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How can you want something so bad, but ........



 
 
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MINKY1111
SparkPoints: (2,428)
Fitness Minutes: (3,190)
Posts: 80
12/8/12 5:45 A

i know just how yu feeel.....oo be a healthy weight..what a joyyy it would be... this site made me believe it is possible.. knowing there is a spark of hope can ignite yur dream....a great endeavor is 5 percent inspiration and 95 percent perspiration... its not enuff to want something we have to make it happen!!! live your dream..i pretend i am a healthy weight and buy the right foods and do the exercize i need.believe it will happen to you..want it bad enough to change...plan what yu will eat.. planning ahead takes alll the gess work and spontaneous bad choices out of the equation..... my down fall is ice cream..I neverrr buy it anymore... another is cake...i can see it in front of me but i say .... well i remember having that , enjoy the memory and move on past it..that was the old meee.



SLIMMERKIWI
SparkPoints: (120,818)
Fitness Minutes: (32,354)
Posts: 21,005
12/7/12 5:06 P

Linda - you CAN do this - just have faith in yourself!

As ARCHIMEDESII has said, it might be beneficial for you to seek the help of a Therapist to help you with this. Sometimes Therapy is what is needed to find the motivation that we need, first, tho'! It can work wonders with a drug addict or alcoholic, and it can work wonders for someone in your situation, too!

Have you talked with your Dr about your plans? If not, I would make an appointment with him/her so they are aware of what is going on. It COULD be that there is something medical going on which is adding to this - things like Hypothyroidism. A blood test should show whether this is/isn't the case, and often things like that are easily treated. While you are with the Dr you could ask for a referral to a Therapist to so that you are given the tools to help you on this journey.

In the meantime, even just reducing soda/juice and/or increasing the fruit/veges will help you considerably. It will make it easier to make another little change a little later.

Have faith in you - WE do!

Kris xx



STODD251
Posts: 640
12/7/12 12:05 P

Keep trying. It is really, really hard, but it's not impossible. Don't beat yourself up over the bad choices. Maybe tracking on here is not tangible enough. This may sound weird, but I'm a teacher so forgive me... Something I do when I'm having trouble motivating myself is to make a chart for myself. Maybe you can get a calendar and allow yourself to earn a star every time you meet a goal. For example, If you set a goal to do no snacking that wasn't pre-planned into your nutrition for the day and achieve it, GOLD star! You've made a huge victory. By making things like this more tangible and highly visible, you can motivate yourself to keep those healthy habits going.



STARDUST2K4
Posts: 1,343
12/7/12 11:44 A

You can definitely start by not beating yourself up. When I was 330 pounds, my butt couldn't fit into a chair at a restaurant. I could have taken that opportunity to order a salad, but instead, I ordered a huge dish of salmon Alfredo. I look back at that incident and laugh at myself because I thought I so badly wanted to look good, and be healthy, yet I couldn't even make one change at dinner that night.

I have been doing this since 2009. It's been a long process consisting of weight lost and regained. The only real difference was in 2011 I decided to get counseling. Once I had a place to go and talk, I started realizing why I was overeating, and it was in 2011 that I lost about 70 pounds (I had since regained some, but for the most part I've maintained most of this year until about a month ago when I started losing again).

It seems silly. We know exactly what to do, what to eat, and how to do it, yet success seems so elusive. It sounds like you've perhaps had your 'wake up call'. Now, take that emotion and use it to help yourself work towards your goal.

As long as you don't give up, you haven't failed yet.

You can do this! Just remember it has to start with YOU. No one else can be motivated for you. No one else can want this for you more than you. Don't do this for anyone else but YOU.



USE2BWILD
Posts: 1,225
12/6/12 11:50 P

A fat kitchen = a lean will. Get rid of all unhealthy foods. Do not buy nor make them!! Stick to it. Only reward yourself when you begin to see results and make it a small reward if it is caloric rich!! Instead reward yourself with health!! You can do this!! Tell yourself you are worth it and tell others who try to sabotage you that you are allergic to fat foods!!! Go with weight watchers if you want to see results quickly. But the best thing is to eat every two hours something healthy and you won't be so quick to weaken. Write down everything you eat. Exercise every day. Get a good night of sleep every night. Love yourself for a change. You are beautiful. Now do it!! No more set backs and no more excuses. You can and you will!! Prove how fantastic and wonderful you can be!! Hugs!!



LOVEXAVIE
SparkPoints: (28,049)
Fitness Minutes: (27,231)
Posts: 1,940
12/6/12 11:44 P

I used to do that, too. I'd go to bed thinking tomorrow it'll be different and I'm going to eat well and blah-blah-blah. I'd be lucky if I didn't blow it by 10AM. Which, then, I would use as an excuse to eat everything in town since "I'd already blown it."

All I can tell you, Linda, is it CAN happen for you.

