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I am sorry you are going through this.
But, you are going to have to do what is best for your little family. If you and your husband are in agreement with moving in with his mother, then that is what you should do.
Not like you cannot visit your grandmother at times.
I am sure if you asked your grandma, she would be for you making a better life for your child, which at this time might entail moving away.
Best of luck to you
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SAMANTHAKNY
2/13/07 3:18 P
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| I am going through a similar situation. My hubby, daughter, and I are moving south in a coupple months now, cost of living where we are is insane and we just want more in life. My family has been giving me grief about it left and right (but not quite as tough as yours). Im really guilty about the stain that it puts on our families, but I have told them that we are responsible for the best intrest of OUR family and although it is a difficult desicion it is the best one at the time and it is worth a big shot. You arent leaving THEM, you are starting yourself. Its hard to give advice on a subject that is quite similar to my own, but I hope that it was atleast a little helpful, GOOD LUCK!
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MOM2BOYS1975
2/13/07 2:58 P
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That is tough, as family situations can be.
One of the worst things in life is regret with things you can't change. You have 2 possibilities, you could possibly regret not being there in your grandmother's final days. OR you might regret not moving to get the financial assistence you need sooner rather than later.
I have two children and I would think of their well being first. If I felt they would be harmed in some way by our financial situation I would apologize to my family but tell them my child comes first and that we really needed the help.
If I felt the finances could hold out for a bit longer and my grandma was very close to death I'd probably hold out just a bit longer to be there with her and for my family.
This really is a matter where you need to weigh the pros and cons of each decision for your personal situation.
My experience:
I do regret not going to see my grandma when she was on her death-bed. She was 2 states away and my son was 18 months old. She was in a hospice and I didn't see how I could do it with such a young child (my husband was unable to care for him because of work). Now if it was the grandmother the other side of my family who was downright mean at times while I was growing up, I'd give my regrets and be on my way.
Good Luck with your decision.
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| I know how frustrating it can be to be pulled in so many different directions! Seems like as soon as we have kids suddenly we're open for the "well I haven't seen the baby in sooo long" guilt trips others like it. Do what you need to do for YOUR family. The three of you are the most important, and the rest of your family will eventually learn to accept that. Good luck!
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I am a married 24 yr old woman with a 18 month old daughter. Me and my hubby are poor! His mom lives in another state. We are thinking about moving down there and living with her so we can both get jobs and save money. She made the offer and we feel like we are never gonna get ahead unless we do this. She has a 5 bedroom home by herself so we will have plenty of room. When I told my mom it was crazy she put the biggest guilt trip on me. My grandma has a brain tumor and they are using that and my daughter against me. She even called me and said can you wait till your grandma is dead.! I don't know what to do because I do love them but, I know that my hubby and my daughter are my family and we are responsible for her well being.
Sorry about venting but, I sure needed It!
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