  |
|
|
|
| That sounds like a really good idea! Maybe you can both start a business catering! Good luck - sounds like a good plan! 2008 to start a new endeavor!
|
|
|
|
| yeah that's what he needs. alot of people are encouraging to start catering, we use to cook food and deliver to my job and everyone keeps asking about it. This year he is going to start that and maybe that can grow into something bigger that he is charge of.
|
|
|
|
| Wow - he was a Marine and is not disciplined about working? Maybe he needs something that he can be in charge about. So he can control the situation, maybe that is why he is getting bored so fast with his jobs.
|
|
|
|
| you are so right, yeah the problem is not him finding a job, he is a very unstable person. When he gets bored he is quitting, he isn't good with taking orders, so that's another downfall. He was a Marine and he likes to be in charge.
|
|
|
|
| Oh my goodness again! Ten jobs in a few years? Wow - well at least I will say he does go back out there. He needs to get back out there again! There should be no reflection on his manhood because he stays at home. That is another thing about men - their machoism.
|
|
|
|
| we tried the stay at home part for about 6 months, but then he complained about his manhood, so we put the baby in daycare and since 03 my husband hashad about 10 jobs.
|
|
|
|
| Thats something that sounds like he would be better off if he quits working after a short period of time. Or maybe you could win big on taking those bets!
|
|
BUTTERFLY262
12/31/07 2:32 P
|
|
|
|
He could be a stay at home dad. I would love it. However, he would fail fast. If we do go that route... we all can take bets out on how long he would last.... humm that would be interesting 
|
|
|
|
A husband is always like having another child - lol!  They whine and complain - but to them it isn't whining and complaining. All I hear is, I work hard, blah, blah. He is only 41 and is already acting like he is going to collapse.
|
|
|
|
| Well at least he does some stuff - but really, you shouldn't have to ask him to do anything. If he has a hard time with working - he should be a stay at home dad - to all of your kids and do the cooking and cleaning. But I know they are all a bit of whiners - some more than other - and always have some issue.
|
|
|
|
| sorry to hear about your daughter, that must be tough to deal with. Your husband will be involved more when your son is a little older and can do things, that's when the men get excited and more attentive. sometimes having a husband is like having another child in the house.
|
|
BUTTERFLY262
12/31/07 2:13 P
|
|
|
|
| Yes, my husband works, weekdays and I work weekdays and a day during the weekend (a 12 hour shift 7 to 7). When I work the overnight shift he sleeps like a rock and when I work the day shift he messes up the apartment. I try really hard and the sad thing is that he wanted a child more than life. I have known my husband for several years before we dated and that is all that he talked about, you would think that he be happy and more helpful. This all just breaks me up inside because I had a daughter several years ago (past marriage) who died of cancer. Life is short, happiness is important and he is stupid.
|
|
|
|
| i don't have time. he is only the father to the last 3, we got married in 02 and had my 5 year old in dec 02, i was pregnant for twins that where alot of the weight gain came from, the i had triston i lost a little weight then i had my daughter and it's been downhill from there. My husband is like Jekyll and Hyde, he can be very attentive and cooperative at times ans then he is awful. he is a wonderful cook he cleans the house better than me, but getting him to do it is a chore in itself.
|
|
|
|
| Oh thats terrible! You are working two jobs with a ten month old? Hang in there! That is very lazy of him! He shouldn't be sleeping at all during the day while watching the baby. Does he work?
|
|
|
|
| hopefully he has more common sense that that, but men are so good at tuning the kids out, it's ridculous.
|
|
BUTTERFLY262
12/31/07 1:54 P
|
|
|
|
| What is the deal with the husbands not feeding the kids(however, he does not miss a meal)? My son is 10 months and he does not have the patiences when he is playful. The problem is that I work very hard (as we all do)and more than pull my weight around the home in all areas. He is just lazy. The one thing that makes me the craziest is when he is supposed to be watching the baby and he is sleeping. I am calling the house when I am at work (at my second job ont the weekends) and the phone just rings and rings. I am praying that my son is not home screaming his head off... and he could be since my spouse does not hear the phone when it is ringing off of the hook,
|
|
|
|
| Oh my gosh - that is horrible! He isn't nice to you at all! I would freak on him! Five kids and a working mom - God Bless you! 2008 should be happy changes for you! You are a saint!
