Guaranteed to make you laugh!

Posts: 7,088
3/19/05 3:28 A

lissy aka FIVEBYFIVE
Great little story!
Isn't it a sad, we finally smell the coffee!

Posts: 10,259
3/17/05 6:16 P

I am not a joke teller! would be fun to hear some funny jokes est.

We all need to laugh, good for the soul!

Aunt Bee

Posts: 10,259
2/23/05 12:31 P

Life is not all Cherries or Peaches and Gream!
Some times we eat H________ Peppers! Which comes back and burn our Fanny! ha or A____!

May all your days be filled with Cherries & Peaches n Cream! Leave the darn pepper alone!

Aunt Bee
Down 2 pounds

Edited by: AUNTBEE1945BK at: 2/23/2005 (12:32)

Posts: 10,259
2/7/05 4:12 P

Liz that was great!

Aunt Bee

Posts: 417
2/7/05 3:11 P

Hi, everyone,

A dear friend of mine sent this to me this morning
and I enjoyed it so much. Just had to share!

Enjoy! Have a beautiful day!

Hugs,

Lizzy

****************************************
*****

If my body were a car:

If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading
it in for a newer model.

I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job
is getting a little dull, but that's not the worst of it. My fenders are too
wide to be considered stylish. They were once as sleek as a little MG;
now they look more like my mother's old Buick.

My seat cushions have split open at the seams. My seats are sagging.
Seat belts? I gave up all belts when Ben &Jerry's opened a shop in my neighborhood.

Air bags? Forget it. The only bags I have these days are under my eyes.
Not counting the saddlebags. Of course I have soooooo many miles on
my odometer. Sure, I've been many places and seen many things, but
when's the last time an appraiser factored life experiences against depreciation?

My headlights are out of focus and it's especially hard to see things up
close.

My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid
and bump into things even in the best of weather.

My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me hours to
reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently.

But here's the worst of it -- almost every time I sneeze, cough or
sputter -I leak oil.

I'm so ready for a trade in! Anyone know where I can get a good deal?