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Any long distance relationship advice



 
 
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ARIVER11
Posts: 14
1/7/13 2:16 P

Hello fellow long-distance people :-)

My boyfriend is Austrian, and we've been doing some sort of distance for the better part of 4.5 years. We met in the US, where we had nearly a year together, but were separated by thousands of miles when I stayed in the US to wrap up my Bachelor's and he returned home to finish his. That was a tough year! After that, I got a Master's and then a job in Berlin, which is much closer but still a distance that prevents us from seeing each other as often as we'd like. This summer, though, he is probably moving to Berlin and we'll finally close that gap. As many of you said: it's hard but it's definitely worth it!

I often used the weeks I was away from my boyfriend as a time to concentrate on myself and work towards fitness goals. I made up a little "days left until we see each other again" calendar that I posted up in my apartment (I live alone so no one thought I was weird ;)). I would strike off each day as it passed AND would write what exercise I'd done that day. It felt like I was closing in on two things I really wanted: to see my boyfriend and to be fit and healthy!

Right now I'm in the US and will next see my boyfriend in 32 days. I've been on a great health kick and want to continue it until then. By then, hopefully these little changes I've been making are well ingrained as habits.

How long until you guys get to see your significant others again? Maybe we can keep this thread alive and motivate one another :-)



PINTASUVIDA
Posts: 110
12/4/12 11:53 P

I also recently moved to Japan. Distance is never easy, but it's so worth it. Also skype is crap. I hate it so much, but still have no other choice than to really use it. If you both have iphones u can facetime for free. and the quality is amazing! I've been doing that recently with my fiance and its easier to be supportive and have support when ur not worried about a bad connection. I've lost 16 pounds since moving. I dont have a care anymore so biking and walking is my exercise. Even if you gained weight from being home, just realize hey its food u cant get where you are! Just get back on track, and remember true love withstands anything, including distance. emoticon



CHYNNA81
Posts: 1,051
11/27/12 9:14 P

Wow Perry glad all went well on your trip. How much did you lose in time for your trip?



PERRY77
SparkPoints: (556)
Fitness Minutes: (30)
Posts: 3
11/14/12 12:41 A

thank you all for the support, i just got back tonight from visiting her and all my friends and family in my hometown, she was shocked by how much weight i lost and so was all my friends and family, of course you cant go back home to visit and not gain weight lol. between the good down home cookin' and the lack of excercise i gained about 7 pounds from the week long visit, it wont take me long to get back on track though. it did alot of good to see her and everyone else.



HEZZYLUNA
Posts: 129
11/8/12 4:03 P

Perry, I know you're struggle all too well!

My fiancÚ and I were friends for a year before we started "going out," and the week we became exclusive, I moved halfway across the country for a job, and we stayed long distance for the next 10 months. And let me tell you, it is HHAARRDD! But you already know that.

The good thing is it sounds like you guys are pretty solid, so I don't doubt that you'll make it through. Honestly, the best advice I can give is to try not to think about all the ways it sucks. In retrospect, I look back on the 10 months my fiancÚ and I were long distance and while I know it was hard, that's honestly not what I remember. I remember my family making fun of me ALL THE TIME because we talked on the phone literally every chance we got, many times we'd fall asleep on the phone together. Because that was the worst part, I do remember that. That time when it's late and you have to go to sleep but you don't want to hang up the phone because then they're gone and you're alone again in your own bed and they're not there anymore.

And you can still celebrate with her. When we were long distance, there were no ipads or skype, and smart phones weren't really all that popular yet, so we didn't even send a single picture mail or video chat once or anything. But now, you guys can skype and video chat and what-not, so you should do that!

I wish you guys the very best!



CHYNNA81
Posts: 1,051
11/7/12 7:25 P

Hang in there PERRY and focus on your weightloss goals as motivation. My fiancÚ is also very far away and he does not have a personal computer to skype so we text all the time. We have been together for almost 2 years now and this is how it's always been for us. I go visit every 4 months.

I focus on my weight and personal goals and he does the same to stay busy. I know it's hard but you will make it. emoticon



MANDIETERRIER1
Posts: 13,064
11/6/12 12:46 P

I agree use Skype.

These relationships can work out. Before Skype and when long distance calls were too expensive, if they existed. My parents had a long distance relationship. They wrote to each other. And this December they will celebrate their 50th Anniversary.



MICNJ43
SparkPoints: (4,262)
Fitness Minutes: (6,126)
Posts: 54
11/6/12 10:56 A

Do you have acces to Skype. A guy at work used it to talk to his kid. She was in the Phillipeans and he was in Las Vegas. She was his life and he was very happy to have the communication tool. Might be worth a look see. Other than that, good luck to you. Mine was 2000 miles and just fizzled and then self destructed. I hope you have more success.



LILISUPERHERO
Posts: 195
11/6/12 5:14 A

I am currently 8000 miles away from my boyfriend, in Japan. In the 3.5 years we've been together, we had never spent more than a week apart, but I've been away since the end of August, and won't see him until I return back to the states next May. I have used not seeing him as MORE motivation to lose weight. He is still my go-to weightloss buddy via skype, and he helps me keep on track by asking how it's going everytime we talk. I find myself staying on track just so I don't have to tell him the bad news that I didn't stick with my goals. But overall, my goal is to have dropped between 30 and 35 pounds (I've lost 17 so far) by the time I next see him in person, and that's motivation to be a brand-new sexy person who will be much more comfortable in my own skin around him.

It's a curse to be apart, but you can also make it into a near-blessing by using the fact that you don't see each other as motivation to make a big impression the next time you do!



PERRY77
SparkPoints: (556)
Fitness Minutes: (30)
Posts: 3
11/5/12 11:36 P

I am currently 3000 miles away from my bride to be and it is tough on us but we have no doubt that we will make it through, the hardest part is staying motivated, I have lost 70 pounds and I still have a little more to go but it is hard when there is nobody there to celebrate it with me. And the phone calls do not do justice compared to face to face conversation, I finally get to see her tomorrow and all I can think about is after this week it will be another 6 months apart. Does anybody have any advice on how to stay motivated. We will only see each other 3 more times before our wedding next August.



 
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