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RENATARUNS SparkPoints: (4,367)
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6/13/14 9:52 A

12 days is not enough; I hope you and your doctor both know that and are ready to get you more when you run out. Best wishes.

SLIMMERKIWI Posts: 26,041
6/13/14 12:01 A

Zorbs - I am really pleased to see that you have taken that step. That is the most difficult one. Hopefully you will start to see results, be do be aware that sometimes meds can take a few weeks to become properly effective.

In my instance, my sleep started to improved which in turn started to improve my depression.

BIG hugs and hang in there.

Kris xxx

LOVEXAVIE SparkPoints: (42,597)
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6/12/14 12:28 A

Way to go for going, Zorbs.
I am proud of you. I know it wasn't easy, but you did it.
I truly hope it helps.

BHENDRICK2 Posts: 1,199
6/11/14 5:23 P

emoticon i am glad you got something to help you

EELPIE Posts: 2,700
6/11/14 5:20 P

Good for you Zorbs. I am very proud of you.

Now you need to look into getting the prescription filled. Someone suggested above a way to get them filled where you live for little to no cost I believe?


SP_COACH_DEAN SparkPoints: (112,529)
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6/11/14 4:55 P

Hi, Zorbs

“Sometimes the moments that challenge us the most, define us."

That was some really good work, facing that fear you described of going to the doctor, and doing it anyway. In my experience of dealing with depression and anxiety, the hardest challenge is always to let someone else know what's really going on beneath the surface, and ask for some help. It took me many years and a LOT of beer and extra eating to get to that point, but I'm very glad now that I managed to do it before it was too late.

Let us know if we can do anything to help...


ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (190,568)
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6/11/14 1:15 P


ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/11/14 12:53 P

I went to the doctor and got 12 days worth of medication.

ASHAIXIM Posts: 2,616
6/11/14 11:30 A

I'm writing this from a view point of been there done that - so please don't feel like I'm being "mean" or unsympathetic. I have on-going clinical depression and I am bi-polar so I really do understand what you are going through. I was suicidal for about 9 months in 2012-13 as well.

You won't go to the doctors
You won't take medication
You won't get "free" help
You won't take over the counter supplements

We both know that you can't "think" your way out of depression and having people tell you to "cheer up" makes you want to scream.

We both know that Mental Health issues have a huge stigma attached to them and, especially at work you don't want to have to disclose anything about it.

We both know that if you tell your doctor you are depressed to the point that you are you are going to get a referral and you aren't going to go.

So, instead of asking for help that you aren't going to take, start thinking of what you ARE willing to do.

Are you willing to take a 5 minute walk with your son (or by yourself) twice a day? Preferably in direct sunlight so you can get the benefit of what little Vitamin D you can get at your latitude?

Are you willing to meditate for 5 minutes a day (even if it's in the bathroom to get away from people)?

Are you willing to journal your thoughts and feelings?

Are you willing to write a letter to a friend telling them everything you are going through (even if you don't send it)?

What are you willing to do that would be a baby step towards possibly improving your situation? I know you aren't going to read this and jump out of bed tomorrow feeling great! But at least if you start making some baby steps you might! feel a tinsy bit better and then you can build on that.

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (190,568)
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6/11/14 9:47 A


Get out of the house and take a walk. If you're looking after your son, put him in his stroller and take him with you.

I was laid off in 2012 after working for 16 years for the same company. I was shocked and started getting depressed about being out of work. There is one thing I knew. And was that depression would get worse, if I didn't get out of the house. Every day, while I looked for work, I took a walk or hit the gym. I knew that it wasn't healthy to continuously stare at those walls. When you're depressed, there are days when it feels like those walls are closing in on you.

That's why I took a walk or went to the gym every day. I changed my environment. You need to do that too. Get out and get some fresh air. Feel the sunshine on your face. Don't stay shut up in the house.

A walk in the park can help. It helped me when I was feeling low.


I hope your daughter's stay in the hospital has helped aid in her recovery from depression. I'm sure she'll feel much better once she's at home. Also, if you're both feeling stressed out, I'm going to suggest the same thing I did for ZORBs. Get out of the house. Take a walk together. Walking is not only terrific cardiovascular exercise, it's a great way to reduce stress too.

Edited by: ARCHIMEDESII at: 6/11/2014 (13:14)
KAYLEESMEME SparkPoints: (23,598)
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6/11/14 8:38 A

Feeling a bit of anxiety today. My daughter who has been hospitalized for depression, is coming home today. I am happy she is coming home, but at the same time, I am afraid she won't keep herself safe. I am praying that she will be ok. I would probably feel a little better if she was being discharged because she is well. No, instead she is being discharged because the insurance company says they won't pay. Stupid insurance, can I sue them if my little girl hurts herself?

