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ERIN976 SparkPoints: (311)
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Posts: 21
5/21/13 2:39 P

Thanks everyone. I did give in to the apple turnover this morning when I woke because I was starving but as I walked from the garage to the office I noticed my stomach was really cramping up. Maybe my body is finally starting to say ick to sugar... Tonight is crispy cheddar chicken. Probably not the greatest of healthy meals because it does contain canned soup and some cheese but definitely not the worst thing. I'm also pairing it with zuchinni and tomatoes. I'm officially excited about dinner tonight.

If you don't try, you'll never know.
BUNNYKICKS Posts: 2,393
5/21/13 2:27 A

Ha, an apple-eating cat! Cute! Well, you can put your readily-available fruit bowl front-and-centre on a shelf in the fridge...

I have gone through the same experience with my spouse. He initially doesn't like it when I take steps to eat better - because he fears how it will impact *him* - he doesn't want to eat "diet food" for dinner, he wants to be able to enjoy going out to a restaurant - sooooo I had to demonstrate that it will NOT impact him (unless HE wants it to). I took the extra time to prep meals that would suit both of us... and did so while showing ZERO signs of resentment at the extra work or the lack of support. And... He did come around after a while... once he realized he was not going to be "forced" into anything, and that I had absolutely NO expectation that he would join me on my journey and was not judging him for it, not pressuring or even encouraging him to "get on board"... it was THEN that he started showing signs of interest.... go figure! I guess people instinctively balk at "having" to do things.... and on the flip-side, instinctively want to be included in doing things, when they are being left out!

Goal 1 - break 200 (46 pounds lost)**DONE**
Goal 2 - leave obesity behind (BMI 29.9, at 185#) **DONE**
Goal 3 - BMI = Normal (154# or less)
ERIN976 SparkPoints: (311)
Fitness Minutes: (0)
Posts: 21
5/20/13 3:16 P

I would love nothing more than to have fruit out and available... but we have animals who think that our food is theirs. I have a cat who actually loves apples and will nibble on them if they're on the counter and a dog who thinks that all carrots in the house are for him!

If you don't try, you'll never know.
FEDGIRL4 Posts: 2,097
5/20/13 2:59 P

I have been in a true weight loss search for 12 years.

I started Spark 3-1/2 years ago. My hubby has been very supportive but has not eaten the healthiest until recently. He still grabs a bag of Cheetos or a Checkers burger every once in a while but not regularly anymore.

We bought girl scout cookies. He had his Do-Si-Does and Thin Mints. I had Thank You Berry Much, Dulce De Leche, and Savannah Smiles. When I bought them, I packaged his and gave them to him to take to work. He is self-employed and owns a food carryout. He looked at me and asked, "Why do I have to take everything to work. Why can't I have something here?!"

I realized he was right. I was so scared that I would take it and blame him for leaving it here. I have gotten to the point that I can leave his stuff. I am now confident in my own self.

If your hubby joins you, he does. If he doesn't, you can't force him. You may also get to the point that you can not be tempted by his food.

Life is not waiting for the storms to's learning to dance in the rain.

"The only disability in life is a bad attitude." - Scott Hamilton

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ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (159,423)
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Posts: 23,209
5/20/13 2:19 P


What you might do is put out a big bowl of fruit so that the both of you can grab a snack whenever you'd like. He may munch on it if he doesn't feel pressured to do so. Also, if he loves popcorn, there is absolutely no reason the both of you can't enjoy a nice bowl of air popped popcorn. Newmans Own Lite microwave popcorn is really good. That might be a good compromise i.e. munching on popcorn while watching a movie together.


ERIN976 SparkPoints: (311)
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Posts: 21
5/20/13 2:08 P

Archimedes, Thank you!!!! Thats it exactly! I left a comment on your SP page but what I'm really going to do is start bringing out the healthy foods when he brings out the junk. He likes a lot of fruits and vegetables, he just never thinks of eating them when its "snack" time.

