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MILLFULLER
5/23/07 1:43 P
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| Thanks for the suggestion! It worked. She actually gave me a compliment on the weight I have lost.
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CHUNKAMUNKA
3/30/07 11:46 P
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Tell her that her weight loss really brings out her wrinkles LOL
No, don't do that, I was only joking.
Why don't you just be straight with her and tell her that it is a topic you wish to ban from conversation for 3 months. Then you can renegotiate with her at the three month point, after telling her how much more you appreciate the relationship now that she doesn't mention your weight.
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I hear you totally. My whole life my mom has said something about my weight. She has never really had a weight problem, she has always weighed about 125. When I was in high school I weighed 135 and that was to much for her. Looking back at pictures I looked great. My husband and I moved are family to Florida 8 mths ago and I have gained over 30 pounds. I was talking to her last week and she is so depressed that she weighs 140 now since she is in menapause. I told her how much I weighed and she said "Oh my gosh, how can that be!!!". Real supportive!! I just try to keep trugging along and ignore what anyone says. My weight is not what it says, I am 185 right now.
Michele
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MILLFULLER
3/29/07 5:50 P
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I think you maybe right. I need to tell her ways that she can be supportive. Every thing I tell her I am going to do she vetoes with something she wants me to do. I need to tell her how hurtful that is to me. This makes me not want to share anything going on with my weight loss with her.
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LONELYHOPE
3/27/07 8:19 P
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| My mother tries to be supportive, but like yours its not helpful when it makes me feel like $h!t. I think its important to communicate how you feel about it to her, she's not psychic and she may think her words are helpful when they are hurtful instead. Be open and honest with her and tell her how she can better support you (maybe babysitting so you can work out longer). Maybe she's looking for a way to be supportive and just fumbling around a bit. It happens, nobody's perfect. And, she's your mom, if you can't be open and honest with your mom who can you open up to?
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SAMANTHAKNY
3/24/07 4:07 P
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| I know what you mean, both my parents are always seccond guessing my food choices. It's a simple; "are you ure you want to eat that." or "is that all you exercise." While I know that they mean to help it really does do the exact opposite, does'nt it? My mother as well also isn't the thinnest person eiter, and her healthy habbits are relativly new. I found it very helpful to explain to them that while I know they are trying to help, it would be more helpful for them to try and help by complimenting my accomplishments rather than criticising my choices, and that I can do enough of that myself. It is difficult because it is your mother and you do know that she is trying to help, but you do need to say something. Good luck!
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| I would tell her that you are working on it and doing the best you can with your situation right now. Tell her that it doesn't help when she bothers you about it, and that you know she is concerned, but she's not helping. Let her know that you are happy she lost the weight, but different things work for different people! :)
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MILLFULLER
3/23/07 4:47 P
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| How can I tell my mother that her constant attempts to bug me about my weight and telling me how she lost weight is de-motivating. My mother did not lose weight until she retired. I am working!
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