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BABIES46143 SparkPoints: (10,781)
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2/2/11 9:05 A

We have ran into this problem my ring is in layaway at jarads and my band I am not willing to change it is perfect but, I am willing to make the diamond in the middle smaller. The economy is not working for us right now so we can always upgrade it later on is the way I look at it.

1/31/11 4:28 A

Like a lot of others on here, I also have small hands - my new fiance wanted to get me a 1 carat diamond with platinum band. We looked at a few, and they just looked far too big for my little fingers. In the end we went for a trilogy ring - same carat weight, but smaller, more delicate, and far cheaper than a single 1ct stone would have been. I'm very happy, it looks lovely, not too big to wear every day (but I'm about to go and work in a hospital, so won't be able to :( ), and he's happy that he knows he's given me something special.

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1/28/11 9:56 A

I got a $200 gold and lab created alexandrite ring, custom made on by a local artist. It is PERFECT in every way. It suits who we are as a couple, unique and always changing (the stone changes from green to red to purple depending on the light).

Size, and even stone, do not matter. Its all about who YOU are and what YOU want :)

SOON2BMRSKIRK SparkPoints: (0)
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1/26/11 4:01 P

I agree size shouldn't matter. I prefer 1 caret or about that.(which is what I got in the engagement ring) When B and I went ring shopping I was told to find what I liked. He asked me to try on bigger rings(3 carets and more) I told him I would to make him happy to see them but that is way too big for me. B and I do live comfortably and he has a great job, but I didn't want him going in debt or paying on a ring for years to come over MY ring when his ring is easily paid for in one paycheck. So when he proposed I got a 1 caret princess cut diamond with small diamonds around it(vintage setting) and small diamonds on the band. The wedding band is smaller diamonds(that match the engagement ring) that wrap around the engagement ring. All together I believe it's 1.5 caret and beautiful quality and color. I have never asked how much he got on the deal because I know how much it was that day, but he has assured me that he has not gone in debt for this, it was paid for when he walked out of the store and that we will be fine. To me it means the world he got my opinion on it, he researched the color, quality, etc.. and that he chose this ring for ME. I love it and it looks way bigger than it is because of how it sparkles. It is my dream ring.

BRIDEJEN Posts: 55
1/26/11 3:07 A

I would absolutely under no circumstances be upset about the ring my fiancé picked. He took time out of his life to work harder to save up the money, research diamonds, jewelers, metals, and to guess at my ring size since I do not wear much jewelry. The only thing that matters to me is that he loves me for the rest of his life and shows his love for me whenever he can. I am all about the simple things. My tires were low last week. I went to put more air in them but the air compressor at the gas station was broken. He took my car out and drove around until he found a gas station with an air pump that worked. When I have a really bad day he will do something sweet like buy me a flower so make me smile. The ring doesn't matter, all that matters is how he treats me... And boy does he treat me good!!!

CCAR414 Posts: 66
1/26/11 1:36 A

I became engaged to my fiancé when I was in school and he was making a lot less money. He bought my ring off a co-worker, who was in debt for some seedy reasons. So basically, my ring had a past, but I loved him and so what because we were both dead broke! Well, I could not imagine how many sneers i got from people for a 1/2 carat round cut diamond. People I never thought would be materialistic were very rude about my ring. It was awful. I asked my fiancé if we could upgrade my ring now that we make pretty good money since finishing school, but mostly because I wanted to pick it out and get something that was not someone else's ring. It really amazes how people gawk over my new ring, and now almost treat our engagement like it's real. I am sure there are a lot of women out there who would be married by now if there wasn't such a hangup over rings.

Edited by: CCAR414 at: 1/26/2011 (01:37)
RMARIE87 Posts: 360
1/25/11 7:38 P

I found my ring at Overstock. I chose it because I loved the look/feel of the band (a very "antique" style). A lot of young women I graduated with seemed to prefer the huge rock, but I didn't really want to have to struggle to move my left hand, lol.

CHARITYLOVE79 SparkPoints: (0)
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1/25/11 5:00 P

i prefer a smaller stone and not necessarily diamonds.

1/25/11 4:46 P

I just recently became engaged, and was very surprised by the ring my fiancee proposed with. We hadn't discussed rings much, as I kind of felt that would be presumptuous and a little tacky, but he knew that I did not want or expect him to buy me an expensive ring.

