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THELUCKIEST018 SparkPoints: (8,655)
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Posts: 858
5/15/11 3:54 P

I agree w/the poster who said to have the doctor play the "bad guy." Sit with your daughter and have her talk to the doctor, so you can both hear what he says and explains why it is bad. I think a trip to the school therapist wouldn't hurt either.

I have two kids and I know the whining can drive me nuts, but stick to your guns. Let her throw a fit. The only reason she keeps doing it is because she knows it works. You have to be stronger than she is.

Also, why is she eating at 10pm? I would think a 6 year old should be in bed by 8 (9 at the latest). I would work on getting her to bed at a normal time. if she doesn't eat past, say, a bedtime snack around 7 -- in the morning she will be hungry for breakfast. Maybe part of why she doesn't eat breakfast is because she goes to bed stuffed, she is not hungry in the am.

LKISINSATIABLE Posts: 382
5/11/11 5:45 P

This sounds like an emotional thing. I would take her to the pediatrician. Something is definitely amiss if she eats until she vomits, let alone asks for more right after vomiting. As for breakfast, maybe she's just not hungry in the morning. Sometimes people need to wake up before they recognize they're hungry. My kid won't eat unless she's been fully awake for at least a half hour. That being said, my pediatrician (my daughter's now 3) told me NEVER to force her to eat, and to also allow her to eat when or if she's hungry, lest she end up with a misdeveloped sense of hunger... so I offer meals and snacks at set times, don't force her to eat, and also let her eat whenever she says she's hungry. I just only offer her healthful foods, which isn't a problem since she loves raw fruits and veggies, and there's no such thing as too much of those. She has always been underweight, though. My hunch is that your daughter is craving attention and reassurance, so I would give her more. With multiple kids, there will always be times when one kid will need more attention than the others, and that's okay. emoticon

BURNINGEMBER SparkPoints: (10,999)
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Posts: 545
5/11/11 2:49 P

I thought of something else that may work...put the negativity on the doctor instead of you. You could take her to the doctor and explain the situation and have the doctor tell her exactly how much she should be eating, like the calorie range we all have reccomended for us here on spark. Then it becomes the health professionals rules for her health, not "mom being mean" as a six year old would see it. Then help her track her calories, write it all down and add it up for her and when she's reached the top end of her range, that's it for the day. It isn't easy to deal with a demanding child, I know. Consistency is the key with my own children.

There are hormonal disorders that screw up hunger and fullness cues, they are rare but it is a possibility. It's worth checking into with the doctor. I hope you're able to figure out how to help her...I can imagine how difficult it must be for her, and as a mom nothing is worse than watching your children struggle...

MLMOORE1341 SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 2
5/11/11 2:07 P

I try to have structured meals, my husband misses some because of work, but she constantly whines for food. I tell her when she can have dinner and snacks, but she comes up to me when I say 15 minutes until dinner (I do a count down) and she asks if she can have food to wait for dinner. It gets to the point that she kicks and yell at bed time for over an hour and wakes the other kids up. I'm going to try and talk to the school therapist to see what she thinks.

BURNINGEMBER SparkPoints: (10,999)
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Posts: 545
5/11/11 12:42 P

I'm not trying to be harsh, but she is the child, you are the parent. YOU are responsible for what she is given to eat, when she eats it, and how much. If she shows unhealthy eating patterns, YOU need to take control of the situation. If she whines, so what? Kids have many tactics to try to get their way, and it does NOT do them any good if you don't stick to your guns. 10 pm is way too late of an eating cutoff time for a 6 year old, in my opinon. She should be eating structured meals and snacks so she knows what to expect. She's trying to emotionally manipulate both of you with the "hateful" outbursts and attention seeking. It sounds as though she has much deeper issues and has already developed a very unhealthy emotional eating pattern, which if you don't handle it now will only get worse. I think counseling would be in order, and I would make small changes that lead up to a healthier eating plan for her.

SPARKCHANTAL SparkPoints: (112,662)
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5/11/11 5:43 A

wow, this is really something.
just got back from a presentation about eating disorders. BUT this is usually not before puberty! your daughter definitely shows signs of it, not eating for a long stretch, and then overdoing it to the point of regurgitation.
causes? can't say. some mother-child relation issue, most likely, because 'food' is the basic connection in beginning stages.... just a thought;
what can you do? hmmm.
this is tough. get nutritional and/or professional counseling

what i'd do is first: take time for a good breakfast
second: plan: decide on what / how much to eat that week/day, discuss the results (lovingly) with your daughter, making clear where the limits are as to how much she may consume,
third: stick to it, sounds to me like for a loooooong time, if not permanently.

i read somebody's blog here about compulsive eating, she even ate while she was asleep! needless to say, she was in the 300 lb-range.

whatever.... act you must.


MLMOORE1341 SparkPoints: (0)
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Posts: 2
5/10/11 7:09 P

I have a 6 year old daughter, a 2 1/2 yr old daughter, and a 16 month old son. My Two youngest ones are from the relationship I am in now and are eating normally and are a little solid, not really fat, but big for their age, both height and weight. My six year old's father is short and skinny. I am 5'9" and a little heavy. My six year old, Pandora, eats constantly. She doesn't always eat breakfast, no matter what I offer her, but eats in school and from the moment she gets home until she goes to sleep. It doesn't matter what she eats, she actually loves veggies, even lima beans, and canned spaghetti and ramen noodles. She has been known to eat until she throws up on a few occasions, but immediately ask for more food. My husband (who has been "daddy" since she was 2) give her the same amount of attention as the other two, but still "hates daddy" and says she hates me and I don't give her enough attention when I don't immediately fuss over her if I am busy. She also calls herself ugly sometimes. Can this be an eating disorder? It gets to the point of me telling her there will be no more food for the night at 10 pm and she will wine until later sometimes. She had day-night reversal once, I had to use melatonin before it was fixed. She is very smart (ahead of her class with math and vocabulary) and I just can't take her asking for food every fifteen minutes, even after huge meals. What can I do?

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