  |
|
|
|
UPDATE:
Thanks fellas for your listening ears and great responses.
Back from funeral in Rhode Island. Went to casino for Steve's moms 75th birthday and had a good time. She is a sweet heart. Steve and his wife went their way and left us with his mom, but that's ok. We enjoyed being with her than them.
They went back to Oregon which Mel said good riddness. He doesn't know why he bothers with him.
Anyways, he has not talked to him since July 12th and all is good on our home front. He will call again when he needs something but my husband says he will proablly be busy. :)
Annette
|
|
|
|
i suspect your husband gets what he wants from this guy most of the time.i have two true friends(these are the ones that dont ask why they just bury he body)a bunch of casual friends that are for talking football with but i dont ask or want much more of.Some guys at work yo udrift towards at coffee break but dont see outside of work.
To bad he dosent have more usefull friends but this guy seems to fill a need.I would leave it alone unless your husband seeks further opinion from you.
|
|
|
|
Lazarus:
My husband and I hang out together all the time. Come this July 24th, we will have been married 35 yrs. Yay! He works the night shift. Owns his own business and I don't work because of health issues.
Steve is his only friend . We have known Steve for over 10yrs, then Cindy, his wife for 5yrs when they got married. Get along with her very well. He moved to Oregon from Washington state where we both lived.
They talk to each other via instant messenger, e-mail and telephone. Yes Mel needs to wise up and tell him. period. But I think he feels he needs that male companionship that only a guy can give. I think if he had some other friend, Steve would be gone like the wind.
But...all in all. I agree with you. Thanks for your male insight.
|
|
|
|
Just a question but do you and your husband hang out together a lot or occasionally because of your work schedules?
I have found out that I seem to hang out with my spouse more than my friends anyway. Your husband sounds like a nice man but probably needs to wise up a little. I once had a friend like that, he'd call me up and ask me to come get him because his car broke down, or he couldn't get to work. I finally told him that he needed to grow up, i'm not his daddy and I don't need a moocher. Well believe it or not after about a month or two he contacted me and his whole attitude had changed. He ever took me out to lunch and hes a cheap skate!!! lol.
|
|
CHRIS.CORRADO
7/8/06 6:34 P
|
|
|
|
| I'm probably more like Mel, most guys aren't that hung up on those types of things, I know I'm not - is Steve a crappy friend, yes, I'm not disputing that, but let Steve deal with it the way he wants to, that's what I would want anyway.
|
|
|
|
Your so sweet to say that. Now your the type of friend that my husband needs.
The only other person he has to talk to is my son-in-law. He is kinda like my husband. He kinda is a loner and doesn't like to make waves. I just wish he would just stand up more for himself and speak his mine but I know he won't. We have talked about this many,many times before.
Do you know he hasn't even called him at all since my husband told him last night? Oh yeah, Steve is up here from Oregon doing work. He is a carpenter. mel picked him up from the train station and will be bringing him back. He also has been bringing him all around town also. Is that a friend or what?
I say kick him to the curve! He says, Guys don't think like that and handle things that way. Urgh!!!!!
|
|
BILLBRADBURN
7/8/06 3:13 P
|
|
|
|
Hi
Your husband Mel sounds to me like the true definition of an ideal friend I would certainly appreciate knowing. I guess the point is he seems to be having this friendship and his good nature used by Steve very selfishly.
I take your view on this as an observer of this relationship. However as the "wife" you should tread cautiously. Do you have any other friends that could discuss this matter in a group or perhaps another male friend of your husband that could take him aside and give him a hint that his good intentions are just being used.
If he is upset that this "friend" could care less about his family's loss then maybe he is about to realize this himself. A gentle reminder that Steve let him down on this occasion from time to time may well dwell in Mel's mind until he comes to the conclusion that this man is just shallow. In addition this guy's reputation should be grounds for doubt in itself.
Hope it helps!
|
|
|
|
Hello:
Pardon the intrusion into your space but I really need help from a mans point of view. I will try to keep it short and to the point.
My name is Annette and my husbands name is mel. We both have a mutal friend that we have know for 10yrs or more. His name is Steve. Steve and Mel are very,very close. So Mel thinks. I don't think so.
Anyways, my husbands aunt died last night. We were very close to her. Mel called Steve because he needed someone to talk to besides me. he needed his buddy. But Steve couldn't give him the time of day. All he could say was, Oh sorry. Then went on talking about his day. This mad my husband very sad. And me furious.Mel chalked it up as this is just the way Steve is. I say this is not the way a friend is.
Mel has been there for Steve when his dad died of cancer, when he went thru a divorce, helped him moved from Washington to Oregon 3 times, let him borrow 2 thousands dollars when we could not afford it and we never got it back. Was there for him when he got re-married, helped settle fights between him and his new wife, bailed him out of jail 3 times, let him crash with us 5 times and the list goes on. And the list goes on and on and on.
My question; I want him to tell Steve that he hurt him and never seems to be there for him when he needs a friend. And kick his A@@ to the curb. Mel says guyts don't think and act like that. he's hurt but that's just the way it is.
I have alot of anger towards Steve now and don't want to see him ever again. What should be down?
I need a guys point of view. I will abide by whatever you guys say.
Thanks and so sorry so long.
Annette
|
|
