I've tried working out with others, but I find that more often than not, it robs me of the workout that I need - for example, they're ready to walk just 2 miles into our run and I can see my plan of a 6-mile run disappear before my eyes.
So at this point, I have a couple of rules/standards for working out with friends: 1. We're doing a class together or 2. They're stronger/faster than I am (because I'm the type that pushes to meet their standard instead of making them slow down/stop early)
If the buddy doesn't meet one of those two standards, I may still go for friend time, but with the knowledge that it's extra activity rather than a piece of my standard routine.
(The one exception to this rule is the hubby; he's trying to build up his running after years of focusing on weight training, and I enjoy the active time with him, even if he runs out of steam after 3 miles and we need to walk home.)
I workout by myself usually. I go to more classes at my gym than just using a machine, and feel like I put more effort into the workout when I don't know anyone else in the class. I have had friends join me, but then I am always worried that they'll not be able to see the instructor so I spend my time focusing on them and not my actual workout.
I enjoy outdoor exercise with friends though, like group sports or something like rollerblading, going for walks, etc.
Fitness Minutes: (5,811)
83 2/11/13 11:58 A
I do it alone! I know buddies work for some, but this way is working for me now!
Fitness Minutes: (4,592)
93 2/11/13 11:12 A
I workout alone but wish at times that I had a workout buddy. Most of my workouts are at home with dvd's and when I can get outside to exercise I do some walking.
Fitness Minutes: (34,444)
559 2/11/13 11:11 A
Been working out with a buddy for the past 4 weeks straight. He's leaving town later this week so I'm hoping I can keep up the motivation on my own.
Fitness Minutes: (21,051)
616 2/11/13 10:49 A
I work out alone in the mornings and try to avoid the stares from my children (I mentally tell myself that they're saying "great job mom!" instead of "do you realize how hilarious you look trying those poses?"). At lunch I tend to work out alone but there are others at my gym that are starting to chat with me since I'm there almost every day during the week. At night and on the weekends I love working out with friends. We have a blast with Zuma and the rope ladders!!!
i tend to do most of my running alone, but i wish i could work out with a partner more often... i excel at convinicing myself that its o.k. to skip a workout, or that i'm too tired, that the weather is too bad (insert any number of excuses here). when there is a partner or workout buddy there is an accountability factor. when i've made plans to meet someone at the gym, i always go, even if i'm not feeling well or would otherwise skip it
Sometimes I work out alone other times I'll do something with someone. My mom and I joined the gym together, so we'll go together but we really don't talk much at all besides the first few minutes. Going to the gym is still intimidating at times so it is nice to have someone there that I know. :) At home I do DVD's by myself... if I walk then someone may come with me. I used to take my dog with me for walks/runs but he passed away this winter...I definitely miss him coming along! I run by myself now
Fitness Minutes: (5,504)
119 2/11/13 10:26 A
It all depends on the day. Three days a week I work out with someone. The other days, I work out alone.
Fitness Minutes: (27,653)
144 2/11/13 9:31 A
I work out alone, sort of. When I'm lifting or running, its just me and my iPod. However, I do take group classes so I guess I'm working out with a 'buddy' -LOL. Seriously, I find I can be more focused on what I'm doing, my progress, be on my schedule versus worried about others. Plus, I used to work out with someone and they didn't want to try new things so I felt a bit stifled.
Fitness Minutes: (62,643)
263 2/11/13 8:19 A
My husband is my gym buddy, in that we often go there together and have a "mini date" for coffee afterwards. But except for bench press (which I am just starting and need him to spot me) we do our own thing when we are there. I usually don't need a LOT of extra motivation, so I can easily go to the gym on my own to make up for the days when my husband has other activities. On the day of the big snowstorm just recently, my husband worked from home, but he didn't want me to miss my workout so he drove me to the gym and picked me up after. I really appreciated it since that is one time I probably would have skipped the gym if he hadn't offered to take me.
Fitness Minutes: (16,557)
1,220 2/11/13 8:12 A
Fitness Minutes: (157,325)
5,977 2/11/13 7:57 A
I walk with my dog.
Fitness Minutes: (67,477)
1,529 2/11/13 7:26 A
I walk in the mornings with my husband and do all other workouts alone. I prefer to not even have people come over to talk to me at the gym. I'll be polite but my gym time is limited and I need to get the workout in.
Fitness Minutes: (1,369)
400 2/11/13 7:07 A
I prefer to workout alone, I'm still not completely comfortable with people seeing me workout. I've actually only told a few people about my journey! But I enjoy my workouts alone with Sparkpeople videos
I prefer to work out alone and with my ipod. I have a steady gym partner that we meet there at the same time and keep each other going in the mornings. We chat for a little while on the gym equipment but after 15 minutes we are all business.