|
|
|
|
| i have a 12, 9, 5, and 3 yrd old boy and a 2 year old girl. my husband just doesn't realize that you have to feed them sometimes; lol, he sits around all day playing his video games and he will let them paly or he'll send them to the basement to play, then when i get home i have to cook, clean do laundry and whatever else my kids need done. If i say i need to stop at the store to pick something up he has a fit.
|
|
|
|
| Oh my goodness! How old are your kids? Mine are just 12 and almost 10. I started to work part-time on the weekends when my daughter was about 4 1/2 and I remember my husband actually being upset and mad at me because he had to take care of them. One time he almost hung up on me on the phone because he had to warm chicken nuggets up in the microwave! AUGGGHHH!
|
|
|
|
| they are definaetly related, when i go to work on the weekends, i usually leave before they wake up and i'll call at 9 and he says "oh they aren't hungry" when i call back and speak to my older son they all are starving.
|
|
|
|
| You are funny! They do sound very similar! Mine is home today with the kids and my daughter is texting me - mind you, only about 1/2 hour ago - that she is hungry. Finally - I think he is making them something to eat.
|
|
|
|
Our husbands must be related; 
|
|
|
|
| Amen I say to that! I am the same - very bottom heavy and I have been having a lot of problems with my feet, and varicose veins, and pysatica - with the back. All weight related. And I know he is the type that if anything were to happen to me - he sure isn't going to help me in anyway. Definitely a selfish character flaw!
|
|
|
|
| that's true, i am all about getting healthy, i am very bottom heavy so walking is becoming difficult and my feet hurt alot. i can longer let my husband get in my way.
|
|
|
|
| no - he shouldn't be spending any money. I know what you mean about giving up - I do that with my husband sometimes too - it's like why bother. But I am bothering taking care of myself - that I can control!
|
|
|
|
| He needs to get active in the house too - and work. That is ridiculous. My husband never helped either but I was a stay at home mom for about nine years so it was my responsibility while he went to work. But now he is dependent on that and I still have to do mostly everything even though I work full time as well.
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 12:02 P
|
|
|
|
| i got tired of arguing so now i don't say much, he is currently working pt, and i am in control of the money. he does all of the driving so i think he feels that he can spend whatever he wants.
|
|
|
|
| Thats not right of him. He needs to get out and work and stay at work! If you are okay with working - than yes, make him stay home. You are the breadwinner - than you should make the diecisions like that. He has no right bringing any Goodies home or spending any money if most of the work - home and out - is up to you.
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 11:58 A
|
|
|
|
| i love excercising, i have a treadmill and eliptical, i walked up and down the stairs everyday, but i can't find the time to be consistent with it. my husbands idea of taking care of the kids is sending them to their room until i am done, so if i start excercising i have to stop to get some juice for them or help my daughter in the potty and then i lose motivation
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 11:55 A
|
|
|
|
| my husband is just very selfish, he is worse that my kids. i am the breadwinner in my house, my husband is the type that gets bored with a job and then quits, i told him to stay home with the little kids so i don't have to pay daycare, but that didn't work either. i am hoping that this year changes him also.
|
|
|
|
| I definitely need to exercise. I am always putting it off. I want to lose a little more and then I think in the spring I am going to start walking a bit. I need to lose some first because I was getting so bad - I would get out of breath very easily or too many things would hurt just in normal physical activity, never mind exercising.
|
|
|
|
| I know all of what you are coming from. My husband can be very demeaning. My husband is just all talk about needing to get the weight off. I have basically raised my kids without his help, although, financially he is a very hard worker. That I will give him. Other than that, nothing. So, I hear you!
