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SPLATMAN
10/30/07 12:17 P
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Thanks, MisterK!
How you doing, by the by?
Are we going to have to talk about that ticker of yours? '-)
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MRKATELYNN
10/29/07 8:40 P
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| I have not heard from him
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SPLATMAN
10/28/07 10:33 P
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For those who were on the thread "On Being a Man" - where the heck has it gone?!?! And even more important, anyone hear anything from SlyDoc in a while?
Seems strange that I can't find the thread or anything posted by SlyDoc in any search. His web page is still up but even others from his various teams are wondering where he's at.
Anyone know anything about our bud?
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Godd to see you back in action, Mister!
I see your ticker is moving to the right - great job!
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MRKATELYNN
10/6/07 9:42 A
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hey peoples I'm still here just took my computer back for a little while
Lynn
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| Empty....as in a blank chamber!
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| hahahahaha splatman. i guess it would be an empty threat for you then wouldnt it lol.
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| I *do* like that line and *could* use it before 1995 but I went to the vet and got tutored so the second part of the threat is pretty much moot for me.....
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KATELYNN2000
8/10/07 6:07 P
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| Yeah, I've used that Bill Cosby threat a time or two myself!!!
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KATELYNN2000
8/10/07 6:06 P
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Russ you know theydo that on purpose!! They're TRYING to drive us crazy! Our parents put them up to it!!!! LOL!!!
ZAXDAD, you'd be surprised how good you'll be at it!! You learn just as much as the kids do while they're growing up, so you'll be just fine! You'll be ready when you need to be!! The hard part is getting ready to send one out into the world!! I don't want to let go yet!!
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ya know Splatman, I'm 35, and my mother still uses that threat on me!
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Bill Cosby once said: "I brought you in to this world and I can take you out and then make another one who looks just like you".
Classic....
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| Reading this thread makes me wonder how I will be when my 1 year old gets old enough to do those things I fear. I hope I am patient enough to handle it all
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Vic
With kids, it's funny how of all the things you you tell your kids, they choose to act on "That one" absolutely wrong thing you tell them to do.
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KATELYNN2000
8/10/07 1:50 P
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OH, my kids learned the hard way NOT to do that!!! Mom goes ballistic!!! I really can't complain! If they all turn out as good as my oldest one has, then all the attitude and mouthiness will have been worth it!!! He gave us LOTS of trouble when he was Annie's age, I mean to the point of thinking he was gonna jump up in my face and scare me into doing what he wanted!! Well, not only did he find out that Lynn WOULD jump in the middle of that, but also that Mom wasn't afraid of him!! And mom can still take him down too!!! Anyway, he's 17 now, works a full time job, has just started his senior year (we homeschool) and he's turned out to be very responsible and a lot of help with the younger kids! He's also planning to join the Navy! Wants to be a SEAL!!!
So I'm hoping little Miss mouth will turn out as good he has!
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I think the worst is when you say something sarcasticly and they take it literally and do it. I remember my son begging me to ride his bike on the road. He wouldnt let up. He nagged me all day. He was on me about little things and i finally had enough and said " do whatever you want, just get off my case". The little bugger jumped right on his bike and headed for the road. I about crapped. When i hauled his rear into the house i asked him what he thought he was doing. He looked me right in the eyes and said " you told me to do whatever i wanted so thats what im doing. I want to ride my bike on the road". What do you say to that? I did say it but didnt mean it that way lol. Ughhhhhhh , kids.
And yes Russ ... Every parent gives their children the CURSE!
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| My wife keeps here cool until I loose mine then it is all in after that
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KATELYNN2000
8/9/07 9:02 P
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| OH NO!! OH NO!! How about when they REPEAT BACK what you told them to do and STILL screw it up!!! LOL!! It's the joy of grandparenting I'm told, to watch them suffer the same things they put us through!!! My dad will sit there and laugh while my daughter mouths off at me. Of course, he gets on to here after, but he claims I was just like that!! WHO ME??? I don't think so!! I don't have a big mouth like that! I'm quiet and sweet!! Just ask my husband!!!!! LOL!