Well, my ring is beautiful. It has one large diamond in the centre and two small ones on the sides. I know it cost him a fair chunk of change, but that's what he really wanted. I feel weird wearing this expensive thing to work and around town, but it was his way of showing his love and commitment, so what can I do. I'll just wear it and treasure it and be VERY CAREFUL not to lose it!

At least I know that he saved for it and paid upfront - the last thing we need to start our life together is debt from a piece of jewellery!

XANDUNCAN SparkPoints: (0)
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1/25/11 11:34 A

I am the opposite as well. I want a ring that is no larger than 1.99 carats (MAXIMUM - I prefer around 1 carat). I picked out a very simple setting that was $450, but he's holding off on buying anything because he wants a larger ring...more towards the 2 carat size. It can be kind of frustrating. I know that he just wants me to have the best there is, but at the same time, he IS the best there is, and I just want him.

BEXLUV Posts: 71
1/23/11 2:48 P

My fiance was really clear on the fact that he wanted to get me 'something different'. He propsed without a ring, and in the end we decided that by getting a different stone, the ring would look great (I have big hands!) but without the price tag! My beautiful pink sapphire and diaond ring is perfect. Best of all, we bought it second hand from ebay! It's got it's certificates and we had to have it resized, but it cost a fraction of the price. Size never mattered to me, but it just proves that if you look in the right places you can get something amazing nice and cheap! And i love it soooo much - it's even inspired the grey, silver and pink colour scheme for the whole wedding! :)

LIL_RAX SparkPoints: (0)
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1/21/11 10:03 A

i've never really put much credence into the size of the ring. as a matter of fact, i didnt even require a ring for the proposal. i'm marrying HIM not the ring

STACILYNN9765 Posts: 20
1/20/11 4:20 P

When my fiancee proposed to me and pulled out a beautiful ring I cried. Then he told me it was the ring his father (who passed in a car accident about 14 years ago) had given his mother for their 20th wedding anniversary right before his death; at that I bawled. He got it fitted and restored for me. To me it is always the meaning, the love. You cant place value on that.

MRSSKS SparkPoints: (0)
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1/19/11 8:29 P

NO, well not to me. My fiancee bought me a ring that cost him only $120. I told him to not spend a lot of money on it. After we got engaged, I went to my Mammaw and asked her if I could use my Great-Grandmother's wedding ring set for myself. She said yes. The ring is not even a 1/2 crt. But you know what it is the MEANING! I loved my Great-Grandmother. And her ring from the 1950s suits me more then some 21 century ring ever will. Every time I look at my ring I think of her and my fiancee. Two of the Most Important people to me. With Her gone and not being to be at my Wedding it means 10x's more to me to have her ring. I hope this helps yall. to hear my ring's story. :)

1/18/11 9:14 A

Ugh, I HATE HATE HATE these kinds of reactions. If a woman feels its a good idea to go into debt before you even take your vows just so she can show off some bling, then she's crazy. If she's going to belittle a man who loves her because the rock on her hand isn't big enough, then she's cruel. Sure, one can blame deBeers and the diamond industry in general for making women think that big diamonds are necessary, but frankly that's just a cop out. If a woman is getting engaged, then she should be mature enough to think for herself and not get sucked into the hype.

In my case, I didn't pick out my own ring (my FI did). I had mentioned prior to the proposal that if he ever did propose, that I didn't believe a diamond was necessary at all and that he could feel free to propose without one if he so wished. In the end, he proposed with a gorgeous ring that did have a diamond, albeit a tiny one (1/4 carat) that he had come from his mother's engagement ring so that a) it had sentimental value, and b) he didn't have to pay extra for it. I think this was the best decision in our situation and its absolutely perfect.

So, if a couple is wealthy enough where they can afford a large diamond ring, then by all means get it. But I just hate how some women seem to act like the ring is more important than the proposal itself.

Edited by: LISA_GEEDELETE at: 1/19/2011 (21:40)
WATCH_HER_GO SparkPoints: (17,111)
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1/17/11 9:56 P

When my fiance first showed me a ring he liked for me, it was a simple band with a single 1 carat diamond. It was simple; I liked it. When he proposed, though, it was a totally different ring with a lot of small, really sparkly diamonds. He says the total is about 1 carat, but I feel like it looks like more.

