Joyencar 83, I FEEL YOUR PAIN!!!!! Your current stats are where I USED to be and am desperately trying to get back to, and yes, IT IS HARD, but my new motto is "you can only take one step at a time, so take ONE STEP AT A TIME!!" I don't know any other way to say this, and I hope I don't offend anyone who reads this; God only gives you what He KNOWS you can bear, so tie a knot in the rope, hold on tight, and say "Ok, God, help me do this!!!" It works!!! I've been on my journey for a long time, too, but, I've not been as successful as I can be because I was trying to do it the wrong way. I'm learning that there WILL be times that you HAVE TO give in to that urge to binge, but you also HAVE TO forgive yourself for it; YOU'RE ONLY HUMAN!!!!! Remember, ONE DAY AT A TIME, ONE STEP AT A TIME!!!