JAZSHIVERS-do not give up- there will be setbacks during this journey, look at it as a learning experience. You have identified something that will trigger emotional eating, next step will be to think of things to to avoid this (many good suggestions already given). Give yourself some slack- yesterday is in the past, look forward to the future and think about what you can do today.
First let me say that I will be praying for your mother. Second let me tell you that I joined this site back in 2009. I was hyped on the weight loss but quickly loss interest because I didn't think this site could help me lose any weight. I didn't use any of the tools that are available and quickly fell back into my routine of bad eating.
I too felt ashamed and convinced myself that I would be alright at the weight I was at. That's when my knees would buckle just walking down a few stairs. Or when my doctor told me that I was pre-diabetic. Don't get me started on the clothes that didn't fit. I still got the emails and the recipes so Spark was always in my view. Last week I had someone who I thought was a friend to tell me that my weight was unattractive...man talk about a blow. It hurt but was the "Spark" I needed to get back up.
Please don't be discouraged...there will always be hurdles or road blocks. If you fall down get back up..that is a sign of a true winner. The fact that you lost 7 lbs in two weeks is amazing! It shows that YOU CAN DO IT! Please don't give up you can do it.
So not a failure. You're just a human being. Stuff happens and we get off track. I have more times than I'd like to admit. You're stopping now and starting over. Let the guild drop. Focus on the moment you're in, not what happened yesterday or last week. You can't change that. You can only change what you do right now.
Fitness Minutes: (12,483)
395 5/15/11 9:29 P
I want to thank you for posting the struggle you are having, I too do not usually post but I am faltering this weekend but reading all of the comments offered up for you gave me a great boost!! I love the last idea about a list of activities in a jar, I am going to go work on that jar RIGHT NOW!! I will have your mother in my prayers, you stay strong. You lost 7 lbs in two weeks, you have what it takes. Have faith in yourself and never give up, no matter what!!! You will make it!
Fitness Minutes: (82,680)
5/15/11 7:28 P
I read a tip one time here on SP about keeping a list on the fridge or a jar by the fridge with options of things you could do for yourself that didn't include food for times when you wanted to eat due to stress. For instance: 1. read 2. paint your nailes 3. take a bath 4. go for a walk 5. call a friend and the list goes on an on with whatever options work for you. If you don't want it taped to the fridge put them on little pieces of paper in the jar and then draw one when you need to.
One of the biggest things I've leaned here in almost two years is that there isn't a single one of us that is perfect. We all stray but the trick to winning long term is to recognize what is happening and get right back on track.
You only fail if you quit! One bad day (or a few bad days) are bound to happen - especially with stress. Just jump back on track when things calm down. For me - I just had finals at school and I ate more crap then I should have and I knew I'd see it on the scale. Well finals are over now and I'm back to tracking my nutrition, getting some movement in and doing my best to be healthy. Will I be perfect? Nope. But no one is. Don't let it stop you - you can do this!
5/14/11 1:53 P
Nobody ever reaches success without any failures along the way. The first thing you need to do is stop beating yourself up about it. Why spend time being upset over something you cannot change. Instead, put your energy in learning how to change what you can. I am very sorry about the situation with your mom. It is very understandable that you are stressed and upset. There are many, many people who eat constantly when they find themselves in stressful situations. I suggest you make a list of things you can do besides eating. Maybe read a book or go for a walk. If you are too distracted to do that, write down your feelings in a journal. Write how frustrated you are about the situation. Write a list of reasons why you want to lose weight, like playing with your kids and tape it to the fridge or somewhere you will see it everyday. Maybe by the time you are reading this, you feel you have done it again, Messed up by a certain time. Well, that's okay. Your entire day doesn't have to be perfect. Maybe you ate badly the whole day, but now it's time for dinner. Well, who says you can't start changing your day at dinner? I know you are upset about the +7 lbs, but focus on the positive thing, which is weight can be lost. That +7 pounds is not permanent. It is temporary! Yes! You have NOT failed yourself or your family. You WANT to change. you know WHAT you need to change and you are aware of your habits. That does not sould like someone who has failed themselves to me. Maybe you failed to eat healthy today so far or maybe you failed to exercise, but you haven't failed yourself. It has only been 3 weeks. This is a slow and steady journey. You will make changes overtime. You will have to work on not eating when you are stressed. I know you are very tired and feel like you have no energy, but sometimes when you are feeling so tired, moving around and exercising can increase your energy. The beginning is the hardest for a lot of people. Remember, "Success is always a work in progess." I hope the situation with your mom gets better. Best of luck. P.S. you are strong enough to do this, you just have to have a little faith in yourself.
