active person.

I would encourage you to start caring for yourself before you focus on weightloss. When I started my journey towards better health I started by focusing on decreasing my stress and taking care of myself. I told myself that at the end of every weekday I would do something relaxing to take care of myself and lower my stress level. I made a “menu” of activities like have a warm cup of tea while listening to relaxing music, take a warm bath, journal or paint my fingernails. They weren’t expensive or super time consuming but I started to relax and feel less frazzled. You might start out trying to do it twice a week and increase from there. When you feel stressed, pick an activity off the list instead of food. It is amazing how your mind and body change when your stress level decreases.

SparkPoints: (255)
Fitness Minutes: (0)
Posts: 86
11/13/11 6:44 P

I was like that for about 5 years. It's like I was in quicksand.

As odd as it seems, the only thing that got me out of that mindset was going on a sort of radical, strict plan temporarily. I tried the 17-day diet, but only stayed on it for 1 week. However, in just that short period of time, I proved to myself that I COULD stick to a plan. I think I stuck to it becaues it was so strict that I didn't have many choices about what to eat. There was not that much thinking involved in it. During that week, I lost a few lbs. but more important, I gained the confidence that I could actually stick to something. After that 1 week, I started calorie counting. That was June. I've gone from a size 14 to a size 8, and it has felt almost effortless this time (I don't restrict myself from any foods; I just calorie count---actually calorie cycle so that I can eat more on days I have special events).

So, it may help to try something totally different and radical just for a short period of time to get back into the "I can do this" mode.

Edited by: MELO1968 at: 11/13/2011 (18:52)

SparkPoints: (64,737)
Fitness Minutes: (32,337)
Posts: 3,707
11/13/11 5:31 P

I've had to admit that for me it will probably never get easier! It will be a struggle, to a greater or lesser degree, for the rest of my life. I do not like to exercise, and I have to force myself to stick with it, but I've lost 36 lbs. so far and am determined to lose another 16 within the next year. Hang in there... you can do it.

SparkPoints: (32,256)
Fitness Minutes: (14,627)
Posts: 2,594
11/13/11 3:37 P

I know for me it really became reality when I got so scared of having the same health problems that my sister had and passed away from them too, at age 54! She was in denial for years and I could see myself being the same way, even after my Dr. told me several times that he was so concerned about my weight! His preaching to me didn't affect me at all. I had to see it for myself and I'm so thankful that I did! One of my best helps is the nutrition tracker and I track everything that I eat and another thing that helps me so much is trying to eat my 5 fruit/veg/day! I feel more full and don't think about food so much! You can do it, I know. My husband has told me that I had to get scared and mad enough and he's so right! Get upset over what's going on in your body now and that truly can help you get started with what you want/need to do to feel better and be better!

SparkPoints: (6,482)
Fitness Minutes: (893)
Posts: 410
11/13/11 1:53 P

Oh goodness, did I ever have that t-shirt! I know everything you are describing because for 30 years - I'm now a zippy just-turned-can't-quite-believe-it-60, going on 39 - I lived my life doing precisely as you are just now.

I'm afraid that I firmly believe that you have to WANT to do this, because nobody, but nobody, is going to do it for you. Together we can do this - but in the end, only you alone can do it. When I was your age, the internet hadn't been invented, let alone SP. If you read my blogs and posts you'll see how much I was in despair and how finding SP was an almost-missed accident. But - here's the thing: when I discovered SP, joined and immediately found loads of Friends, who have been fantastic, my stars were in alignment. It was time. I was receptive the the conviction that I HAD to change - but I'll tell you this: without SP, I'd still be wallowing in negative, self-defeating behaviours. Finding SP has been nothing short of a miracle, because I now think completely differently about food - I am no longer a hostage to Satan and his sidekick, the POG (The Pesky Overeating Gremlin) who live in my fridge and pantry! I cannot believe that this is me - not only that, I'm utterly utterly convinced that THIS time, it's somehow different. I'm no longer dieting, and BOY! has that taken a massive amount of pressure off me.

I would LOVE to be a buddy for you, because I sense in you how I have lived for so long. Is this journey going to be a cinch? Sometime yes, sometimes, no. Am I going to stumble at some point? Who knows. Life is all about reality and I am mindful of that. But, jumping on my bus (you'll have to read my posts to find out about that!) means that there are literally loads of people on this incredible Magical Mystery Tour who will stoop down and pick up anyone who stumbles..... IF THEY WANT TO BE PICKED UP.

