WOW DRAGONCHILDE If I ever grow up...I want to be just like you.
Fitness Minutes: (15,360)
9,707 2/12/14 12:01 P
I have lived through a personal hell over the last year, fighting my husband's addictions, poverty, and more.
I have people telling me all the time how "brave" and "courageous" I am... I'm not. I'm just me. I don't feel strong. I don't feel courageous. I just do what I have to.
I've never been a timid person, though. I'm not afraid of running by myself at night. I'm not afraid of driving by myself (or making left turns, like my anxiety-driven grandmother.) I just am. I hit the weights in the scary part of the gym (with the big grunting guys.)
I am a practical person. Fear is an irrational thing, and when you really get around to the nuts and bolts, what we fear is harmless, and rarely even close to the reality. So you have bits and bobs hanging out of a bathing suit. When I went to the beach a couple years ago, I discovered that EVERYONE did. Those Miami-based TV show bikini bodies? Are paid actresses. What you see in reality is usually worse than you are. ;) You won't be the biggest, you won't be the smallest, and most importantly? No one cares. If they think of you at all, it'll be in passing, and then they're moving on with their microcosm of a life.
There is nothing like overcoming insecurity and succeeding at reaching a goal to give someone more confidence and courage. Personally, I still feel very vulnerable when it comes to certain social situations (Yes, even Moi). And now that I am older (if not wiser) trying new physical exercise stuff intimidates me. I am more fearful of taking an Extra long walk, alone, away from easy transportation home or a rest area. But, on the other hand, I am not shy about doing my best at exercising and looking a little silly to someone watching. I've developed the ability to laugh at myself. But bathing suits...that's scary to me.
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