I just want her to be well, and happy. Her life is just beginning. This should have been her best year at school (senior year) instead it became the worst, most stressful year yet. To top things off, it is not over, she is going to go to high school for a 5th year. I don't blame her, she missed so much this year.

I am so sad that she is so sad.

I have tried to get her to exercise with me, I know she would feel better, being productive. I need to keep her engaged, busy.

ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/11/14 7:59 A

Feeling worse today. I am not sure how much worse I can feel. I have never felt depressed for so long before. Just numb and completely overwhelmed with any simple tasks I have to do. The only time I don't feel bad is when exercising, but I have been exercising even more than usual and I cannot exercise 24/7. Had a chance to sleep in this morning but tossed and turned all night.

Edited by: ZORBS13 at: 6/11/2014 (08:00)
ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/10/14 11:26 P

"Since you are a seasoned runner, you know that running 26.2 miles isn't just about having cardiovascular endurance or muscular strength. You have to have mental strength too !"

lol bad example. My marathon PB would be probably around 3:45 instead of 3:59 if I had a bit more mental fortitude.

LADYSTARWIND SparkPoints: (79,636)
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6/10/14 3:21 P

...just a thought until you find yourself taking those needed, larger steps....

one very simple, yet extremely powerful, thing I learned during my depression groups, was to make a list of three simple positive things you like: mine was a cup of hot chocolate, sing a song, and crochet (and by the time I was further along, some others too!) When I felt the world closing in, I was to take just a few minutes to do one or all of those three things...and realize nothing could take those little joys away from me. Its a very small step, but it helps reset the mind from the spiral of negative thinking which depression brings....

There truly is Joy in Life...and I'm confident you will find yours' again soon....

LOVEXAVIE SparkPoints: (42,597)
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6/10/14 11:38 A

Zorbs, it sounds like you're on the right track in getting your husband to go with you.

I know he couldn't go today. Do you feel he understands the severity of what your going through? I'm not at all saying he did not (there could be a completely valid reason he couldn't go for this appt) but if there's any doubt, maybe you could show him this post.
If the shoe were on the other foot, you'd want to help him.

Once you feel he & you are one on this, priority #1 has to be getting you in to see someone.
I many things in life compete for top priority, but this really IS.

If he can't attend with you for the next appt opening, do you have a girlfriend that could go?

If nothing else, you can see here that we all care about you and sincerely want you to get the help needed. You are valuable here (and elsewhere, of course!). No one can answer board posts quite like YOU. You have a clarity that I & many others admire.

Sending good thoughts your way.

SIMPLELIFE2 Posts: 707
6/10/14 10:46 A

I hope your husband is able to help you get the medical support you need. If you were having problems like a kidney infection or a broken bone, would you not get treatment? This is no different. Sometimes the strongest, most courageous thing we can do is reach out for help.

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (190,568)
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6/10/14 10:32 A


In many ethnic families, topics like mental illness are never discussed because it's considered shameful. My older relatives were/are like that.

Let me tell you something about my family. I don't know the whole story because many of my relatives have passed away and the ones that are left don't really want to discuss the matter. However, I have been told that my grandmother had a nervous breakdown and needed to be institutionalized. This would have been in the 30s or 40s when people just didn't deal with these things. If a family member had a mental problem, you put them into an institution. then you pretended like they never existed or just went away.

Today, things are different. People are more aware of how to treat things like depression, post traumatic stress and other illnesses of these kinds. No one is going to lock you away. No one is going to treat you like you are different because you suffer from depression. Depression can be treated, but you must be proactive. You've seen the signs and symptoms. You have an opportunity to fix this right now. You just need to be ready to take a leap of faith.

I know that's not easy, but you need to break through this barrier.

Let me ask you this, when you were training for a marathon, how did you break the mental barrier that separated running a half marathon from a full marathon ? Since you are a seasoned runner, you know that running 26.2 miles isn't just about having cardiovascular endurance or muscular strength. You have to have mental strength too !

You have the mental toughness to run a 26.2 mile marathon. that means you do have what it takes to get you to the doctor. Look within and find that strength because it is there.