It is a beautiful ring (there is a pic on my spark page), but I was really self-conscious about wearing it at first because it's very "blingy." I especially felt bad wearing it around my clients who are all lower-income families. I know this ring cost more than some of them make in a few months of work.

I'm feeling much more comfortable with it now, though.

SCTK519 Posts: 2,086
1/15/11 8:44 P

No, it doesn't. If it does, you may want to reconsider. I know my fiance went a slight step up from what he had planned on due to how the diamond looked in the setting; he said a smaller diamond didn't look as nice, but to me it would have made no difference.

FOREVER1109 SparkPoints: (0)
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1/15/11 9:03 A

size does not matter at all and neither does the price. it should be about the love two people share not whats on their finger.

MPOMEROY Posts: 46
1/13/11 2:06 P

My ring is sterling silver, CZ, with a simple, but beautiful setting. Since it was less expensive than a diamond, my fiance got a larger carat for the stone. I love it, however, the stone is so large that people are constantly asking me if it's real!

How rude of them! I always reply with, "It's a real engagement ring, if that's what you meant." It doesn't matter to me if the stone is a real diamond (I actually prefer it this way, as we are paying for the whole wedding ourselves and I'd like to save every penny), so I don't see why it should matter to my coworkers or classmates if my fiance bought me a real diamond.

PIPSIG5 Posts: 189
1/12/11 10:58 A

No the size of the ring does not matter. The most important thing is that it looks great on the finger/hand of the one who wears it!

1/10/11 8:17 P

I'm in healthcare and a huge ring gets in the way and is a hazard for my patients. The ring I have gets so many compliments people say they think its more carats than what it really is just because its about 60 small diamonds and boy does it sparkle!

STARQUEG SparkPoints: (0)
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1/10/11 3:08 A

With my tiny hands, a huge ring would look ridiculous. That said, I have a three stone amethyst ring that I picked out. I'm not into diamonds, and purple is my favorite color. People who know me think it's the perfect ring for me, people who don't know me, well, their opinion really doesn't matter. I sometimes wonder if people won't realize it's an engagement ring, but I know it is, and that's what's important. My wedding band will be a plain gold band, and his might have etching in it. We're not fancy people. I'm going to be working with kids all day, and big rocks just sound like they'll get in the way and get dirty. Of course, I'm well aware that I'm not often the norm in this world.

SUGAREE_1202 Posts: 90
1/6/11 9:59 P

The diamond size really didn't matter to me as long as it looked good in the setting but it did take some convincing to get my now fiance to stop trying to figure out how we could get a 2 carat diamond. He was pretty insistent on getting me a nice big rock until I blatantly told him that I would not be walking around with a ring worth several months rent when we have two small children to take care of, I'm not even working until I graduate in May and we're paying for the wedding ourselves. (I can't say if our situation was different that I would have convinced him to buy me a smaller ring though, and probably won't complain if he wants to buy me a big diamond ring in the future when we're more stable financially)

The setting ended up being the biggest issue. We had fallen in love with a halo setting with a twisted band the first time we went ring shopping but the setting alone was way out of our price range. We eventually found the perfect "twisty band" ring online with a .65 carat center stone, lots of little side stones and it was also way below budget ( they also have beautiful, affordable wedding bands). I love my ring and, like everyone else has mentioned, what's most important is what it means to us!

1/6/11 8:25 P

i picked out my engagement ring from the white gold carot weight to the diamond that met my specifications. i am in the medical profession and my colleages wear a friggin boulder on their fingers and that to me is too much. i opted for an almost flawless .5 carot diamond with good cut and color and when its closely looked at it is dazzling where as when i get a close look at their rings its like a graveyard in there, there are so many inclusions and even cracks! but the best part is my fiancee paid a small price for the ring compared to my colleagues and he paid it in cash! so we have no debt hanging over our heads when we finally tie the knot.

we knew before the ring that we were going to get married so we started planning the wedding and setting aside money so when i found something reasonable that i wanted it was a go.