If you don't try, you'll never know.
KENDILYNN SparkPoints: (12,806)
Fitness Minutes: (18,027)
Posts: 996
5/20/13 2:01 P

Could you try explaining to him that this is how you intend to "enjoy life"? If he thinks you are denying yourself life's pleasures and only eating boring "diet" food that you don't even enjoy, it's no wonder he doesn't think it will make you happy. I eat pretty healthy, but I don't eat anything I dislike just because it's healthy. I love cooking and I love healthy food, but if I reallly want a treat, I let myself have it. I can't imagine anyone who loves you not supporting that once they understand. If he still chooses not to join you, maybe you can ask him not to bring your biggest trigger foods into the house. My husband knows if he wants to buy ice cream, to buy one of the many flavors I don't prefer. If I really want ice cream, I'll buy a single serving of my favorite flavor, but I don't want the rest of the carton tempting me tomorrow. Good luck!

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (159,423)
Fitness Minutes: (235,580)
Posts: 23,209
5/20/13 1:54 P

Hi, Erin !

What you're experiencing with your hubby isn't unusual. Unfortunately, too many members have spouses who aren't interested in losing weight. just yet.

Here's the thing, you can't force someone to eat healthy. How many times were we told we needed to eat right and lose weight before we decided to do something ? well, for now, you have to do what's right for YOU. This is your journey and for now, it has to be separate from your hubby's. It would be great if our significant others wanted to join us on our journey. But don't take their rejection personally.

For now, you set the example. You eat the salads and veggies because it's something you want to do. You might even want to pick out veggies your hubby enjoys so that he doesn't feel you're eating right to spite him. He's rebeling because he thinks you're going to take away his apple turn overs in favor of rabbit food. With time, as you eat more healthfully, he'll learn that good food can and does taste good.

Let him join you when he's ready. Don't try to force him to eat healthy or he will rebel. Buy fruit the both of you will enjoy so that he doesn't feel pressured. Be patient with him. You'd be surprized how many spouses decide to eat better when they see how well their wives/hubbies are doing.

ERIN976 SparkPoints: (311)
Fitness Minutes: (0)
Posts: 21
5/20/13 1:47 P

Thats what got me to give up soda but I'm still having a hard time with the foods. I know I feel better physically when I eat healthier but I don't equate the pain with the food yet. Maybe I haven't eaten healthy for long enough to notice the stomach cramps. I was going to try going sugar free but theres no way I can avoid it. I still without thinking about it pour myself some honey nut cheerios in the morning... not that thats awful but its not a good start to my day.

If you don't try, you'll never know.
STARDUST2K4 Posts: 1,358
5/20/13 1:41 P

That can definitely be frustrating. The fact that those foods make you feel terrible should be what keeps you strong and prevents you from eating those foods that he brings home.

My fiance is supportive, but he didn't choose to change his eating habits as I did. He still eats chips, cheez its, cakes, and all kinds of things that I swore off because they make my stomach hurt. Knowing that those foods will physically hurt me are what keep me from giving in and eating them. Keep in mind that you can't force him to do it with you, but maintain your ground and do it so he knows that you're serious.

You can do this!

Don't ever let anyone else tell you who you can be

ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (132,468)
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Posts: 14,010
5/20/13 1:41 P

Let him eat the junk. You don't have to.

"Sometimes the moments that challenge us the most, define us." - Deena Kastor

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ERIN976 SparkPoints: (311)
Fitness Minutes: (0)
Posts: 21
5/20/13 1:33 P

My DH refuses to support me in this. He says my weight is fine and I should just enjoy life. This week I came home with salads and veggies, he promptly drove himself to the store and came home with apple turnovers and three gallons of ice cream. How do I get him to understand that even if my weight isn't "overweight" that I'm not happy. These foods make me feel like (expletive) and I am tired and not happy with the way I feel about my body. I want to do this for all of us. I want my family to be healthy. We both come from long lines of diabetics. I don't want that in our future.

If you don't try, you'll never know.
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