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KRISTINE99 SparkPoints: (8,098)
Fitness Minutes: (2,440)
Posts: 182
12/29/11 2:31 P

I know the temptation can be strong to emotionally eat, but you'll feel a lot better to vent out your emotions through a calorie-free method, e.g., posting on sparkpeople.

Also, when I'm in low spirits I find that writing three things that I like about myself on a post-it note and putting it on the fridge is a good way to pep me up, and reduce chances of emotional eating. For instance, "I have strong, muscular legs" "I play a great game of badminton" "I am a good friend."

Accentuate the positive is the name of the game :)



BDD923 SparkPoints: (6,407)
Fitness Minutes: (9,328)
Posts: 280
12/27/11 2:42 P

It's never helful to hear "I've been there" because no one really goes through the same thing. But all we can do is share how we dealt!

WIthin the past 2 years I have been through a divorce, a bad break up and a string of online dating horror stories. The break-up (getting dumped) was the worst. Yes. That said... it only gets better from here!

You are wrong... there is always someone to talk to. Look at you reaching out on here!! Find someone, anyone you can have a vent fest to.

The only thing that helped me move was making the choice to take care of me again... and hitting the gym!!

I hope your holidays have been better than you expected!! We would love to hear how you are doing!

BHSKITTYKATT SparkPoints: (81,869)
Fitness Minutes: (83,593)
Posts: 383
12/26/11 8:03 P

Cry, scream into a pillow, punch the pillow, just get it all out. It's OK to throw a fit when you're been dumped like that.

It sucks. I wish I could give you some magic cure for heartbreak, but the only cure is time.

Call family and friends who you know can offer support. They will come over to console you and give you lots of hugs.

Once you've vented, get out. Go for a walk. Go shopping. Go get your nails and/or hair done. Remind yourself that you are worth it and that you are strong, because you totally are.

MARTINT011 Posts: 252
12/26/11 2:42 P

Talk to a friend and don't blame yourself. I also read some uplifting books. Mostly go one day at a time too. You'll be better soon.

MICHCLEARY SparkPoints: (60,474)
Fitness Minutes: (55,972)
Posts: 5,775
12/25/11 9:36 P

It's been a few days since you posted. I hope that you've found some of the posts helpful and that you've made some progress in finding ways to cope without food. Hang in there and remember you are worth the effort to find a healthy way to cope.

MAMA_CD Posts: 1,497
12/24/11 9:14 P

Lots of things suck, especially when they involve relationships. The only suggestion that I have is to do something that you enjoy that is good for you. For me that means a long drive, or a long walk alone, just do what you enjoy and do it for you, you deserve it. emoticon

RIB2010 Posts: 9
12/24/11 7:53 P

I'm in the same boat, but I haven't been "officially" dumped. He just left and isn't speaking with me anymore. We had planned to have the most amazing Christmas ever, with him my son and I. 2 days ago, he informed me that he was staying in the city he was working in, to spend Christmas with family that he has there. I was able to arrange with my ex husband to take my son to his family's festivities, but I have nothing to do, nowhere to go, and no one to spend Christmas day with. For the first time in my life, I will have Christmas completely alone. No presents, no Christmas dinner, nothing. So, here's what I am going to do.

Get up tomorrow, have a healthy breakfast. Give myself a mani/pedi while I watch trash TV. :) Then I will do my workout, which always makes me feel like a million bucks. My cats will get turkey as their wet cat food, and I will make myself a healthy, scrumptious dinner to enjoy. I am almost finished reorganizing my bedroom, so I might finish that too.

Finding things that you enjoy doing and treating yourself to some extra special treatment can help break the blues. And exercise is, as far as I am concerned, the BEST mental health treatment you could give yourself. Listen to some upbeat, inspiring music, and get moving.

BUTTERFLIBEAUTY Posts: 113
12/24/11 7:07 P

As someone who has gone through a divorce and not by my choice, let me extend my sympathies. I know just how hard it is, especially right before the holidays. Although I don't have any magic words to mend your broken heart because only time and what you do during that time can do that, but I will say this: take all your saddness, frustrations, ect... and put all that energy into your workouts. Remember how good working out makes you feel? The confidence it brings you? And for an added kick, I suggest you having Jessie James's "I look so good (without you)" playing in the background. It will definitely boost your spirits. Sometimes the best revenge is just living and being happy. So go make yourself happy!

Edited by: BUTTERFLIBEAUTY at: 12/24/2011 (20:15)
FEDGIRL4 Posts: 1,916
12/20/11 3:06 P

If it only happened today and if you had feelings for this person, grieve first. Cry if you need to because it helps get the crap out.

Then one foot in front of another.

ARCHIMEDESII SparkPoints: (139,485)
Fitness Minutes: (209,060)
Posts: 20,645
12/20/11 11:32 A

AE2005,

I'm sorry you've had a bad break up, but time does heal all wounds. I know you'd love to dive into the junk, but it won't make things any easier. It won't make the hurt go away. It will only make you feel much more regretful later. Don't let that happen. There are better ways. How about taking a walk ? You may find a brisk walk around the helps. I find walking helps me feel better when I can't seem to think straight. The fresh air would do you some good.

Also, while this guy may not have been the right one, there really are lots of great guys who are. So, as others say, when a door closes, check for an open window.

Don't blame yourself. Things like this happen to us all.

emoticon

IGSBETH SparkPoints: (110,067)
Fitness Minutes: (70,999)
Posts: 3,785
12/20/11 11:26 A

I know, it's the worst. *hugs*

BLACKROSE_222 Posts: 4,797
12/20/11 10:46 A

Food is a temporary fix, and odds are you will end up feeling the exact same when you are done eating - except also have guilt on top of that.

Friends, Family and Fitness are your F-ing friends. Give your Friends and Family a call - they can help you to talk through some of the hurt. For Fitness, go punch something. Seriously, if you have access to a Gym (even if it is just a drop in) go hit up a kickboxing class/punching bag or even take a nice long walk/run. These things CAN help.

YELLOWDAHLIA SparkPoints: (85,787)
Fitness Minutes: (120)
Posts: 12,217
12/20/11 10:09 A

Remember this:
When one door closes, another door opens.

PS- the fact that he broke up with you 5 days before Christmas is a big clue that he's a total jerk anyway...
Take a few days and do what it takes to make yourself feel better..even if it means you have to eat a few cookies.

SWALL84 Posts: 601
12/20/11 9:02 A

Do you have a journal you can write in? Journaling is often very therapeutic.

SP_COACH_NANCY SparkPoints: (158,833)
Fitness Minutes: (112,042)
Posts: 46,222
12/20/11 7:22 A

AE2005,

That must be hard, especially at this time of the year. Just remember that food is not a substitution for us having to go through the emotions of heartache and sadness. This is where writing your feelings down in a journal may help. Also don't forget about the power of exercise. You may be quite surprised what a brisk walk can do for you to make this a little easier. Hang in there.

Coach Nancy

NOSTROMO Posts: 79
12/20/11 6:48 A

I'm sorry to hear about your breakup. I find that getting out of the house to do something -- anything, really helps. Go to the mall and window shop, go for a drive around the nice parts of the city, and listen to your favorite music in the car. I hope you feel better soon.

AE2005 SparkPoints: (29)
Fitness Minutes: (55)
Posts: 2
12/20/11 3:02 A

So I just got broken up with tonight. And all I want to do is eat away my emotions because I really don't have anyone I can talk to about it. I'm afraid I will always feel this lonely, so I turn to food for comfort. Anyone have any advice or words of wisdom on how to power through this?

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