LADYSTARWIND brought up a very good point about research. I live in Boston where there places like Mass General Hospital, Tufts Univ, Harvard, Leahy Clinic they all do research. I've seen the ads on the subway looking for people suffering from depression or anxiety if they want to be part of a study. Many of these studies will also pay a small stipend to be part of the study.

How can you beat that ? You have access to top notch psychiatrists, paid medication, support groups, etc... Why not look into that too ? That's another possible option.

And that's the wonderful thing about living in the US/Canada today. There are options. My grandmother didn't have those options, but you do.

ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/10/14 9:12 A

renata - that list of symptoms describes me perfectly. I often can't muster the energy to shower, nothing sounds good for dinner because I have a laundry list of why I can't eat this/do that. I decided that I will stop going to my husband's family celebrations because there are 40 of them in a tiny house and they all try to talk to me, all the food is unhealthy and I just literally sit on the floor in the corner of the living room and cry the entire time. I've tried for 10 years to get comfortable, I can't and I give up. This latest episode was triggered a bit by this kindergarten orientation that I had to go to last week, there was a dinner and the people at the table tried to talk to me and I couldn't answer. Then my husband said some things that were really embarrassing and he kept doing it because he failed to pick up that I was freaking out.

he tried to call the doctor for me this morning and make an appointment but since he can't go with me today, I refused to go.

I really can't afford meds. Often before payday I have less than $5 in my bank account, but my bills are paid and we have healthy meals for the week. Maybe $45 a month seems reasonable, but it is not something I can afford. I suppose you can say I do want to get help, but I can't get over my fear and make myself go. Just telling me to do it isn't working. I CANNOT MAKE MYSELF GO.

Edited by: ZORBS13 at: 6/10/2014 (09:20)
RENATARUNS SparkPoints: (4,367)
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6/10/14 8:53 A

If you're willing to try an OTC medicine, look for something called SAM-e. (NatureMade is the most well-known and probably the most reliable brand. I think that's what it's called. I expect you can find it in Canada.)

It works, for me at least without significant side effects, and it works fast -- in about a week. Though I will warn you that the initial flush of feeling human again may not last indefinitely without increasing dosage. I've taken anywhere from 400 mg to 800 mg daily, split into two doses. It's not cheap, though I can't specify the exact price these days as my husband's been picking it up for me at the Costco near his work for so long that I've plain forgotten. I *think* it was in the range of $30-$50 a month. I could be wrong.

(Oh here we go. This is amazon, $25 for 36 400-mg tablets. So about $45 a month if you're taking 800 mg a day.
-400mg-Tablets/dp/B0002D150Y This is likely not the cheapest it can be found.)

It also seems to do very little directly for anxiety, if anything, but lifting depression a bit makes it so much easier to keep worries in perspective.

I promise I'm not a salesperson or anything or affiliated with the company in any way. I rarely mention what I take for my own depression. But you seem so much in pain I had to at least offer what has helped me.

And you really need to find someone to talk to. Isolation feeds into depression; it's brutal. If doctors scare you too much for now -- and believe me I understand your concerns -- perhaps some kind of support group, a holistic practitioner in your area, something. Whenever you have the slightest bit of energy or motivation or reduction in fear, look into it.

In the meantime, talk to your husband. Don't worry that he doesn't understand. No one does who hasn't been through it. That doesn't mean they can't still be helpful to you. You can look up some "what does depression feel like" pages on the internet and hand him a few that resonate with you, or you can give him personalized lists, like for me it would be:
-- No joy. Even things I used to love feel pointless.
-- Huge stress. If my mind is not constantly occupied with something trivial, or if I am not sleeping, I will be wishing I was doing one of those things and trying to escape back to it.
-- Can't deal with people. The simplest social conversations are beyond me. My mind's a blank.
-- The tiniest tasks are insurmountable obstacles. For you, getting up and going out the door in the morning takes about as much thought and effort as it took for me to write this sentence. For me, it's a daunting list of chores: "pull back the covers, stand up, walk to bathroom, find toothbruth, find toothpaste, turn on water, brush teeth ..." Well, that covers the first two minutes and I'm already exhausted. What about the next 40?
-- Making decisions is impossible. Even where to go for dinner if we're going out.
-- I'm extremely sensitive to criticism. I hate myself for feeling like this, I hate what I am doing because of the depression, I hate what I am not doing because of the depression, I've lost track of where the depression ends and I begin. If you ask me innocently why the laundry is not done yet, I will likely be furious at you and at myself for hours, even if I don't react outwardly. But I may cry, or I may scream. And it's like this for everything.