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| While I don't want my son to have kids for a while (years from now) I can't wait to see how he deals with kids that mess up his house and then look at him, listen to him explain what he wants done, nod and go on about their business. When that happens, I hope I have my video camera.
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It's tradition! You **HAVE** to put the curse on them.
My 19 year old is finding out that the curse actually works - and sometimes all I can do is to leave the room and laugh my butt off!!
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| OK, do all parents give this curse to their kids: I hope you have a child just like you? I look at my kids and just cringe somedays.
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| HAHAHA , sounds exactly like my daughter. Shes got the mouth of a 30yr old. We were arguing the other day and i brought up something from earlier that day and she said " dont you bring that garbage up to me". I couldnt believe it. I didnt know wether to slap her mouth or pick mine up off the floor lol. I keep telling her thats shes going to reap what she sows. Her girls are going to be worse then her at this age. And like you, im going to sit back and laugh. LOL.
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KATELYNN2000
8/9/07 1:14 P
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Unfortunately, I can do everything just like Lynn does and he'll drop 20 pounds to my 1. And he wonders why I get frustrated!! LOL!!
My daughter is 14! She's a good kid, all my kids are, but she's got a mouth on her that just won't quit!!! She'll stand there and scream and yell at her dad for being "unfair" before he even says anything, then when he DOES say something and she doesn't like it, she starts whining to me about how mean he is!! I told her I hope she has 4 daughters and they're all just like her!!!!! I'm gonna sit back and watch and laugh!!!!! 
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Motivation is definately the key. I was down in the dumps about my weight for a long time. Tried all kinds of crazy diets but never stuck to them long. I never really realized how heavy i had gotten until i saw myself on a home video. I was absolutely disgusted. That is when i decided to do something about it. Now, when i lose my motivation i turn that video back on and it all comes back. I will NEVER be that heavy again.
Katelynn, i have a 13 yr old daughter and militay school is looking pretty good right now lol. She is a handful. I couldnt imagine having 2 girls. Kudoo's to you splatman for surviving that lol.
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| AMEN! Splatman you hit the nail on the head...motivation! My two little ones (5yrs and 9mos) are my motivators. fortunately I dont have to worry about going grey...my hair line left me years ago. now to get the wife to join...in her own sweet time.
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KATELYNN2000
8/8/07 9:16 P
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| Yeah, I'm come from a bunch of heavyweights myself!! I'm determined to NOT get that big EVER! and hopefully lose more of it!!
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i'M UNDERSTAND SPLATMAN
i HAVE NEVER BEEN IN THE military Ihave strugled with weight problems all my young life
Watch me dad die at 63 with diabetis and decided It would not happen to me and thanks to my wife Katelynn I have lost 20 pounds still have so to go but I feel good
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Thus the silver hair - it didn't even go gray first - just went to the exact opposite of my natural color. Forget about that hair dye for men garbage.... I threatened military school to both of my chicks and it just rolled right off of them. They're doing as well as could be expected but they're old enough to make their own decisions and live with what comes of them. I guess my military training shows through, eh?
I, too, was in GREAT shape after basic in 1980 but I was also 157 pounds, 18 and had the bull by the horns. I ballooned up to 230 at one time and worked down a bit to around 215 and just got PO'd at myself and decided I didn't want to be a flabby old wrinkly grandpa and I wanted to look good and lose weight for me and no one else - since, well, I'm 46, 3 grandkids and can't run so I can't chase the ladies any more...
The men in my family have always had weight problems and I just didn't want to carry that tradition and that was motivation enough for me.
Unless you REALLY want me to put on my round brown and start barking!
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KATELYNN2000
8/8/07 5:42 P
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Vic, I totally agree! And I for one, don't seem to have any trouble keeping my man happy!! He ain't out looking, and he still likes to cuddle, even though I've gained a LOT since we met!!! At least there are some men who still look at the right things in a relationship!!! THank God for that!
TrailRyder, that's funny!! I'd certainly never try tp pick someone up at a dentists office!! LOL!! Good one!!!
