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STEELER71 Posts: 8,048
1/3/14 5:18 A

I'm at goal weight now and I don't let anything they say bother me. In fact my Aunt told me I was being rude for not listening to her and my husband jumped in and told her she was the one being rude for always harping about my weight. What a guy.

MICHELLEXXXX SparkPoints: (11,653)
Fitness Minutes: (5,830)
Posts: 3,607
1/3/14 4:12 A

With regards to guilt over "wasting" food; If your significant other continually brought home a case of beer, would you feel guilty telling him you don't want to drink with him? I think we all have a responsibility to take care of the body we are given and the right to ask our spouses to support and encourage the positive paths we choose.

EMPRESSAMQ Posts: 5,077
1/2/14 9:00 A

I just remember that I am me and how I "diet" or not diet are my own business and I ignore the opinions of others and smile like the Mona Lisa.

Upon occasion I forget who I am and then dealing with others who like or don't like my weight management efforts becomes confusing and gets in my own way, but basically I don't care what anyone else thinks about my journey.

MISSRUTH Posts: 4,143
1/2/14 6:58 A

My DH does not "diet"-- he doesn't need to. He can eat enormous quantities of food and not gain weight. I, on the other hand, can smell a doughnut and my butt gets bigger. sigh.

I'm fortunate in that he'll eat whatever I cook, just larger quantities than I do. Or he'll add a slice of bread to his meal, something like that. Going out is hard, but it's easier than it used to be because a lot more places are including 500 calories or less, or 600 calories or less, items on their menus. I suspect over the next few years, we'll see more states requiring restaurants to post nutritional values on their menus.

I'd agree that no one has ever literally thrown me down, and forced food down my throat. I'm a big one for personal responsibility, and the bottom line for me is that I am responsible for me. I hate to waste food, but I will throw it away, or portion it out into several servings, or freeze it to eat later-- rather than eat it all and feel bad because I overdid it.

And the exercise..... the truth is, you can lead a horse to water, but you cannot make him drink. The most you can hope for, is to make him thirsty. My DH does not exercise, and I truly wish he would. But all I can do is set a good example, and focus on my own personal fitness. Somewhere along the line, DH may indeed rise up and join me. But I'm not going to sit around here and wait to start til he gets ready.

VIXIEPLUM SparkPoints: (659)
Fitness Minutes: (267)
Posts: 7
1/2/14 3:39 A

My biggest struggle is my husband. We both need to lose weight but he won't face the facts. I watch what I eat 24/7 but one night for example he'll come home with a take away for the both of us. He knows my opinion in wasting food and that one way or another I'll eat it. I don't know if it is sabotage or him 'treating' me. He also HATES exercise of any description so I have to do all mine alone which I find can make the motivation to get up and go hard.

1/1/14 5:45 A

for me, the only "sabotager" is myself...nobody holds a gun to my head and forces me to eat poorly or excessively...I DO THAT
so to blame someone else for what Ive done and blame them for "sabotaging" me is absurd.
I let the blame lie where it is, with myself.

MICHELLEXXXX SparkPoints: (11,653)
Fitness Minutes: (5,830)
Posts: 3,607
1/1/14 1:03 A

We all make our own choices. In restaurants we order what we want. Homemade dinners almost always consist of a meat, veggie, salad, and maybe some other sides so everyone is pleased.

WHAT_THE_HECK SparkPoints: (4,505)
Fitness Minutes: (4,229)
Posts: 28
12/31/13 11:23 P

I live with my son who is a nondieter (and has no reason to be one). He has a lot of allergies so he does need to avoid some foods otherwise, if he wants to eat, he can either eat what I cook or buy and make his own food (he is 23). I try to cook somewhat healthy meals and I make sure not to add anything he is allergic to. Most the time he is happy to eat what I cook, just a lot more of it than I do.

ETHELMERZ SparkPoints: (217,256)
Fitness Minutes: (190,880)
Posts: 16,179
12/31/13 5:09 P

Part of it is jealousy because you aren't eating the way the non dieter's are, darn it!!! I fix my own food, period, and fix something different for the non dieters, and learned to live with it, but the jealousy is still there. That's life.

MLEHTO Posts: 734
12/31/13 3:43 P

I too live with a non-dieting loved one. It's challenging at times because he is a very picky eater and many of the things he doesn't like and won't eat are mainstays of a healthy diet (chicken, broccoli, cauliflower, vegetables in general) and portion control is not in his vocabulary. And I like to think that he doesn't do it on purpose but there are times when he is eating things in front of me that are not supportive.

OBIESMOM2 SparkPoints: (214,053)
Fitness Minutes: (110,905)
Posts: 14,163
12/31/13 3:12 P

my mom is really bad about what she eats. She will not try A N Y T H I N G. I tried to get her to try hummus (she loves garbanzo beans), but she's convinced it has mayo in it. I don't eat may either, mom! There is NO MAYO in hummus. Same with guacamole. She swears it has mayo in it, even when she's seen me make it (all I do is mash avocado with some salsa). And she always wants me or sis to go with her for some decadent treat.

DH will eat the healthy food I cook, but for him it's an appetizer. Then he'll eat something with little or no nutritional value. He will exercise some but it's not part of his regular routine. I try to get him to go to the park or the gym with me. He goes maybe 2% of the time that I ask.

NAPTRAL1 SparkPoints: (12,240)
Fitness Minutes: (7,518)
Posts: 161
12/31/13 2:47 P

It is not easy. My mom will eat veggies and organic this and that but she will not workout. I have tried to encourage her to workout with me indoors but she always say another time. Sometimes I wanna laugh in her face when she says her clothes dont fit but I guess its not right.

MANDIETERRIER1 Posts: 16,710
12/31/13 11:43 A

I know it can be really hard. I live with a person that has crazy notions about how to lose weight. Which usually include fad diets. They are obese and I want to ask them how it's working?

SHERYLDS Posts: 17,133
12/31/13 11:27 A

I have trouble going out to dinner with non-dieting friends...
and I have lived with someone who constantly tried to sabotage my efforts;
it was a constant battle to keep my resolve...
so when I came across this article...I was very interested.

Strategies For Dealing With Non-Dieting Loved Ones
click on the link below


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