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Ashes Ashes We All Fall Down



 
 
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CNAUER
Posts: 2
12/20/12 11:40 A

Thank you for posting this. I really needed it today. The holidays are here and so is the holiday baking in my house - which means cookies and other unhealthy choices are in an abundant supply. It would be easier if they were not given away as gifts each year! I try to stay strong but I also give in a little bit each day because I know if I don't I will eventually say screw it and eat everything in sight.

This year has been tough for me. Last year I was working out on a regular basis until the end of the year when the schedule conflicts pulled me out of the gym. I work, I am a student, and I am a single parent. Finding time during finals last year pulled me out of my routine but I still found time once a week to go to the gym. I quit going - it was me that gave up.

I started struggling right away with trying to get back into the habit of fitness. In January I had an intense workout. It was normal for me to push the limits when I was working out on a regular basis but in January I was no longer working out that often. I wound up with a foot injury.

I never gave up on the possibility that I would one day be able to make it through an entire workout. I have been trying all year. Each workout resulted in too much pain for me to even finish that specific workout and lingering pain that would prevent me from trying again. But, I never gave up. And then December came.

I finally made it through an entire workout without pain! I am back on track again - minus the cookies. I can workout again and I am bringing a new level of motivation with me, one that was lacking before. I also bring a sense of caution with me. I am willing to try new things that are harder but I often take options now and work towards that intensity.

So far I have lost 5 lbs (my weigh in day is Sunday), but I have yet to lose the 15 lbs I gained back from not being able to workout for most of the year. That is something I am working on forgiving myself for.



OUT-OF-ASHES
SparkPoints: (36,858)
Fitness Minutes: (25,421)
Posts: 1,160
12/20/12 10:06 A

I have spent the greater part of 2012 being active. Active physically at home and at the gym. Active mentally, learning new ways to eat, how to train, how to cope, and what to do with my time. Active emotionally, delving deeper into my psyche to gain access to why I am overweight and being emotionally available for friends and family both in the physical world and in the Spark world.
Needless to say it's been a pretty busy year. Many gains and losses. In all I have lost over 60 pounds and went from obese to overweight. That is the positive that I choose to take away from the struggle. Like with anything that is truly worth it, the process is painful and hard. But if it's worth it, don't you owe it to yourself to give it a try?
Some have looked at all I've been through and all that I have done to get to where I am and can't wrap their brain around it. They say "good for you, but I don't have your discipline and patience." To them I say, start small and keep going. How do you convince someone so sure of their own inevitable failure that if they were to just keep going, they would reach their goal eventually? Time is the real issue. Yes, you will make poor choices and have tiny failures along the way, but if you don't give up you will get stronger, better, and faster.
Today, I hopped on the scale and saw that I had gained 9 pounds since last week. That's not something that deflates my world anymore. I know now that I made poor eating choices and that on top of it, my body is retaining water. I know that if I turn it around and do better for myself, this time next week I will probably lose all of that plus a pound. That is just the way things are.
So get excited about your achievements, don't dwell on your let downs, and never give up!



 
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