AND THEN THERE'S SPLATMAN, who REEEAAALLLY needs to put some of us through the basic training kind of workout!! UGH, I was in such great shape when I came out of basic!! I had a 25 inch waist and could hike up in the high parts of the Rocky Mountains for HOURS with absolutely no trouble breathing!!! THEN I HAD kids AND GOT OLD!! LOL!!
How did you survive two daughters???? We've only got one and I think Lynn's gonna end up putting her in military school or something, if she doesn't drive him crazy first!! LOL!! I'm not sure we could handle TWO!!! SHe's more trouble than all three boys put together!!!
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Hi - I'm Splatman. THE Splatman. I'm caucasian, 166 pounds, 6'2" and in dern good shape. Brown eyes, used to have jet black hair but 2 daughters [and now 3 granddaughters] have given me plenty of silver to highlight all that original color. I have 12 years active Army and 15 years Army Reserve service and still going strong. I'm educated - working on my Masters in Information Technology. I like dogs over cats, beer over wine, steak over chicken, I like riding motorcycles, love going to live rock and roll shows and sipping high-end tequila. I'm 46. Oh ya - and single.
Now that we have *THAT* out of the way... 
And doing fine, thank you for asking!
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| LOL @ going to the dentist to pick up chics in the waiting room. Thats a good one trailryder. But so true isnt it. Like i said, if ppl are here to hook up they need to find a chatroom.
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TRAILRYDER444
8/8/07 10:14 A
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| You know folks when I joined this site which was recently however, it was certainly not to meet anyone from a romantic standpoint. In fact that was the fartherest thing from my mind. Thats like making an appointment with your dentist to pick up chics in the waiting room,,,And then to assume somone wouldn't be interested in someone becuase they weigh such and such amount is crazy. Yes, there are certain people that are so shallow they are only interested in people that fit a certain mold. But we should read the book and not just the cover. I thought this site was about, nutrition, weight loss, weight gain, motivation, fitness etc.
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| Well put katelynn! The comment made about most women being 260 pounds really set me off. How dare anyone judge someone at that weight. Who is he to say we would not be a threat to anyones man. First of all, what women would ever give her husband/bf permission to flirt. Second of all, it takes a woman with no self esteem and self worth to flirt back with a married/taken man. Just because we are overweight, does not mean we dont have feelings. We are all here for the same reason. We should be concentrating on that and supporting eachother. Not thinking about who would be less of a threat to our spouses to talk to. If someone is here for that reason (to flirt ect), then they are on the wrong site and maybe should find a chat room. It irritates the heck out of me that such a shallow comment was made on such a wonderful site. Some ppl just dont think before they speak.
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KATELYNN2000
8/7/07 9:16 P
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Okay, first of all, SMARTY PANTS LYNN,don't be raggin' on my cokes when you're wolfing down double cheesburgers for supper and going back to refill your 44 ounce cup!!!
Second, Hi Russ and Splatman, how y'all doing??
Lynn showed me this thread! He was a little perturbed about the comment about "most of the women being over 260" and about the "flirting" part!! NO, we're not all that big!! And even if we were ALL that big, so what, we can still flirt---which my husband DOES NOT have permission to do and I would hope we were ALL mature enough here to remember that most of us are married and should repsect each other better than that!!
Now, let me add my two sense about getting the guy started!! Lynn was really reluctant to get on here at first, but after "meeting" some of the guys and being encouraged by them, it made a big difference! I really wanted him to lose weight because he's hypoglycemic and I wanted him to stay healthy and stick around for a while!! We lost his dad at 62 because of diabetes and I don't want that to happen to Lynn, so I really pushed him to lose weight and take better care of himself, but nothing worked until he got involved with these men! Russ was one of the guys who helped him get started!! THANK YOU!! Now, between the help he gets here, and at home, and with all the walking he does at his new job, he's not only losing weight, but he's also sleeping better and feeling better in general!!