CHRISSI_MK Posts: 109
1/6/11 2:30 P

I don't think the size matters at all and I don't think it should even for people who can afford huge diamonds. I agree that it should be more about finding something that it a fit for the womman.

MY first husband gave me a beautiful ring and it meant nothing. (I gave it back by the way) When I saw it I thought it was really pretty but to be honest the wow factor was way more with my fiance and the delicate ring he bought.

I told my fiance that I wouldn't even care if the stone is real or fake. We went for a sapphire and I love it. It was not the most expensive ring that he could afford but it was the most beautiful.

Edited by: CHRISSI_MK at: 1/6/2011 (14:33)
JENNA617 SparkPoints: (0)
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1/6/11 7:58 A

The size of the ring shouldn't matter, though I know it does to alot of women. I was happy enough that my fiance wanted to marry me and the ring he picked was perfect for me. Though it may not be extravagant or flashy, it's perfect to me. He actually listened...for once lol!

AELWYN Posts: 67
1/5/11 12:11 A

I was really worried my fiance was going to buy something HUGE (I like small rings), and a large diamond. I prefer gemstones.

When he proposed (I had no idea he was going to--I thought he was going to in a few years), I got a gorgeous emerald ring in white gold with 32 tiny diamonds around it and one the band, in a vintage setting. It is PERFECT.

It's not big or flashy, and doesn't get caught on anything (the problem with big rings), and fits my small hands well. :D

I'm glad I made it clear that I like SMALL rings.

JLS523 Posts: 294
1/4/11 4:20 P

My fiancé and I are both in grad school so we don't have a lot of money. I told him that I didn't need a ring right now as I'd be happy to wear the plain band he gave me a few years ago or that I'd like a white sapphire instead of a diamond but he insisted on buying a diamond. I already knew that I wanted a one stone ring so he went to a jewelery store and said I want a one stone ring with a white gold 3mm wide band where the diamond is a low set as possible and I want to pay (this) much taxes and all. Do what you can.

I LOVE my ring. Do I eventually want a larger ring? Yes, but only when we can afford it. And I don't want to get rid of the one I have now. I want to take the stone out and set it in a three stone setting with other diamonds.

I think that if you don't want to marry a person because you don't like the ring they gave you then you probably shouldn't be marrying that person in the first place.

ERHARMON Posts: 36
1/2/11 6:12 P

my fiance just gave me his the stones from his moms band who passed away a few years ago. I had wanted a big stone, and this one is very small. but when he gave it to me and told me what it was, I fell in love with it immediately and wouldn't trade it for any other diamond. I think you're right, its just what you want in a ring that matters!

HOLALOLA SparkPoints: (32,620)
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1/2/11 3:36 P

I wasn't sure I wanted a ring at all when we first started looking. I don't wear jewelry so all the big diamonds we looked at just looked out of place and didn't feel like me. I was driving around one weekend in my sports clothes and just couldn't imaging doing it while wearing diamonds!

He kept urging me toward a bigger rock because we live in a snobby town and thought people would think less of him if he got me something smaller. But I explained it to him and he understood. (I also volunteered to explain it to anyone who might look down.)

We picked a beautiful ring that we both like that doesn't have any diamonds and it was from a store that sort of meant something to us.

But for some people, the ring is everything.

ER1KALYNN081 Posts: 20
12/30/10 11:19 P

I didn't mean it in that sense I should've worded it different I feel that if people ar focused on the size of the ring they lose focus of what really matters. Obviously those who are financially stable and who can afford to do that and want to is totally different that what I was trying to pinpoint. I see people like myself who are young and not financially stable dwelling on the size of a ring and like I have seen people get mad at their fiance for not getting a big enough ring which I feel is a sure sign that maybe they aren't as focused on the relationship and the whole meaning behind it...

I didn't mean to offend anyone by how I worded that, I meant to focus on those who are unappreciative and are more materialistic than anything

JSN928 SparkPoints: (0)
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12/30/10 10:57 P

I think this totally depends on the couple. My fiance and I are financially stable. We are 29 and 34, and have both been working professional jobs for a long time. We can afford to give each other nice things, and he chose to buy me a beautiful engagement ring. I never specified the size he needed to get me (just that I wanted a simple round solitaire.) But, it made him happy to "wow" me and if we can afford it, why not? I think the size of the ring depends on the couple and their style and preferences. What "wowed" me might totally turn another woman off. What others love might not be my style at all.

