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THEBETTERJO
8/1/07 6:53 A
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| My boys visit my exhusband a lot. Some days I feel they would rather be with him than me, and I get down. However, I am always reminded that they do love me and need me in different ways. For example, if they get sick while staying with dad, they will come home to be with mama.
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KATELYNN2000
7/25/07 11:09 P
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I've been through the same thing!! Only when I had to do it, we had just finished going through a BIG ordeal with CPS and I was having to turn my child over the person who'd caused the problem in the first place!! It was horrible!!! I spent so much time crying, then praying, then crying again!! That was 8 years ago! Now my baby just turned 10 and he goes to see his dad all the time and has a great relationship with his stepmom, which I wouldn't change if I could!!
I worried SOOOO much that he'd like his dad better than me, since he's the playmate and I'm the parent! Or that he'd get TOO close to his stepmom!! HASN"T HAPPENED!!! In fact, just today, I had to actually explain to my little boy why it's a GOOD thing that my husband is going to adopt the three older kids and not him! THeir father is a deadbeat!! THey asked for the adoption themselves and he actually felt left out!! SO I had to explain to him why having 4 parents who love him and want to take care of him is better than this adoption! Speaking as an adoptee myself, I understand why they want it and why he was upset, but it really IS best that his dad is in his life!!!
Just watch out for your son! As long as he's taken care of and not harmed, let him enjoy himself!! It will never lessen the bond he has with you, in fact, it could actually make it stronger in the long run!!!
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| Thanks i can see what your both saying, today he spent 2 hours with his dad alone without me ( i felt sick the whole time) luckily i was at work so had things to keep me occupied. my mum said he came back heppy and full of what he had done with his brother and sister ( the ex's kids) so i feel a litt;e better now. i suppose it will all get easier the more we do it and this way i dont have to spend time with the ex anymore.
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| As long as he's a decent man and won't physically hurt your son then I would TRY to consider it a blessing....he'll have 2 families who love him and you'll get some time for yourself....and I agree with 2catperson that NOONE can replace a mommy!!!
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2CATPERSON
7/16/07 1:09 P
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| nothing can replace a mother. Think back to your own parents, mom was always extra special. Good Luck and remember MOMS RULE
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SAMMIE841
7/16/07 10:15 A
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| Thanks its nive to know how other people deal with situations like this. I can see how you feel to, mind you my son is only going 20 mins down the road not a whole flight away.
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SHMOOPYGIRL
7/15/07 12:56 P
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| I just dropped off my daughter (she's 5) at the airport to fly solo to Las Vegas to spend 2 weeks with her father. He calls her maybe once a week, and flies her out to see him 4 times a year. This trip they are going to Germany and Switzerland for 2 weeks. She has never been away from me for this long...usually when he takes her he does for 4 days or so. So yes, I feel your pain. But know deep inside that your child is somehow protected. That's my mantra. That's what keeps me sane during these times. As for your son loving him more...I'm sorry, but it just can't happen. YOUR his mom, and there's nothing more precious than that.
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SAMMIE841
7/15/07 11:26 A
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| My ex has recently introduced himself into our son's life, he's only 2 and half but loves spending time with his daddy. the trouble is ive now come to a cross roads, he wants to take our son out on his own and to be with the family he has now. I feel anxious about it and wonder if i should trust him, i feel like my son might not want me anymore (silly perhaos ey) has anyone had to do this ??
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