I spent most of my 40's heavy, except for the two x's when I lost 50lbs and gained it back - faster than I lost it..
Something this last time just *clicked* for me. Why this time? Heaven knows I had plenty of times / embarrassing moments / etc. that should have propelled me to action. But none did.
Looking back, I think that like you, I wanted it alright, but it just seemed so...unattainable. Always before, weight loss had been such an uphill battle and struggle and who wants that?
Who wants a life filled w/ sad, naked carrot & celery stalks and not much else??

Well, that mindset is the mindset of a dieter. No wonder it was so miserable before! If what you're doing is making you miserable, you're doing it wrong!

At some point, Linda, when you are ready, I think it will click for you, too. It really, really helps to read through all the success stories on this site. Not only for the advice & pointers you get, but just knowing someone who has gone through what you are going through and has achieved what you want to achieve makes it seem more attainable.

Tomorrow's another day, Linda. You've got great advice on all the previous posts. Take the pressure off yourself: ditch the scale for a while and just focus on eating better than you have been. Add more veggies and fruits. See how it goes. If your clothes start getting loser, you'll know you're on the right track and you can add more things to try.

Just don't stop trying.





BARB0863
SparkPoints: (6,559)
Fitness Minutes: (3,046)
Posts: 63
12/6/12 10:14 P

Linda,

You CAN do this! It does take work, as you already know. You've received some great advice, remember baby steps - one at a time. When I started mid-August I was wearing size 18 and wouldn't have thought that I would be sitting here tonight wearing a size 12! You can do this, you just need to cut yourself some slack on the bad days and be sure to give yourself the well-deserved pat on the backs on the good days (I've had both).

There is a great community here of people who want nothing more than to help you succeed on your journey. Reach out when you need to - there's bound to be someone that can offer advice, comfort or a cheer!

Barb

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Edited by: BARB0863 at: 12/6/2012 (22:14)


FIT4MEIN2013
Posts: 4,297
12/6/12 9:49 P

There were days when I wanted to overeat so bad that I literally had to run into the bathroom and look in the mirror and repeat to myself "Fat? or fit?" I repeated the phrase until I made a conscious decision. USUALLY (not always) that decision was fit. Sometimes it was fat, but it was a CONSCIOUS decision. I lost 160# doing it. It is a choice. You CAN make the right one. emoticon emoticon



TURTLESDOVE
Posts: 1,061
12/6/12 3:46 P

Linda, I feel your pain. I don't know what has happened to my will power. I lost 30 pounds last year but I've gained back at least 15 of it. It's like I have an intense desire to feel better to ward off all of this stress. I know it's only temporary, but I'm having trouble controlling my food choices. It's Christmas, and yet once again, my husband cannot find work and we can't even pay our bills, let alone give our little boy a good Christmas. I can't take it anymore. I keep being optimistic and praying constantly without ceasing, but we are still struggling. I'm sorry I've barged in on your post, but I'm with you my dear!



ARCHIMEDESII
SparkPoints: (135,753)
Fitness Minutes: (204,410)
Posts: 20,187
12/6/12 1:31 P

Linda,

You can't keep beating yourself up. You have to stop looking at weight loss or good health with an "all or nothing" mentality. Stop trying to be perfect. You don't have to be perfect to be healthy. I'm going to encourage you to continue with small changes first. take those baby steps. Don't try to do everything at once or you will continue to be frustrated. No one ever became a healthy eater overnight. It's impossible.

I know you've had problems with depression in the past. Are you working with a therapist ? I know money is tight, but talk to your doctor and see if you can get a referral to a therapist or maybe even a support group. Don't be afraid to talk to a professional. They are there to help.






CHEETARA79
SparkPoints: (71,590)
Fitness Minutes: (49,152)
Posts: 3,469
12/6/12 12:37 P

Have you considered getting therapy or counseling? Maybe you can unlock the reasons why you overeat if you talk to a professional.

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RACHELLAZARUS
Posts: 4
12/6/12 12:27 P

You're going to keep trying, that's what you're going to do with yourself.

This is really hard. Human beings are programmed from birth to associate food and comfort, and we get pleasure in eating. We are also a rebellious animal, and have the urge to eat because someone (even ourselves) told us not to. I am with you, I sabotage my efforts all the time. But each morning we log back in here and try again, and celebrate the days we succeed.

To quote one of my favorite movie lines, "It's supposed to be hard. If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great." More than 1/3 of American adults are obese and not doing anything about it. You are. So that is what makes you great.



LINDAANNB1
Posts: 437
12/6/12 12:09 P

How is it that I so desperately want t lose weight, get healthy, feel better, look better and have more confidence but yet I sabotage myself every day with food.
I have tried so many times and I just can't see to get it together. I know what I am supposed to eat and not eat and drink. I know about small steps and changes, making it a lifestlye. It's like I know exactly what I need to do, I just can't see to get on board with doing it. I am so frsutrated, disgusted, embarassed and mad at myself for letting things get this far.
I saw myself in a mirror when I was at a Christmas function last night, I was totally disgusted, you think that would be motivation enough but noooo, I just finished a healthy tuna sandwich for lunch wth a large glass of water, finished with a bag of chips and several mint patties ....
What am I going to do with myself ?



 
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