But, in the end the size of the ring has no indication of whether or not it will be a happy marriage - that's a whole different issue.

ER1KALYNN081 Posts: 20
12/30/10 9:45 P

I feel too many people now a days dwell more on the ring than what it is symbolizing! It is a symbol of your fiance's love and desire to spend the rest of your lives together, not how much he is willing to shovel out for that huge carat ring. My fiance and I had been discussing marriage for a while and we went to look at rings together so he could get an idea of what I liked. And when the day finally came he proposed and I am in love with the ring that he gave me because it was from him i wasn't worried about its size. So I feel people who are more concerned with ring size may not really be in it for the marriage or they are too damn materialistic

ELLELEANN Posts: 310
12/29/10 8:58 P

My boyfriend's mother is just like this! He took me to pick out the ring because he wanted me to be happy with it. I wanted a three-stone ring, but I have small hands, so I picked out one that was proportional. I love it! It was less than half the price from any of the three-stone rings I looked at in stores, and I can't imagine finding one I like better. His mom, however, is so snooty about it. When we first got it she told him that he needed to give me something nicer, it wasn't big enough. He told her to lay off, but she still frequently makes comments about it being a nice promise ring.

It's so hard to believe people sometimes. Society should never decide someone else's happiness and love.

12/29/10 8:06 A

I would think that the proposal indicates thought... Or the life you have lived together before the proposal is full of moments which indicate thought.

Every morning, he wakes up just a bit earlier than me and makes me a cup of coffee because he knows how much I hate the mornings. And when I have had a long day at work, he will have a cup of tea waiting for me and a nice hot bath ready for me to climb in. He always gives me his robe because it's bigger and softer than mine.

My fiancee bought me a ring that cost him about £180 ($280). But as I said before, it was exactly what I wanted in every way... Had he spent £3,000 on an engagement ring I probably would have been a bit upset that he didn't know me better or take me into consideration when choosing it.

The "size" or "cost" of the ring doesn't matter.

12/28/10 1:53 A

I honestly don't think the size of the ring should matter. If you love the person and he loves you it should not matter what size of diamond you have - what means most is he wants to spend the rest of his life with you. My fiancée got me a small cute diamond and honestly I am very happy with it. It's a nice cut and simple, I like the fact that it does not over power my hand.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,406
12/27/10 11:01 P

I agree about the Fair Trade aspect. There are jewelry stores that claim to sell fair trade diamonds.

And if a guy saved his money or put it on layaway. Then a nice ring would be ok. Not too big, because my hands are small and big rings look conspicuous.

I don't want a ring that was put on a credit card. (unless the bill was paid when it came a month later) or financed. His finances will become my finances and I don't believe in living above my means.

I am older than some of you and stuff doesn't really matter to me anymore.

AOGOAE Posts: 4,073
12/27/10 3:00 P

Well, no it doesn't matter...but
For one thing, a crappy diamond can be 4x larger than a good one and cost much less. I want QUALITY not quantity.
Second, simulated is starting to be the way to go. It is difficult to find a diamond that is certified fair trade, and I wouldn't wear something that wasn't.

But in another way, it does matter. A nice diamond indicates thought. That this man had actually planned to marry you for many months- maybe years- and saved his money to do so. He sacrificed something he wanted to save the money for something that was symbolic of his affection and committment to you. THAT is why bigger is better. Of course this is relative- a lawyer would have to spend much more money for it to be a sacrifice and indicate prior planning, vs. a police officer or student.
If he can show these things in another way (like using a family heirloom that he had to ask half a dozen people for and get resized, or picking out a perfect non-traditional ring that was just your style)- then size doesn't matter.

12/27/10 2:37 P

I think my (now) fiancee was so pleased when I told him I didn't want a diamond. I wanted something unique and personal- an opal. He got me a beautiful marquise cut opal engagement ring set in 14kt yellow gold and I couldn't be happier with it.

Also, it cost him about as much as an expensive night out on the town for two.