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 11:31 A
|
|
|
|
| maybe you can work out in the morning before everyone wakes up and make sure you eat right. This is a hard road, it's very easy to put on weight but it is so hard to take it off; lol
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 11:29 A
|
|
|
|
| that's why joing this site was a blessing, it makes me accountable for my actions, i like having to log what i eat and how much water i drink, i like having other people that have the same goals as me for support and advice.
|
|
|
|
| Oh - no - you have to drink more water - thats very important. Coffee and teas that are caffienated actually are diuretics taking some fluid out of your body with them. Try flavored selzers if you dont' like water.
|
|
BUTTERFLY262
12/31/07 11:23 A
|
|
|
|
| My husband is not supportive at all. He is all talk with no assistance. He never gives me time for the gym and at home he does not help with our 10 month old so that I can workout at home. Our son is going through a stage were he does not want to go to sleep and I tend to fall asleep with him after 11:00pm leaving just enough time for a shower and to take out clothes for myself and the baby for work. tomorrow. Help!
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 11:21 A
|
|
|
|
| i drink oj only to take my iron pills, then that's it, my problem is I don't like anything else, so i don't drink enough fluids thru out the day, i'll have a cup of coffee in the morning maybe a cup of water or 2throughout the day and that's it.
|
|
|
|
| You are better off with no soda anyway, but try to stay away from juices because they hold a high content of natural sugars. water and maybe diet iced teas - like green teas are good.
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 11:12 A
|
|
|
|
| i hate all diet sodas, i am addicated to coca cola classic, i have drastically cut down, i am retraining my taste buds to juice and water. if i can't drink coke i won't drink any soda, which is a good thing.
|
|
|
|
| Okay - switch to diet caffiene free coca cola. I treat myself to that - because I am trying to watch all of the sugar substitute stuff as well. Let him drink the coke - ask him to bring home diet next time!
|
|
AURORA26
12/31/07 11:08 A
|
|
|
|
| that's funny, coca cola is my weakness and he'll come home with a 24 pack; lol
|
|
|
|
| Yeah - that is no help. Although maybe he subconsciously wants you to stay the way you are. But that is his issue and I say - be strong! And look away from whatever Goodies he brings home. He doesn't live in your body - you do! Let him eat the goodies!
|
|
|
|
| Aurora, my husband is kind of like that. He says he'll be supportive & then comes home with all kinds of Goodies I can't resist! He is no help at all.
|
|
|
|
| Hang in there! My husband is just about only good for telling me I am overweight and that I should do something about it. He works very hard at his own job - about 60 - hours a week and occasional house stuff like the lawn or whatever big needs to be done. But that is it. I don't get day by day help at all. I am a working mom that runs my kids all around. It gets really hard but I am trying. I know I have only myself right now to get the weight off, and I know that is what will make me feel better so I am trying and you can do it too!
|
|
|
|
| thanks, i have tried to assign chores to my older boys, i will try to offer rewards and see if that helps. My husband knows how important it is to me, we have had so many conversations about it. he always says i'll support you, then when i ask him to pitch in with the kids or housework, he always says he'll get to it and doesn't. I am just going to try to stay focus.
|
|
SCITEACH4U
12/31/07 9:29 A
|
|
|
|
| I am with you. Mine can be a real piece of something I am not going to say. He is also not supportive. I am sick, have kids and a job. I can barely do it and sometimes cant get it all done. His answer, he wants me to stop working!!!
|
|
|
|
| Well first of all, I commend you on staying sane with such a big family! Kudos! Next, have you told your husband how much this means to you? Maybe if he knows how incredibly important this is for you, he'll help a little more. Also, perhaps have your kids pitch in and help with the housework. Make it fun. Create a grab bag and have them each pull out a paper and it would be their job for the day. You can include washing the dishes, clearing the table after dinner, feeding the pets, taking out the trash, putting their own laundry away, etc... And maybe have some sort of rewards for them...like family movie night or boss for the day. The more fun they have helping, the more they'll WANT to help and the more time YOU have to do what you want and need to do! Good luck! I hope it works out.
|
|
|
|
| the last week i have tried to change some of my eating habits and excercise more. normally my husband would help with the household chores, now he doesn't want to do anything, if i wake up early to work out, i realize that there is so much household stuff to do that i do that instead. any advice on trying to balance everything. i am a mother of a 12,9,5,3 and 2 year old, i work fulltime sometimes 40+ hours.
|
|