As well, look into what people can actually do for depressed partners. Google "what can you do for someone who is depressed" and click through links. Show them to your husband. He's probably feeling helpless, whether you currently realize it or not, and having some concrete tasks may help. Tell him that ultimately he can't pull you out of the depression. Only you can. But he can help. Again relating my own experience, I would ask not to be confronted with unnecessary decisions. I would ask to be assisted in getting outside in the fresh air, with quiet company, even if on some days it meant he'd have to bring me my shoes and help me start tying them until embarrassment made me take over. And so on.

I hope you feel better soon, Zorb.

SLIMMERKIWI Posts: 26,041
6/10/14 6:49 A

Unfortunately, and particularly with mental health, it isn't uncommon to have to 'shop around' for a Therapist who is the right fit for us. I have been fortunate in that all the Psychologists/Therapists I have seen have been really good, and not one of them showed any signs of boredom or lack of listening. Sometimes it is the Depression/Anxiety etc. that tells the person these negative things. In all honesty, we can't afford to trust what that Depression is telling us in those circumstances. You DO have the power, but YOU have to call the tune.

I have been MORE than impressed with my Psychologists and Therapist's ability to remember things I had said 2-3 or more, months earlier. They have also shown compassion and understanding. I had a lot of 'repeating' too. They NEED to know directly from us, the background. It wasn't just Phsycholgists/Therapist/Psychiatrist I had to repeat to, either. Our Accident Compensation Corporation has us running through hoops seeing lots of different types of Doctors, Occupational Therapists, etc. We don't get a choice - if we don't go, we don't get any compensation.

A lot of my problems started after a really bad car accident, and unfortunately, the professionals (a Dr and some of the Nursing, Kitchen, and OT Staff in the hospital) just weren't listening. As a result I ended up suffering considerably with food allergies (painful welts adding to the already intense pain for a number of fractures etc.) and being refused the antihistamines I had asked for. I also suffered extra pain for a few days because I wasn't provided with something as simple as a sling ... for a fractured clavicle. It took a comment from a Dr a few days after admission for them to get me one. I was diagnosed with PTSD as a result of my car accident and the sequale (hospital treatment.) I was VERY loathe to talk to anyone other than my GP. He was the only one who had shown any empathy and understanding. I had actually gotten to the stage where I didn't want to live anymore. When I realized what I was thinking and why, I decided to fight back. My LIFE was worth it and my family were entitled to have their wife/mother/daughter/sister with them. I even somehow found the strength to take on the Hospital Board. It is a very large hospital and one of the busiest in Australia/New Zealand. I pushed and pushed and if I never got the answers I was wanting, I pushed again. In the end I got a formal apology from the Hospital and they put policies in place to ensure that what happened to me doesn't happen to others. In fact, one of my letters is now used as part of their training for their staff.

I am sure that if you look within yourself you will find that inner strength. I have seen a few of your posts on the message boards, and I KNOW that you have it. You just have to look for it from a different angle. Don't let that Depression/Anxiety get the better of you. Kick it in the guts ... and really, the only way you can properly do that is with the appropriate Medical and Psychological input.

Sometimes it is the Depression/Anxiety etc. that tells the person these negative things. In all honesty, we can't afford to trust what that Depression is telling us in those circumstances. You DO have the power, but YOU have to call the tune.


ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/10/14 6:27 A

I am self employed and not religious. I refuse to burden my friends, and I've tried to talk to my husband, and he doesn't understand what my problem is. My parents are of the old school that believe that mental issues = feeble minded and would be so disappointed in me if I even tried to talk to them (not that I EVER would).

a huge part of my reluctance to see someone is that I absolutely HATE having to tell my 'story' over and over again to someone who looks bored and is only paid to listen, only to get passed along to their colleague, or I don't like them and find someone else, rinse and repeat. This has always happened to me in the past when seeking professional help and I refuse to do it again.

Edited by: ZORBS13 at: 6/10/2014 (06:30)
SLIMMERKIWI Posts: 26,041
6/10/14 6:08 A

Is there someone else in your 'real' life that you can talk to? Do you have a Pastor/Minister/Priest? They can be a good starting point, and often the Church has someone who provides Therapy - some qualified even. Does your work have someone? Here, some firms have someone available to their staff on a confidential basis, as in the name of the person is provided and the staff member can seek them out discretely. No-one else need know. Often, a problem shared is a problem halved.

Kris xxx

ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/10/14 5:54 A

thanks for the support but I really don't think I am able to go see a doctor at this time.