Fitness Minutes: (277,123)
5/14/11 1:44 P
You have not failed miserably !! Remember, you're trying to change habits learned over a life time. That won't happen overnight, a week, a month or even a year. Change takes time. Thus the need to be patient with yourself and your body. Don't try to do everything at once or you will end up frustrated. Slow and easy really does win this race.
There are going to be days you eat more than others. There are going to be days when you're not perfect. You know what ? That's okay. You don't have to be perfect to be healthy. If you were to eat right 5 out of 7 days, you'd still be doing better than the average American. This is not an all or nothing situation. Make small changes. Take small steps. Even if the only thing you were to do for yourself today was to drink 8 glasses of water, that's still a positive thing you've done for your health.
Patience, it's a virtue. Be kind to yourself as you would to others. I hope your mom is better.
Fitness Minutes: (58,527)
14,275 5/14/11 12:43 P
Thanks for posting -- as others have said, you definitely haven't failed. Instead, you should celebrate that you got off to such a great start and now want to move forward with your goals after this very difficult setback.
Setbacks like this near the beginning of your journey are VERY common because you're just starting to build healthy habits. As you continue to build momentum, it then gets easier to stay on track -- I promise. EVERYONE will continue to have setbacks though -- all we can do is learn from them and choose to move forward -- which will make us stronger.
It's part of the journey. I have been there a million times and so has everybody else. Trick is to recognize your stressors and find non-food ways to cope. That is a process. Don't give up. Get up, dust yourself off, and plan for your next meal to be healthy. Your body, your mind, and your family will thank you :) You can really do this. Just stick around.
Wishing your mom well, wishing you well. Have an awesome day!
You haven't failed. I'm about to throw this out there, but please pay attention. Breathe.
Things you can't control. You have not failed in the slightest. The only failure is totally giving up. You know you can do it, 7 pounds is an awesome accomplishment. So they're back? Make them go again! I believe you can do it, you KNOW you can. It's not the getting knocked down that is the failure. It's the staying down. There is so much love and support batted around Sparkpeople, you'll be back on track in no time! I wish you the best of luck with your plan, and also for your family.
I started on SparkPeople three weeks ago after a good friend told me about the site. After having my two lovely daughters I have packed on an extra 50 pounds of weight and have been eating unhealthy and barely have the energy to keep up with them (they are two and one). Part of my goal to eat healthy is not only to lose weight but to provide healthy food for my husband and daughters, and stop eating fast food and frozen dinners. I want them to have healthy, fresh food. I want to have energy to keep up with them and not lay on the couch watching them play. It's amazing how exhausting an extra 50 pounds of weight can be on a person. It is so depressing. I have been thinking about losing weight since I had my first daughter but too depressed and scared to do it.
I love the site and the first two weeks went great. I never thought a website could help so much with dieting, but tracking my food intake was amazing! I was suddenly encouraged to eat healthy and excited to stand on the scale. I noticed my mood was better almost right away, along with my energy levels. No more Big Macs for me, and good riddance!! I was eating really healthy and lost 7 pounds over the two weeks. I want to lose 50 pounds by my 30th birthday, which is 7 months away. I was so encouraged, and was sure this was IT! It was finally going to happen for me!
Then last Sunday I had a family emergency. My mom was rushed to the hospital and is still there. I spent all day Sunday/Monday at the hospital and ate unhealthy hospital and fast food. I got home Monday and was completely disgusted with myself, and just kept eating. I am so stressed about my mom and her situation, that I cannot stop eating! Tuesday I told myself I would start over, but by 11am I was stuffing my face with donuts and hamburgers. Every day got worse then the previous, and last night I fell aslep crying because I just don't think I am strong enough to do this. I weighed myself this morning and the 7 pounds are back. I am crying now just thinking about how I have failed myself/my family.
Any advice on how to go on when you have failed so miserably? I don't usually write on message boards or on websites, but I don't want to give up....I just don't know how to go on. I see all of the amazing success stories on here, and I am not sure I am strong enough to be one of them.
THanks for listening, maybe just typing out my thoughts can help...
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