Fitness Minutes: (27,878)
72 2/11/13 3:24 A
I bike and run alone, but I have a standing date with my sister-in-law for a step class every Thursday, and I do exercise videos with my kids. Generally I prefer classes for weight training/interval traning. I need the structure - and the company - a group situations provides.
Fitness Minutes: (5,332)
155 2/11/13 3:11 A
I've always preferred to work out alone (And I've definitely gotten results doing it that way). I see having another person there as the 'third wheel' between "myself" and "I". Plus, I found that if I'm not listening to heart pumping music, I'm just not going to workout as hard. I mean seriously, talking to other people while exercising? What kind of concentration does that foster? Plus, I'm usually somewhat out of breath, and too focused on my breathing and heart rate. Also, others generally don't want to work out for the same amount of time as I do (60 minutes is my standard for cardio, plus weights). Just be frank with your friend. It's not a bad thing to express your needs. I've had workout buddies that bailed on me so many times. I don't mind working out with other people, but if I do, it's extra, and outside of my normal routine.
No, you're right about the excuses - I'm full of them. A lot of the guilt comes from having good intentions at the start, talking to a friend about losing weight and getting into the gym, and then not doing it. Thank you for calling me out, I needed to hear it! I shouldn't doubt her on her loss, I should celebrate with her! Thank you again :)
I work out alone. I've tried buddies in the past and found myself working around their schedule. I also used them as my excuse not to work out, if they didn't go then I found myself not going I've finally realized that I have to workout according to the schedule that best works for me. I'm a morning person and prefer to workout first thing each day. This is working for me. My friend and I still get together but not for workouts.
For your own success, it's best to find the schedule that will work for you maybe rather than having a workout partner you could have a different kind of accountability partner. You don't have work out together but give each other a report of your day. One of my coworkers is quite the exercise enthusiast and she would look for me at our company gym. I realized that working out at the company gym wasn't working with my schedule so I began using my regular gym membership instead. She inquired why she no longer saw me at the company gym and I explained to her that it was presenting complications during my work day because I'd leave work and relieve my dog during my lunch break....it became rather hectic. Now, I attend my regular gym and text her my progress for the day....so she has become my accountability partner and I removed that extra step from my workday.
I run alone. It's about being your own best friend. It's about doing this for yourself. Tell your friend that her schedule doesn't work with yours. Hit the gym by yourself. I am sure if you need a workout buddy someone there might be right for you.
Fitness Minutes: (60,279)
1,749 2/10/13 6:58 P
alone! I don't have to wait on anyone and I can do what I want.....
Fitness Minutes: (7,311)
1,012 2/10/13 4:49 P
I usually work out alone. It's easier for me.
Fitness Minutes: (1,260)
3 2/10/13 4:21 P
I work out alone it is my time to think (:
Fitness Minutes: (3,486)
26 2/10/13 4:19 P
I generally prefer to workout alone. The majority of my workouts are at home and early in the morning before work when my darling daughter is sleeping. But, if it's the weekend, or a nice afternoon after work, I try to plan some family activity time like walking / hiking / playing some ball. When the weather warms up a bit, I have a coworker friend who plans to meet me for an hour a couple times a week to walk and chat while my daughter is in her tae kwon do class. I really enjoy my down time alone when at home but find outdoor activities are more fun with someone else. Based on what you've said, I'd suggest cutting back on your time with her to two or three days a week for an hour or so and go on the other days while she's at work. Know that we're all different, our motivations rise and fall at times, and don't let her success or your "slower pace" get to you. Just focus on yourself, your choices, and your progress. We each have one life to live.. live yours.
I don't mean this to sound rude, but it sounds like you're making excuses. It sounds like she's a little more into working out and has yielded good results so far, and that's what's making you feel guilty. (I see no reason why a friend would lie to you about losing 20 pounds.) She goes to the gym without you, so why would it be weird for you to go without her? You say that you spend a lot of time together, so when she asks you to go, you say no just because you don't want to spend any more time together. That sounds like a cop out. If you really wanted to get your butt in the gym, it seems like you might eliminate one of your other hangouts in lieu of a gym session together. (If it really is the time together you want to limit.) I don't want to make you feel badly, because you already said you felt guilty... but I see 2 options here. You can either A.) Talk to your friend and tell her you kind of want to do the gym thing on your own for a while. You could even tell her you're going through some stuff and need some space in general if she really is so clingy. Or B.) Ignore your friends requests to hit the gym together, and to try to avoid her all together, hoping she'll get the hint. If you run into her at the gym you can pull the old, "Oh man, I never got your text!" line if necessary.
You asked for advice on how to get your "butt in the gym when she isn't there" so I'm not sure if you're asking another question more related to motivation, or what not. If you truly value her friendship, I think you should be honest with her and tell her that you need a little space and that you feel working out alone would be best for you right now. Tell her it's better for your schedule if you go on your own time. You could even pick 1 day a week to go workout together if you wanna try to eliminate hurting her feelings. It's really up to you.
