I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your husband. No one would fault you for turning to food for comfort while you grieved. At one time or another, we too turned to food for comfort. Try not to worry about that.
Let me welcome you to Spark People !! I know the website might seem overwhelming, but click on a few links and see what pops up. Spark People is a great website with all the "tools" you need to help you become a healthier you.
My advice ? Don't try to do everything at once or you will end up frustrated. Set some simple goals first. Example, if you're not used to eating 6-9 servings of fresh fruit and veggies, set a goal to eat 2-3 servings each day for one week. If you're not used to drinking 8 glasses of water, set a goal to drink 2-4 glasses each day for one week. if you're not used to regular exercise, set a goal to take a 15-30 minute walk each day for one week. Once you've achieved those goals, then you set new ones.
One small change is all it takes to change your life. Don't look at good health or weight loss with an all or nothing mentality. If the only healthy thing you were to do for yourself today was to drink 8 glasses of water, that's still a step in the right direction. Remember, you're trying to change habits learned over a life time. That's not going to happen overnight, a week, a month or even a year. Change takes time. thus the need to be patient with yourself and your body.
Now, let me ask you this, when is the last time you had a full physical ? If you haven't been to the doctor in a long time, it's time to give them a call. Regular checkups are an important part of a healthy lifestyle. And if you have gained some weight over the last year, plus the added stress of losing your husband, you need to know what your vital numbers are. Find out what your blood pressure, blood sugar, cholesterol all are. With time, those will change.
But it is important for a person to talk to their doctor before making a change to their diet. Your doctor can also let you know what exercises would be safe to do because of any physical limitations you might have.
start slowly. take baby steps literally and figuratively. If you need support, that's why the Spark Community is here. We'll lend a cyber ear when you need one. We'll send cyber hugs too !! search the forums and read some of the questions. I think you'll find that replying to questions will help you learn about yourself too.
You may find this link helpful. www.sparkpeople.com/community/ask_the_expe