12/26/10 3:18 P

I'm in the middle with this. I'm young and don't need a monster of a diamond. But at the same time, I'm not very materialistic. I don't want/like designer clothing, labels mean nothing to me. I shop at target or where ever the clothes fit me with a reasonable price, etc. Though the one nice thing I want is a nice ring. Me and my then boyfriend went to Shaneco and looked at prices and rings to get an idea of what we like.

We went online to and found a diamond that was good for the price and everything we wanted and more. For some reason Nicks credit of 740 wasn't good enough for bluenile to finance the diamond (though we did just get a new car a month before this), so Nick went to our bank to try and get a private loan for the diamond and again got denied.

I am so lucky to have him, he just wants to do whatever it takes to make me happy. Though it was about the ring to me more than the stone in the middle. So with that being said I told him I would rather find a shaneco diamond I really loved, and that one day we could trade up for our anniversary down the road if that's what we wanted to do.

Well with out wanting to try financing at another place, we decided to pick out a ice blue 1.10ct stone for the middle of my ring and wait till I found the diamond I wanted. It took me over 2 months for me to find one I wanted, When we saw it, we decided that was the one, the price was spot on, and we put it on lay away. Made it so the last payment will be right before the wedding and I will have my diamond when we get married, but this way we can always get the money back with no fee, we don't pay any interest, and I still have a really pretty ring on my finger. Oh and the ice blue sapphire will be traded in as the last payment for the diamond. Shane co is amazing where as any piece of jewelry bought from them, you can use the price that you paid for it (before tax) as a credit for a different piece of jewelry, as long as its 1$ more than the item you are trading in. Win-Win

Edited by: STACYDRAPER at: 12/26/2010 (15:19)
K_ROSALEE06 Posts: 17
12/23/10 4:52 P

The size of the ring/diamond or whatever so does not matter! Well to me anyways. I recently just got engaged and I love my new ring! Unfortunately something went wrong with the sizing...The jeweler sized me at a size 8 and when I got the ring, (a size 8) it didn't fit! I was so bummed.

But anyways, I wanted a small diamond, idk what size it actually is, but it looks beautiful and is so perfect for me. Who would want a huge gaudy expensive ring that me be the best ring in the world...but would get caught on everything and would be a horrible thing to lose. I am already scared of losing my ring, but could you imagine losing one that cost thousands of dollars? My heart would sink.

It's the thought of the ring that counts, not the size of it.

NYXWOLFWALKER SparkPoints: (167,832)
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12/23/10 4:10 P

Eyes my wedding ring ... counts the carrots ... whops can't count the carrots as its got 0 carrots to count or stones for that matter

My e-ring has some kind of diamond in it that I haven't got a clue about, all I know is that N chose it for me and it fit my finger and I've worn it all of 5 times since he gave it to me (I preferred the matching e-rings we got sized for us in plain silver, fits my style much better - just like our wedding rings, plain and simple and we didn't go into debt for them [total cost of both rings 80 bucks]).

LAURAGUY12 Posts: 594
12/22/10 2:11 P

I'm a little in the middle - while I want to have a gorgeous ring and want to show it off, I do not in any way want my fiance to go into debt because of it/me.
We went out and looked at rings a couple months before he proposed so I could show him what I liked. I currently have a 1 carat round diamond solitaire sitting on my ring finger, in white gold (exactly what I wanted). The diamond was actually already in the family and his mother gave it to him for my ring. It means alot and I'm thrilled.
My wedding band is actually a wrap-guard type ring that has small diamonds (1/4cw) and almost "slips" into my solitaire. He paid everything off and didn't go into debt for any of it.
I love it.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,406
12/17/10 6:17 P

I agree with you, Elfitzpa. I couldn't imagine putting off marrying the man that I love, just so that I could have a ridiculously expensive ring.

I like Tiffany and Co jewelry, but it is not something I must have.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 12/17/2010 (18:18)
ELFITZPA Posts: 1,455
12/15/10 4:21 P

One of my college roommates (now long since married with a toddler) moved in with her then-boyfriend and quickly started sulking about him taking too long to propose. When he pointed out that he'd need some extra time to afford the ring she wanted (something ludicrously expensive from Tiffany's), she agreed and promptly stopped bothering him for awhile!! How awful is that?! I can't imagine being willing to put off marrying the man I love just to get a fancier ring. ICK.