LADYSTARWIND SparkPoints: (79,636)
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6/9/14 10:54 P

You are such a positive voice and presence in this community that many of us are feeling your pain....

I too went through a round of major depression in my earlier years. Fortunately, I actually got physically ill (anxiety symptoms..)...and my doctor recognized what was going on! I was put in touch with a research program which of charge...small group counseling sessions with other women and individual followup interviews. It was a VERY positive experience!! I hope you will check with a Medical Center near you to see if they are connected with such a program....

Working with my doctor, I also did choose a low level anti-depressant medication.... It was an old fashioned.. and .inexpensive.. medication....the biggest effect it had was that I could actually sleep!! That alone made a WORLD of difference!

Wishing you all the best....we need your voice & experience back here soon! Take Care, Keep in touch!!

SLIMMERKIWI Posts: 26,041
6/9/14 8:52 P

ZORBS, unfortunately a lot of people don't go to their Dr when they really need to because of fear. It is fear of the unknown .... the 'what if's' and I feel that is where you are coming from, apart from financial.

There are many ways of accessing free/cheap medication if that is needed. There are many ways of accessing free/cheap therapy, also, if that is needed. Your Dr is the very best person for you to make that initial contact with. It may even be some other health issue which is easily treated which could be contributing to your depression and lack of caring about yourself and others. Unfortunately, if you don't address it now, it WILL get worse. Please, for YOU, get the help you need NOW. You are assuming that you would be hospitalized - most people can be treated properly at the community level, and not need that hospitalization.

As far as pay-cheque to pay-cheque, there are loads of ways that you can access free/cheap food, clothing etc. Try food banks, or charity shops. I have had many food grants to help me through, and have bought some really good (and on a couple occasions brand new with the labels still attached) clothing for a gold coin. Some charity shops (here) also sell a little fruit/veges on the side, too, donated from people who have too much in their garden, or commercial growers giving the shops a few seconds. Look out for fruit/vege stalls on the side of the road. I often get some of mine that way, too.

Look at ways to cut costs - bulk cooking takes advantage of good specials and saves on power/gas. Just freeze in single serve containers. I don't buy containers for this. I use recycled margarine containers and the plastic containers that hot meals come in.

As far as the lack of sleep is concerned, I can speak from experience when I say that sometimes when we are sleep deprived we don't notice it, UNTIL we start getting a regular amount of sleep, and THEN we realize that we weren't coping as we thought we were. In a lot of cases the lack of sleep can contribute significantly toward depression.

Please, make that appointment with your Dr. YOU deserve it, and so too does your family!!


EELPIE Posts: 2,700
6/9/14 7:33 P

@ Athena emoticon

JAMINURSE Posts: 3,857
6/9/14 7:15 P

ZORBS13 I am going to do something I have never done, and disclose some very personal information. I am a 48 year old successful active duty service member (US) and I felt very much like what you are describing in 2009 and to make a long story short, I did not get help. I did not seek out mental health services because I thought it would end my military career. I was in graduate school at the time and attributed the symptoms to stress. After a few weeks with no sleep, I was convinced that the only answer was to take my own life. I was very fortunate that despite my plan, my husband discovered me. If I had only sought help, that may have been prevented. I almost died. I have spent many years in therapy for PTSD that I did not recognize. I also had a Thyroid problem that probably contributed and certainly exacerbated the situation. That is not the point. You MUST tell someone close to you how you are feeling. Please I am begging you to get help. You are having signs of Major depression and regardless of what is causing this, you need some help. I wish I had more to support you. I am also a Critical Care nurse and I have seen a lot of tragedy. Please take of yourself, I am worried about you.

BHENDRICK2 Posts: 1,199
6/9/14 3:34 P


ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (190,568)
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6/9/14 12:59 P


Take a look at this link.

"Plan G–Pays for the entire cost of psychiatric medications based on your income and clinical need. Plan G is also known as the No-Charge Psychiatric Medication Plan. For more information on this program, see Daryn’s article on the previous page."

We're all saying the same thing. Don't worry about needing any medication right now. Instead, let's concentrate on setting up and appointment with a doctor and a psychiatrist. Like EELPIE said, many doctors do have samples they can give to their patients to get them through any rough patches.

If you know you need medication, then you know you need to go to the doctor to get a prescription. Take that next step toward getting better by talking to a doctor. Take this one step at a time.