This is about choices. No-one is holding a gun to your head, but we can't do it FOR you, that has to be your choice, not ours. For what they are worth, these are tips which have worked for me: if you get to SP as soon as possible when you wake up, it'll set you on the right emotional path for the day. Prepare your breakfast table settings the night before, plus the scales and foods, so that you aren't seduced to go of-track by the POG. Track, track track your food (truly and honestly) and keep checking the pie chart as you go along, so you can see how you're doing fats/proteins/carbs-wise - and make further food choices for the day accordingly. Choose smart, too - find things you like which are low cal and CHOOSE to pick at those. Don't have things around which are your Achilles Heel, because Satan lives there, ready to lure you like a siren onto the rocks. Get to know the nutrition labels on all foods, be a pain in the butt if you have to - pretty soon you'll find that it's actually an exciting new hobby. AND BUY THE SPARK AND READ IT, it's fantastic! Being 'in the driving seat' nutritionally is incredibly empowering - and if anyone had told me 8 weeks ago I'd be saying this, I'd have never believed them.

I don't lose weight quickly, so I've joined the Slow Losers Team, a great bunch of people amongst other great teams I've also joined. Find the right Friends for you and, if you CHOOSE to lose weight (and boy, do you ever have a reason if heart problems are in your family) you will do this. Now, I do mean this in the most positive way, so please don't be hurt or upset because I'm saying it from a place of utmost honesty and genuine CARING:- it's time to stop feeling self pity and expecting someone else to do this for you. No-one controls what I put in my mouth other than me - all the whining I did about trying to find out who or what had happened to me in order to make me eat stupidly was, frankly, a pathetic waste of time. It didn't matter WHAT the reason was, it was always MY choice what I pigged out on. I did this to me, year in year out, nobody else. I got to 60 before suddenly accepting this and growing up. A wonderful Spark Friend told me to stop feeling self pity and, after I thought about it, I realised that she spoke nothing but the uncomfortable truth. It hit me like a dart - so please be assured I'm telling you with the very best of intentions. We all have daily pressures, stresses, and I've 'met' some people in SP who have handicaps and problems which truly don't bear thinking about.

I am here for you if you want me to be. You are so lucky to have found SP but it's up to you how you choose to use it. With everything SP, it's always your choice.

From the heart....

SparkPoints: (14,427)
Fitness Minutes: (17,590)
Posts: 151
11/13/11 1:34 P

I wonder if it would help for you to sit down and examine what actually motivates you, or what you want from this journey and life in general. Then maybe make a list or visual representation of what that is, along with the positive outcomes of healthy choices vs. focusing on the negative aspects of your current diet/situation, and keep it in a form you can keep referring back to when you start to feel like this. Sometimes when you're in that mindset of feeling like you've blown it, or you'll never get to where you want to be, it becomes so much harder to pull yourself out of it and you find it easier to go back to old ways. I was always such a skeptic when it came to the believing in the power of positive thinking, but as I get older I feel like there is some truth to it.

Posts: 10,776
11/13/11 1:32 P

don't try to do it all at once. if you suddenly decided you had to walk around backwards everyday, hop over cracks, spin twice when you reached corners, and bunny hop up stairs going two up-one back-two up-one back the whole way, how long do you think that would last? not very. any habit can take up to six weeks to break. so don't do them all at once, just pick one thing and focus on that one thing until it is habit. then pick another simple little thing and work on it until it is a habit. don't beat yourself up about all the other stuff, just put your blinders on, nose to the grindstone and start plugging away.

if you drink too much wine on weekends, buy smaller bottles. leave one where the wine goes and put the rest somewhere else that you have to go and get it if you want it. also, pick a weekend where you choose not to drink. don't not let yourself drink, but choose to skip it and if you do that once a twice a month, that can be a little boost for you, either in gaining less, maintaining instead of gaining or even losing instead of maintaining.
and make a list of the foods that you mindlessly eat and either buy less of them [so you actually have to go out and get them if you want them] or don't buy them at all. again, for many people putting things totally off limits puts them as a prime target for a binge item, so just choose to not have it all the time. say if you love chips and cookies, but you tend to binge on them. this week, instead of having both in the house, buy a bag of chips [or a bag less than you usually buy] and those are your chips for the week, no cookies this week. next week buy a bag of cookies and skip the chips. less food in the house means less to binge on. and if pasta is your food, make a deal with yourself that you can have as much pasta as you want, you just have to have an equal part of veggies with it. so if you want mac and cheese, you can have it. just if you have half a cup of it, it needs to be with half a cup of veggies [mixed in, on the side, as a salad, whatever floats your boat]. if you are still hungry, wait 20 mins [and don't just wait, find a book to read, a tv show to watch, a game to play] and if at the end you are still hungry, have another half cup of the mac and half cup of the veg. then wait another 20 min.