JAE98301 Posts: 77
12/15/10 3:43 P

This is a great topic. My fiance wants me to have a ring i am extremely happy with, and I was interested in getting a black onyx ring because black diamonds are so are expensive period. I happened to start over again on spark people and see an advertisement for diamond nexus labs. Ok, so they are manmade diamonds that will CUT one will ever know it's not real and my honey wants to replace it with a real diamond as soon as we are more financially stable. We have a 3 yr old and after we are married in June we want to have another child. Diamonds are not as important as our family or upgrading from an apartment to a house to live in. I just love the look of this ring and can't wait to get it! (He wanted my help in picking it out bc he wants me to be happy with first he told me to pick my top three and then he just wanted to make sure I was happy...he's been stalling because he has no idea what I would love-especially since this is my second wedding and he knows my last ring was $3000 and platinum-he also knows my ex was able to get it because he won a law suit for an accident he had...) I'm happy to see him worry a bit, but he should know that I'm just happy to get my wedding band and have him say i do at the end of that long walk down the aisle! :)

RDFIELDS SparkPoints: (3,505)
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Posts: 40
12/15/10 12:50 P

Maybe I have it made. While my fiancee would love a very nice ring, I'm sure. She doesn't want one. We do not have a lot of money, and there are so many other things that we could use the money for. As such, we have talked about possibly getting better rings for an anniversary or something later. For now, we're getting rings we like that we can afford. The engagement ring, rather than being expensive, is something that I know she loves that has meaning to her.

CARADAWN Posts: 1,955
12/15/10 7:56 A

I'm in the exact opposite situation! I love my husband but we are drastically different when it comes to material things. I was brought up to be very modest and he was brought up to show off. We shopped for rings together and found the perfect set. The diamond was a good size and it was everything I wanted. I knew he would not be buying the ring from the store but have it made by a family friend and I thought this meant the ring would just be an exact replica of the one in the store (size and all).

When he proposed it was the same exact setting as the ring in the store - with a lot larger diamonds. The ring is beautiful and it is exactly what I wanted except for the size. How do you tell a guy it is too big especially since he was so excited to give it to me because he works extremely hard for his money (no family money or monetary help from his parents) and was proud that he could give me such a nice ring.

Now, two years after our wedding, I only wear the engagement ring when we are going out. I wear my wedding band daily but I think the other ring is just too much for work, running errands, etc (and I don't like wearing a sign that says "Rob me please").

Pretty much what I am trying to say is it's not always the girl. Sometimes it is the guy that likes big, nice things. For me it truly is the thought that counts.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 17,406
12/14/10 9:11 P

If my guy gave me a smaller ring, but it was paid for and he didn't have to go into debt. I would like that a lot.

If he had to go into debt to get me a larger ring. I would not like that at all.

I also have small hands and thin fingers so a large ring looks odd.

Edited by: MANDIETERRIER1 at: 12/27/2010 (23:02)
AR1408 Posts: 49
12/14/10 8:56 P

I currently work in a jewelry store. It amazes me, how often women are dissatisfied with the size of the ring their future spouse picks out for them. One guy came in with his soon-to-be fiance to show her a ring. She picks out an identical ring, only in 14k white gold with a fully carat worth of diamonds (drastically more expensive than the 10k 1/4 carat he'd picked out). She acted very sullen when he told her she'd have to wait a little longer before he could afford it.

Another lady came in with a ring her husband had bought her, a diamond anniversary band. It was a half carat and she was looking for 1/3 (which we don't carry). She was very adament about returning it for a band with a larger carat weight.

One guy came in to buy a ring, and ended up with a simulated diamond bridal set (absolutely gorgeous, sterling silver, CZ). Some of my co-workers were commenting snottily on his choice, and how they'd laugh their boyfriend out of the room for something like that.

I think that's just crappy, and it really gets under my skin. My boyfriend and I are discussing engagement, and I want a smaller stone in a simple setting (I'll be working in the woods 80% of the time, for starters, and also just prefer not to walk around with over $300 worth of metal and rock on my hand). But frankly, I'd be thrilled no matter what he picked, because I know he did it to show our love.

So my question is, would any of you adamently insist that your soon to be husbands buy you a bigger ring?

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