Edited by: ARCHIMEDESII at: 6/9/2014 (12:59)
ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/9/14 12:48 P

" The point was that you want to be there for your child as well as any future children, don't you ? If you're afraid to do something for yourself, then do it for your child or your husband."

that is part of the problem. I definitely don't want to get better for my son or my husband because I just don't care. Please don't go crazy and call CPS and/or the cops on me. I have never hurt my child and never would, I take care of him, but I am certainly NOT at all motivated to get better to be there for him.

Edited by: ZORBS13 at: 6/9/2014 (12:53)
EELPIE Posts: 2,700
6/9/14 12:41 P

Zorbs when you go to doctor - tell him you can't afford the medicine. Ask for free samples to help you get through - I once had no insurance and need breathing medicine - My doctor hooked me up, he gave me about a 5 month supply.

I've no idea what meds you could need..if any...but I looked online, Canadian Pharmacy sells 100 pills of zoloft for like 70 bucks, that's what? A 3 month supply? Less than $23 a month.

100 of the generic, Sertraline, is $35.00 - that's very cheap.

Before you panic, go and see him/her...see what is suggested, then deal with it.

Edited by: EELPIE at: 6/9/2014 (12:42)
ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/9/14 12:06 P

I am certain I need medication. I can practically feel the wires misfiring in my brain from chemical imbalance as opposed to situational depression.

Edited by: ZORBS13 at: 6/9/2014 (12:47)
ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (190,568)
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6/9/14 11:48 A


You don't talk about your baby that often, so I apologize for confusing the gender. The point was that you want to be there for your child as well as any future children, don't you ? If you're afraid to do something for yourself, then do it for your child or your husband. Your well being does impact their well being too.

You're reaching out for help, that says that you really do want to do something. You've been brave enough to do this, now you just need a small nudge to get you to the doctor. I'm sure that if you talk to a doctor and explain the situation, there are resources to help you get any medication you need.

Here's the thing, you're assuming you need medication. Why worry about something that hasn't happened or might not happen ? Start with the referral to a psychiatrist. Talk to a professional. If they decide that medication can help, we'll worry about what to do then. For now, get a referral to a psychiatrist to see what they recommend.

Remember, people were treated successfully for depression long before anyone ever heard of things like Prozac or lithium. Some times, just talking to someone can help.

ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/9/14 10:43 A

I don't have a baby daughter. I spent the entire weekend trying to call the hotlines in my area but 1 didn't answer and the 2nd had a busy signal for 12 hours straight.

Strangely, I don't feel tired at all. I'm as clear headed as if I got 8 hours sleep. My normal is 4-5 hours a night anyways, so I'm not missing the sleep at all.

Where I live, after the initial referal by the GP, psychiatrists are the only mental health professionals covered under OHIP, and I don't have insurance, so any medication would have to come out of pocket, and I already live paycheque to paycheque.

Edited by: ZORBS13 at: 6/9/2014 (11:07)
LOVEXAVIE SparkPoints: (42,597)
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6/9/14 10:25 A

You can do it, Zorbs.
I, too, thought of your son.
Look at it this way: even if it's just lack of sleep and nothing else, that alone can impair anyone's function on the job, let alone taking care of a little one. And you don't want that to happen.

Grab a loved one or friend and go. Let the dr know that even seeing them causes stress; a good dr will understand, appreciate the heads-up and help you through it.

You are strong. You can do this.
Depression cannot eff with someone who runs 26 miles for fun!!
Good luck.

Edited by: LOVEXAVIE at: 6/9/2014 (12:00)
ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (190,568)
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6/9/14 9:47 A

CIVILSPARKY SparkPoints: (16,087)
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6/9/14 9:40 A

As a person who is bi-polar, I understand where you're coming from. But, NOT seeing the doctor will really make you miss work, for a much longer time. If you are worried about being hospitalized, they can work around this. You can get help and still go to work, but you have to act sooner rather than later. Good luck!

Edited by: CIVILSPARKY at: 6/9/2014 (09:41)
LEC358 SparkPoints: (11,135)
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6/9/14 9:06 A

Here are some free 24/7 counseling hotlines that may help:

You know you need help, that's why you reached out here. Depression and anxiety are tough enough to get through with professional help, let alone on your own. I hope you can reach out to a professional who is qualified to help.

ZORBS13 SparkPoints: (181,538)
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6/9/14 7:55 A

I need help. I am so depressed that I haven't slept in a month and haven't eaten for 2 days but a large part of my anxiety is actually going to see a doctor and so I don't. I don't know how to get past this. I cannot be hospitalized because I will be financially ruined if I miss any work.

Edited by: ZORBS13 at: 6/9/2014 (07:57)
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