Fitness Minutes: (2,799)
263 2/10/13 4:07 P
I work out alone. I love the time to reflect and push myself mentally.
Fitness Minutes: (2,172)
14 2/10/13 3:37 P
I usually workout alone. Recently, my husband joined me.
I have two workout buddies that normally spin with me at 5:30am. One gets to the gym around 4:45am and saves a certain bike for me. We chat before class but when spinning class starts we don't talk because all of us got up to exercise. Then there is a third girl and, fortunately, she doesn't always show up. She never stops talking and it is a blessing when she isn't there. I am motivated to show up for spin because someone has gone to the trouble to save a bike for me. However, whether I have buddies or not, I do feel more motivated in a class setting because I feed off others in the class and push myself much harder than if I were working out on my own.
Fitness Minutes: (1,218)
21 2/10/13 2:47 P
I do all my physical activities by myself and I love it! I have tried friends and buddies but with Fibro I have learned I can't push myself like others think I should, the consequences are horrendous. AJRAGS, I learned that I am important and I need to stay on a schedule that fits for me, so I tell my friends "sorry, that doesn't work for me, see ya later." Take charge of your self, no victims allowed. You are the most important person and you have to take care of you because, when you get down to it, no body really cares as much as you do. I love my MP3 player for recording audo books to listen to while I walk, that way I learn something and am interested in it. Wishing you all the best and happiness EACH day.
Fitness Minutes: (50,989)
704 2/10/13 2:42 P
I workout alone. I have a couple of friends that I've invited to go with me to the gym. One friend has gone with me once. The other decided to go later in the day with her boyfriend. She's not a morning person. It doesn't bother me if I workout alone though. In fact, I prefer working out alone. I don't see why you should have to tell her. If you do decide to go with her to the gym (assuming you guys are going to the gym), tell her upfront that you have somewhere to be at a certain time (getting your haircut, drs. appt., interview, etc.) and that you won't have time to "hang out" after the workout. If she always workouts at the same time everyday (or each time she works out), then workout before she does. So, when she asks, you can tell her that you already worked out.
Fitness Minutes: (76,977)
1,270 2/10/13 1:52 P
I used to go to a gym and I had one close friend who went there, but I met several other people and got to know them well. Problem was, I wanted to work out alone and they bugged me. At 5:30 a.m. I wanted peace and quiet so I could plan my day and get my self going. I wanted to sweat and meditate without them. I quit going to the gym and gained weight. I work so later I started walking every day at lunch time. Then people started to accompany me. I needed that break from work and work people and I wasn't getting it if they came with me. So I quit going. I gained weight. I don't mind walking with my husband but for some reason I prefer to do the rest of my work outs and walking in solitary mode. I know that they say a buddy will motivate us and keep us on track but in all honesty, that has completely backfired on me. Do what works for you or it won't work at all
Edited by: GLORIAMAJDI at: 2/10/2013 (19:21)
Fitness Minutes: (12,416)
60 2/10/13 1:44 P
I do most of my working out alone (either a video at home or a run in my neighborhood), but I have been involved in a weekly running group that really motivated me to get in shape. Before I started running with them on the weekends, I had never run more than 3 or 4 miles. But some of the people were so motivating and encouraging that they convinced most of our group to up the mileage and even run a half marathon! I found that to keep up with the group goals, I had to get more disciplined on my own during the week. It was also a fun way to keep in touch -- I'd rather go for a run and grab a coffee afterwards than spend Saturday night at a bar.
I work out alone as I do it at home, early, and the wife isn't out of bed yet. If I were you I'd suggest to the work out buddy that her schedule is hard to fit with yours. Then start hitting the gym solo. Strike up some conversations there, you may find a new one.
Actually I work out with 2 buddies.It actually helps me in alot of ways.I am the one that is always working out and the other 2 I push.Do not be discouraged about it,do not worry about what they are doing only you.Love yourself and forgive everytime and get back on your schedule.Look at that person as a inspiration,always be positive.Look to your higher power for strength.You can and will win this battle,you have it in you,we all know you do!Use the situation to your advantage to push yourself cause in the long run you will have won for yourself.
I have a friend who I started working out with a few months ago, she goes more often then I do and has lost (she says) 20 pounds. I want to be happy for her, but I'm so bogged down with my own guilt for not working out as much as I should have that I get pretty bitter about it all. The problem is that she is very co-dependent, and we spend A LOT of time together. So when she texts me and wants to work out, I just don't want to spend anymore time with her and say no. We also have to go around her schedule because she has a regular job and I don't. I always thought I needed a buddy, but when it comes to the one I have, I'd rather work out alone. I don't want to hurt her feelings, so any advice to get my butt in the gym when she isn't there without having to tell her the real reason?
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