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Fitness Minutes: (20,445)
1,626 4/20/12 9:42 P
I'm glad to hear he is trying. It sounds like he does have a reason, but is just frustrated that he has failed so many times before. As most the other posters already noted, one can't make another person change, it's hard enough for us to make our own self change.
Now that he is wanting to do it though, I would recommend that you guys sit together when on this site and learn how to do things right. Work together so you both see the importance of 80/20 rule. Get food scales and such to expose the lie of "eyeballing" food. Focus more on nutrition since that is actually easier than exercise. Then make sure you exercise routine is something you can enjoy for life, and not burn out on. I think you guys have a great start, just keep the faith
If the situation were reversed, how would you want to be treated? If he suddenly completely changed his lifestyle and eating habits, while you were still content with sitting on the couch, how would you respond?
The fact that he's going to the gym with you, and participating in your healthy eating plan at home is a pretty loving and caring response in my opinion. He could be the kind of person that tries to drag you back to the couch, by guilting you about spending time at the gym. Or he could sabotage you by bringing home pizza every night. But he's being supportive, and that should be recognized.
If he wants to start going the extra mile, than he will, but you can't make that decision for him. The little changes he's making now will have a positive effect in the long run, and hopefully he'll adding to those small changes over time.
Fitness Minutes: (14,204)
9,576 4/5/12 5:34 P
Actually, the reason your husband is likely still big isn't because he's putting on muscle... it's probably because he's eating too much. Contrary to popular belief, the way to lose weight isn't about the gym (although exercise is a critical part of a healthy lifestyle) - it's all about the kitchen.
When you have a poor diet, then no amount of exercise can outrun it. When you overeat (and overeating because you've been to the gym and "can" is common) you will still continue to gain weight. Just like if you don't eat right, you won't lose weight because you're still not burning more than you're eating!
Fitness Minutes: (436)
5 4/3/12 5:57 P
It seems like the talking really helped. He did 45 minutes on the elliptical today, when he normally does 30 minutes max. I'm so proud of him!!
I'm jealous that your husband even goes to the gym. I would love it if mine would go with me. He is totally unmotivated right now and doesn't have any interest in losing weight with me.
Fitness Minutes: (436)
5 4/3/12 8:48 A
We talked some yesterday on our way to the gym, and he said he just doesn't see that it's doing anything going to the gym because he's been going since he was in 8th grade, and he's still big. He said it's discouraging to gain when he starts back at the gym because he has so much to lose. I told him it's because he's building up muscle, which weighs more than fat, and that he just needs to lengthen his cardio time because that's the best way to burn the fat. It's a work in progress, but he seems like he's going to give it a shot. Thanks for the insight!
I challenged my husband to a weight loss competition last year. He ended up loosing 70+ pounds and has been very successful in maintenance. I think the key to this working was 1) he's VERY competitive and 2) he had the desire he just needed a bit of a push. It would not have worked if he wasn't interested in the first place.
I'm with Zorbs. Until he wants to change, he won't, and if you're too aggressive, he'll see it as nagging. Just be supportive of his gym time and continue to only cook healthy meals and have only healthy snacks. You can try to encourage him to get in extra exercise without couching it that way by asking him to go for walks with you or try a new class or things like that.
Fitness Minutes: (95,822)
12,914 4/1/12 10:09 P
sorry, you can't force someone to change unless they want to.
Fitness Minutes: (436)
5 4/1/12 8:38 P
I'm just curious to know how I should go about motivating my husband to kick his weight loss into high gear without coming off as pushy or hurting his feelings. My husband is really overweight, and I worry about what health issues he might have or face in the future, so I'd like him to jump on board with me. I have tried getting him to the gym, which he does do, and we eat pretty healthy at home. The problem is he doesn't go the extra mile. He just coasts with it, if that makes sense, so he's maintaining weight rather than losing it. He really dislikes the way he looks, and I can see that it really affects his outlook on life and himself. I desperately want to help motivate him without him feeling worse about himself. Is this something I should even attempt or should I let him come to it on his own?
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