So really, I'd say that's the best thing! Men need to be encouraged by other men! Most of them will never admit that, but it's true! Sometimes people tend to think they're the only ones going through this and think if they ask for help, it makes them look bad!! Here, we're able to see that we're NOT alone and it does help!!! Well, it helps the ones who've given up the cokes anyone!! LOL! But in all fairness, I've lost 20 pounds since I started spark, just haven't lost any in a while!!!
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vic and russ I totaly agree with both of you I do think if you get him to look at it and start talking to some of us he mite start slow but I think he will come around
Lynn
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| Most women won't send their guys out with permission to flirt carte blanche on any web site. That's just asking for a divorce
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| Kintla- its pretty bold of you to say that most women here are over 260 lbs and would not be a threat for her boyfriend to talk to or "flirt" with. Weight has nothing to do with it. He could talk or flirt with a 260 lbs woman and develop a personal bond with her just as easily as with a 120 pound woman. I know some women who weigh over 200 pounds that have more self esteem then some skinny little 120 pound woman. Urging him here with such a comment is just low and wrong. Urge him here for the right reasons, not immature ones.
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| Point him this way - we'll get him going!
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| My wife told me about this and just let me explore it on my own. That has helped me a lot since it was my choice to do it.
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Get him on here and bribe him somehow to just track what he eats and his weight and fill out all the stuff on here ... SP is highly motivational and interesting.
And if bribery doesn't work... just tell him "there is a lot of women on sparkpeople that I don't mind you talking to/flirting with" LOL and he will come a-running (and you won't have any fears about him flirting with women on here because most are over 260lbs! ;) )
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me to I tryed to loose but I was not in to it my wife got me in to spark then I started a new careuar and the weight just melted off I think it was the enviroment I was around
Lynn
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| We al have our own motivations to get fit again, yes? Mine was my doctor - I have the same cholesterol problem - but also I was just flat out sick and tired of being fat and flabby. I was fed up with myself more than anything else and knew I had to do something soon. My GF was already on SP and she showed it to me and left it at that and now I've surpassed her!
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SHADOGLARE
8/6/07 12:17 P
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Yeah, I have to admit I've been thinking about doing this for years, and what finally kicked me in the butt was my doctor telling me I needed to get in shape unless I was interested in having a heart attack later (dangerously high cholesterol).
However, at the same time, if any of the girls I'd dated during these times asked me to join them in regular walks, outdoor games, etc I'm sure I would have gone along with it - certainly wouldn't hurt to ask (plus I recently started dating a girl who's much more health-concious than others I've dated and I've found having each other around just to talk to each other about it has helped with motivation).
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Decide, commit, succeed.
Journey of a thousand miles starting with one step and all that, ya know.
On the ohter hand, you can take a horse to water but can't drown it.
Do what you do for YOU by doing the right things, state your case and concerns and let the decision be made by the one who needs to make it.
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MRKATELYNN
8/4/07 10:31 A
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no my name I'm in agreement with russ and splatman i'm loosing but my wife is not it's all in want to
my wife says she is trying but there is a 12 pack of cokes in the frige at all times
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MRKATELYNN
8/4/07 10:26 A
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| "To everything there is a season." Turn Turn Turn...I know i needed the kick in the butt to get started. My wife is now tagging along on this journey too, because she sees that it is working for me. everyone has hit the mark with your question, he hast to want to lose the weight. Be honest, let him know you are worried, and let him know you support him. Our egos are kinda fragile at times but he needs to know you care.
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| Vic is right. You can't pressure him into doing it.
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Have your hubby come on in or find a good board in the other areas of the guy's lounge. Nothing matters a hoot except that he's made the decision and wants to help himself and he'll find support or some motivation around these areas, to be sure! Oh ya - good job on getting him interested and moving.
Welcome and bring your other half next time!
