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JANICESKATES
11/28/06 8:33 P
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I was married in September and I was pretty easy on my bridesmaids, though the littlest comment would just leave me not want to talking to any one of them for a week. Thankfully, I had 6 total, so I was able to rotate through who I talked most to.
I'm currently maid of honor for two girls who were in my wedding - one in June and one undecided so far. I'm a wedding dress shop pro at this point...between me last year and my best friend now, I've done so much dress shopping! Most of the time I think it's fun, but sometimes I just get tired of weddings. I still have 60ish thank you notes to write for mine!
Give your friend a little time to pull herself together. I have no idea what she said, and I understand she hurt you a lot, but losing a parent is huge and takes a long time to recover from. I was subject to random and sometimes irrational breakdowns for about 15 months after my dad died. That's right - more than a year. I was a mess, especially in areas where I'd looked to my dad for support and guidance.
After a little while to cool down, she might want someone to talk to. You don't have to ask her back into your wedding, but she could use a friend who really knows her to help steady her. Think about it in a few weeks or a month.
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STILESMOMMY
11/28/06 9:49 A
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| Wow that does stink but it is her loss. She will realize what a dumb thing to fight about and then be sorry....
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*BUTTERCUP*
11/28/06 12:47 A
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It's nice to see that your relationships with the bride are still good. I am a bride, and I have been having trouble with my friend of 15years. She has now declined being my MOH and is not speaking to me over a misunderstanding. I have appologised twice (although I feel her reaction is really overblown) and have not gotten any response. I am hurt that she would assume the worst of me, having known me so well for so long. I know she is having a difficult time at the moment, and I understand, but she is taking this too far. I don't even know if she will ever speak to me again.
What happened was this, her father passed away 2 weeks ago, and I was very worried about her, especially since we live so far away that I couldn't be there to support her. I called her up and we spoke for 3 hours on the phone. She was doing reasonably well considering. Also she and her mother were arguing and complaining alot about eachother. They never get along even under the best circumstances.
Anyway, I got a call from the dress shop saying that her dress had arrived. I asked the lady to wait a week at least to give her a break. The dress has only been partically paid for and there are a lot of alterations to do, such as adding sleeves, etc. Anyway, the lady was understanding, but anxious to have a fitting.
I sent a group email to all the bridesmaids saying that when there were feeling up to it and not too busy, they might enjoy a nice girls day out together and go down to the shop. I was not pushy nor was I in a hurry to make them go. The other girls had not chosen their dresses, so they have to go soon, but my exMOH did not really need to go. I just thought that since she is having such a rough time at home, it might actually be a bit of a relief to get out and have the support of a group of friends. I worded the email carefully (or so I thought) so that there was no implied haste, nor any pushiness. I wanted to give her the option to join them if she liked, or not. I also didn't want to make her feel excluded my not including her in the group.
From there, she send me a very hurtful response, which she also felt it necessary to CC to all the other girls. I was very embarassed and seriously hurt, and still am. I have tried many times to appologise for seeming insensitive, but to no avail.
Anyway, I am resolved towards it now, and have replaced her with a good friend who is very excited and helpful. It is just such a shame to throw away a 15yr friendship over such a willful misunderstanding. She should know me better than to suppose I was undermining the seriousness of her situation or feelings.
Sorry for spewing my guts out here. There is no need to respond, I just had to get it off my shoulders.
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GREYFUZZY
11/25/06 6:10 P
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I am going to be getting married in August 2008, but first I will be a MOH in May 2007, and that's really the biggest motivation for my weight loss efforts... not only am I the only bridesmaid, but the dress we have chosen is a mermaid shape, so I need to have a waist to make it look great!
My bride is anything but a bridezilla... she and her fiance are two of the most low-key, laid-back people I know. The only 'problem' has been that she kept changing her mind about things at first... she's gone through at least 4 bouquet ideas and everything else has been changed (or deliberated over and almost changed!) at least once. I can't blame her, though; I'm sure I will be doing the same thing when the time comes!
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STILESMOMMY
11/22/06 12:28 P
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| Are you getting married or are you becoming a MOH? Renee
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STILESMOMMY
11/22/06 12:27 P
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| Um my bride is a bit of a bridezilla and she admitts it. We did alot of the planning already. She is a little indecisive and that is enough to drive me crazy. She changes her mind a 100 times a week. Other than that I love her to death and am honored to be the MOH.
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*BUTTERCUP*
11/21/06 4:56 A
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Maid of Honours,
I wanted to know how much work you are putting into the weddings your are in??? Is the bride too demanding, are you enjoying it? To what extent are you willing to help, what would you enjoy helping with, and what would be a burdon?
Just thought I'd ask.
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| Losing weight to be MOH in my sister's wedding the past January was a big source of inspiration for me. I have pics on my Sparks page.
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| Good on you for being so comitted to being a MOH... Good Luck and all the very best!
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PATTYA925
11/16/06 2:47 P
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| I also am the maid of honor in a October 2007 wedding. I just wanted to wish you the best at meeting your goals! :o) Stay motivated and positive and you'll see great results.
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STILESMOMMY
11/14/06 5:23 A
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| Thanks for all the support? How long has everyone been a member of Psark? I joined a week ago, and hace lost only two pounds. It was a rough first week but I am hoping it will get easier with time. Fingers crossed
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CASSAFRAS12
11/13/06 8:49 P
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| I'm gonna be the maid of honor in a wedding in June or August 2007. We havent picked out the dresses yet, but I'm regretting it!
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WALTHERCHIC
11/13/06 3:13 P
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| Go Renee Go! I used my BIL's wedding as motivation to loose weight after having DD. It was great motivation. DH was quite thrilled with how I looked too ;)
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MVALENTA
11/13/06 12:17 P
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| I know what you mean! Good luck with your goals! Definitely a good source of inspiration!
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STILESMOMMY
11/13/06 8:15 A
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| I amm the Maid of Honor in a October 2007 wedding, and that is one of the reasons I want to lose weigh. I have to buy this gorgeous dress and I want to do it justice. I want to knock the socks off of my husband whom has never seen me thin. Renee
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