and what exactly are your lazy ways? if you run to the local fast food joint instead of cooking, track out what you usually get. next, plan out a few options that are better for you from that same place, write them down and keep them in your wallet so that the next time you are in the situation, you pick from your menu and make a better choice than usual.
if you make boxed meals instead of cooking, add veggies in. i love lipton sides as a backup, i just add a container of frozen broccoli and a cup or two of beans [i cook mine from dried and then freeze them for convenience]. it drops the sodium and fat, increases the protein and fiber and make it a much more filling option, all for the added hassle of opening two extra packages and dumping them in.
if you cook, just use not so great recipes, start altering them. one of my family's favorite recipes makes nine servings but calls for 2 sticks of butter. that's a lot of butterfat in there that doesn't do a whole lot. so i started cutting it back. half a stick at first, then down to a whole stick. once no one noticed since i'd halved the butter in the recipe, i settled for using just half a stick of butter in the recipe for the whole family, but when i make it just for me i cut back to a Tablespoon or tow of olive oil. just an fyi, a stick of butter has about 800 cals [at least the kind i buy]. two sticks means that recipe has 1600 cals from butter alone, so each of the nine servings had 177 cals from butter alone. using just half a stick instead, that's 400 cals for the whole thing, or 44 cals in each of the 9 servings. that's saving 130 cals a serving in reducing the butter alone. your recipes may or may not need that much work. but if it calls for 2 Tablespoons of oil, consider trying 5 teaspoons instead and seeing what happens. if no one complains or you don't notice a difference, try cutting back to four teaspoons. and keep at it. if you have a recipe that calls for a whole bottle of dressing, leave a few servings in the bottle. increase the portions of veg. they're little changes, but if you keep making them, they add up a lot over time.

Posts: 517
11/13/11 12:59 P

when I get overwhelmed at the thought that healthy living is a life long journey I BREATHE and bring myself back to the present. I break it down to a meal at a time and make choices accordingly. I plan my meals and treats and portion them. I insist on the fact that a healthy life style is not about cutting out the foods I like that are less healthy; healthy living is about balance. I always have a choice in the moment. Namaste.

Posts: 6
11/13/11 12:45 P

sorry I do not have any advice for you. I am having the same issues and I just posted about it in my blog. I feel like I should be so fed up by now that It would force me to change.....not the case here unfortunately.

SparkPoints: (6,038)
Fitness Minutes: (2,940)
Posts: 163
11/13/11 12:36 P

I remind myself that I want to be there for my kids when they grow up and have kids of their own. My fiance's father died at a young age and it's been one of the hardest things he's ever had to go through. It will be 10 years this December and it still hurts. I don't want that for my children.

SparkPoints: (27,817)
Fitness Minutes: (18,577)
Posts: 740
11/13/11 12:35 P

Make a promise to God.

SparkPoints: (643)
Fitness Minutes: (649)
Posts: 24
11/13/11 10:11 A

I dont understand myself. Im soo down on myself because of my 20-25 pound weight gain. Yet I continue to mindlessly eat bAd or too much or drink more than 1 glass of wine in weekends I dont get it. Its a vicious cycle because after I indulge i beat myself up & it sets me up again
People have said When im fed up I should just do something about it but it sounds soo easy & when I see them looking great, having control over their eating & exercising all the time I think if they can I cAn but then I try to do it (and not even that strict) & I continually fail or fall back to my lazy ways.Some say they had wake up calls when their health was in jeopardy. Mine isnt yet...... but actually when you think of it I have heart disease in the family & all my fat has gone to my stomach mostly & waist & I read that means I could get a slew of diseases from that weight gain! So you would think that is my health scare?!?
I just need a push, motivation, a life change & a better attitude right?
When is it gonna stick for me & reallly truly fight the temptations??