Thanks everyone for the encouragent. Floridita, I think we are on the same page. I'm also looking at my 20-year law school reunion coming up, and not wanting to go, for the exact same reason! I don't know why, it's not like I was thin in law school...people probably wouldn't recognize me if I showed up thin! I'm trying to keep in my mind that I have to start from where I am, and where I am right now is here. I am obsessive and impatient by nature, but that doesn't change the road I have to travel, just my experience of it. I just want to see results the way I want them, not the way nature is giving them to me. And that, I think, is my lesson to learn here. :) Thanks for you kindness, sisters in this journey!
Fitness Minutes: (28,630)
523 3/28/14 1:43 P
I know exactly how you feel! I have lost a total of 50 pounds since I started my weight loss journey, 15 of those pounds since I joined Spark in January and began tracking. I went out to dinner with friends and I gained 3 pounds. It has taken me a week and a half to lose 2 of the pounds but I feel so demoralized even though I know it is a journey....a long journey towards my goal. I know I will likely have to track forever if I want to keep the weight off, it is so easy for the pounds to creep back up. I still have 30 pounds to go but it is getting harder and when the scale starts to go in the wrong direction I want to scream. But Eelpie is right, there are so many different things to consider and fluctuations are going to be a reality.
I played in a tennis tournament a few weeks ago and my partner and I took home the silver. Of course they took pictures of us all and I was on such a high after our performance until I saw the picture. Not only did I look fat and ugly, I looked old and haggard. (I know, I know I had just played a gruelling tennis match). I need to get over myself but the picture was put on the tennis players website. Even when we are fat and old we can still be so vain!
I am hoping to lose another 10 pounds by the end of May...a big goal and I may fall short but I am determined to do the best I can. My 30 year law school alumni reunion is May 30th and I want to really look my best. I skipped the 20 year reunion because I felt too fat and ugly, this time I want to rock it! But here is the kicker, whenever I have an event or goal like this, I seem to sabotage myself and end up gaining. This will be my biggest test of my mettle, to see if I can stay on track until the end of May and beyond.
Don't be discouraged, you have come so far and you are doing all the right things for success. Keep coming here for support, we all know what you are going through and knowing that there are people who understand does really help. Your morale will go up and down, this is part of the process too, learning to cope with the ups and downs can be as important as eating right and exercising. Hang in there and remember each day is a new day.
for losing 30 lbs!! I think a lot of us have hit a week, where we get on the scale and the number that it shows does not match how we feel. We feel stronger or leaner or thinner or our pants are a little looser.... and the scale says we've gained (or not lost, or only lost a tenth of a pound). That's one of the reasons why it's a good idea to also take your measurements, and maybe gauge your progress with a pair of pants or a skirt that's a little tight. Try them on every so often and see if they're fitting looser. And also, things like you mentioned-- are you feeling stronger, have more endurance for the bike, etc.
The way I look at it-- no, your body is not your enemy. The basic science says if you consume less calories than your body requires, you will lose weight. There's all those other factors in there.... water retention from sodium, hormone changes, muscles require extra fluid for the repair/rebuild process. Also, food has weight and maybe our bowels are a little sluggish. It's sort of complicated. Over the short term, it may look like it's not working.
But over the long term.... this is an extreme example-- no one in a prison camp who doesn't get enough food, stays fat or gains weight. Not a single one of those holocaust survivors was fat. Period. The science works. A few weeks may seem like a long time, but it really isn't.
If you're tracking ALL your food and staying within your ranges (and taking exercise into account, when determining an appropriate range) the science says over the long haul, you will lose. Even if you don't eat enough, you'll lose but maybe slower and feel crappy and tired while you do it.
Maybe (if you're not doing so) add sodium to the nutrients you track, in case you were eating a lot of high-sodium foods affecting the water retention. You didn't mention any strength training, so I'll suggest you add some of that to your exercise. And-- I read this in a book a while back-- wear red. It's a power color. The suggestion was that when we're feeling low, is the exact time we need to feel powerful. I don't often wear red, but when I'm "feeling" thin but the scale doesn't agree-- I dig out that old red sweater or a red shirt, and slap it on. I AM powerful. I CAN do this.
I'm having trouble taking my own advice today. About a week and a half ago, I was feeling good, noticing the changes in my body, and feeling stronger, physically, than I have in a long time. I've lost almost 30 pounds, and that's something to be happy about, and I was. Then...one of my friends posted a photo of me on Facebook, and oh my god. All I can see is how far I still have to go. It really took the wind out of my sails. But, I pulled it together, and doubled down in the following week, swimming and riding the bike, and being very strict about my eating. And yesterday, I got on the scale for the first time in a couple weeks, and I had gained a pound. Gained. I know it's one stupid pound, and maybe it's muscle or water or hormones or whatever. I know all that rationally. But emotionally....I'm on the ledge. I really feel like my body is my enemy, and nothing I do, no matter how hard I work, is ever going to change it. Even if I do change it by force, it's going to find a way to change back, into something even worse, if it can.
If someone else told me this story, I would know exactly what to say to them. I know I'm playing a long game, and one snapshot in time is pretty meaningless, and overall, I'm doing well. I know this. But, today....I'm not feeling it. My head and my heart are not on the same page.
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