I was 182 and lost over 50 pounds. I believe the skin will shrink with your weightloss as long as the weight loss is gradual and that you are incorporating exercise. Exercise will help your skin retain its elasticity.
You say you're afraid of losing weight, afraid of success. It is normal but you clearly want a healthier lifestyle if you are on Spark People. Take your time. Incorporate small, permanent changes. Use SP website, message boards (like you're doing), blogs (both reading them and writing them). Look for support outside your family. Church, friends who want to get healthy with you or have started, and Spark friends.
You are not alone in this journey. Many of us are struggling or have struggled like you.
Don't give up!