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Hello everyone,
I was bored and wandered through your manspace and found this thread. My husband is over weight and wants to lose weight but wont do anything about it. I have listened to him whine about his weight and complain about how his clothes fit for years. Every suggestion i make goes unnoticed or is unwanted. So i stopped making suggestions and started making changes. First, i started cooking healthier meals, not only for him, but for myself as well. I cook with recipes from the spark website. He doesnt even know hes eating healthier. I stopped buying junk when i went grocery shopping, healthy food only. If he wants the junk, he has to go get it himself. I will not contribute to it. More times then not he goes without or grabs something else. I started changing myself and stopped worrying about changing him. In time, he noticed the weight coming off and started asking questions. It was then i knew he was ready. He is now on the spark website and losing weight along side of me. My advice to you is dont push or pressure him, he will shut you out. Change things you have control of like i did, he will come around. Good luck.
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Ronin was right on target and couldn't have said it any better.
Set the example, serve the right foods, do your workouts and when he sees soem progress, he'll just might want to get up and get moving!
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| You can't push him any faster than he wants to go. Encourage him to do what he will do. Positive feedback will make him want to do more.
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wow! thanks guy! i really appreicate the advice, i think the main problem is his not ready to start yet. he wants to lose weight but isn't ready for it yet. im gonna try the doctor thing and sit him down and talk :)
thanks again!!
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| Some of the stuff that has helped me was to weight train, martial arts, and the outdoors activities such as hiking, walking, biking, and a new job with more physical work. They all fit in with manly guy stuff, but more importantly were FUN. Is there physical activities that BF enjoys that you can do more of, learn to be better at, maybe get lessons for? Build on the fun and the rest can fall into place. One of the causes of depression is inactivity.
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LOBO1978_2000
7/23/07 12:54 P
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| I can relate to what your boyfriend is going though. I use to play football in high school as well and I was in really good shape. It was not till after I stop playing and going to college that I gained a lot of weight. I reached about 310 lbs before my last doctor visit and found that I could be diabetic. I think what really motivated me was what my doctor told me. Maybe you can tell your boyfriend the same thing. He told me that it's like playing russian roulette with your life. Each bullet is a factor for heart diease, and your job is to remove as many bullets as possible. Be honest with him and tell him that you want him around for a long time. My wife and son are my motiviation since I want to spend as much time with them as I can. Good luck.
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BEARINGTONBEAR
7/22/07 1:07 P
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| He has to be ready. Many people have the desire to lose weight, but they won't do it until they are ready to do it. And you will know when he's truly ready because he will seek the information out on his own. And if you have a good relationship, you'll be the first person he turns to for support. The best thing you can do right now is to set a good example, without pressuring him.
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Also ...
You want to take the time to understand where HE is with the whole issue. He is the way he is, and is doing what he is doing for his own reasons. The more you can understand what he is going through personally, the more you can understand ways to help support him.
Remember: You can't want something for someone that they don't want for themselves.
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You have to be honest with him. Let him know you are worried about his health, and depression. They do go hand in hand.
Do you cook meals? If so, have you started by trying to give him healthier meals, or cooking together to show him that healthy meals don't have to be boring and tasteless?
You could also suggest some activities for you both to go do, like take a walk in the park, go for a bike ride, anything to get out and moving.
Mainly, you have to sit down and talk to him, and explain things like you just did here, so he knows you are not "turned off", just worried about him, and want him to be around for the rest of your time together.
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| I don’t mean to intrude on the man space here, but I am in need of ur manly knowledge of being…um manly men..? k! so I have my wonderfully fluffy BF who doesn’t want to be fluffy anymore. He complains about being heavy all the time and he’s obviously very self-conscious (he does that pull my shirt our of my rolls things) and depressed just overall about the situation. He’s a big guy in general and when we were in high school be played football and baseball and weighed about 200-205, he wasn’t skinny but he was really healthy at that point. That was like 5 or 6 years ago and he’s like 260 and counting!! I guess my question is how should I approach him. He asks for help but then when I offer suggestions he says no or ew or does something else silly and dumb like that, but im really concerned about him. He’s only 23 and he’s headed in a bad direction, I only want to help him cuz I luv him not cuz I think he’s ugly or gross or anything like that. How you I like to be approached in a similar situation? How would u feel if u gf, or wife was like “hey buddy, ur getting out of control!”? any suggestions guy?
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