I agree with you about keeping busy being harder than one thinks and true enough at the end of the day you are still alone and even things like going out to eat or to a movie alone is not an easy adjustment for a new divorcee.
DIANA2 4/3/06 6:48 A
Hi, Dusty!
This is Diana, thank you for the email. I am trying to just take one day at a time. I love my Cat, her name is Nilsa, I named her after my pretty sister who passed away at the age of 35. The weather here in Poughkeepsie NY was real nice. So how is the Diet going. I didn't do well yesterday, but today I will start Fresh. I just had Coffee this Morning. I hope to Exercise later. What is your Cat name? I better go! Have a nice day. I forget to say I seem to be having a problem locating the sites I joined could you help me with this. Thanks! Have a good day,again. Your Support Friend, Diana.
DUSTYROSE 3/26/06 4:12 P
Hi there, I am new also, am 51 and no kids. I do have one cat. I wanted to tell you not to feel alone. There are lots of people like you and me. I know a bunch. I live near Los Angeles. I think that there are more single people near large cities because it is more socially acceptable than in rural areas. I wanted to relate something interesting that just happened to me. Within the past 6 weeks, several of my friends and family members told me of really serious problems in their marriages. They all said the same thing to me: "you are so lucky you are single!" I don't want to disparage the institution of marriage. But just realize that there are always two sides to every issue. You have freedom and choice in your life. Some of my married friends are supporting men who won't even look for a job or who are "under"-employed and the women are stuck in the marriage because of their kids. And just because a person has a child, that is no guarantee that the child will support you in your old age, or even come to visit you in a nursing home! I knew an older lady several years ago, who had one son. The son wouldn't work and relied on his mother to take care of him. At the time I knew them, the mother was about 75 and the son was about 55. He saw himself as a vitim, and watched TV all day. the mother cooked for him and did his laundry! They lived in seperate apartments in the same apartment building. So you see, there are no guarantees. Sorry, didn't mean to ramble on so long . . . Be happy with the life you have now . . . enjoy your kitties and your friends . . . I also agree with the comments made by others on this site . . . best of luck to you and all of us! - Dusty
DIANA2 3/23/06 6:21 P
Hi,Gailuvscats!
My Name is Diana and I understand what you are feeling, I am divorced and moved in with my fiance who put me threw hard times and sometimes I wish I had money and I would leave and make a life for myself, but then I get nerves and say to myself it could be worse, I guess that is not a good way of thinking. I am Engage now for almost 6 years, pretty sad I say, I don't feel secure and I hope I am not wasting my Life. I don't have too many friends or family near me. Sometimes I wish I could meet someone else and find true Happiness. I wish you the best! I am here if you need to talk. Enjoy your Day, Diana.
AUNT_BEE_1945 3/23/06 5:39 P
My heart goes out to you! You were given good advice. Got to keep busy, that is harder than one thinks. You are still alone when it come's to going to bed..eating alone, so on.
God Bless You! Give you what every your heart needs. Aunt Bee
GAILUVSCATS 3/23/06 12:35 P
Thank you both. I don't want ot give the wrong impression, I have friends and I have cats, and i work, but as a single, childless 57 year old, I know I am in the minority, and society does not acknowledge our existance, except to offer singles organization for the sole purpose of finding a mate. Never just to find friends. The belief is, it is unfortunate for you that you ended up this way, try to remin anonymous. I know there must be plenty of people in the same situation,but the stigma encourages them to isolate. Everything is for two, nothing is intentionally for one. I would like to see a big network of singles only.
HIGHNOON 3/23/06 11:48 A
Hi Gail, the problem you have just outlined does not get any attention, I had never thought about it before. I hope you get people that are in the same position, as they are the ones who can truly understand what you must be going through. The rest of us have different amounts of support and sure would like to offer to help out if we could.
RSTINEJR 3/23/06 11:34 A
If you don't get any takers, don't be reluctant to ask for any support you need from those of us with partners and kids.
To keep connected, I'd recommend volunteer work, getting involved in a church, and getting a pet.
Good luck,
Bob
GAILUVSCATS 3/23/06 10:45 A
How many of you are single without children? I really think there should be a support group for single/divorced people that do not have children/grandchildren. I think this group is really alone, even if you have extended family of siblings with children. We are viewed as sad, and ignored in most aspects of living. At this age you are supposed to be connected to someone. It is scary too, when you think about your old age. I won't have anyone to look out for me if I should end up in a nursing home, or very old and helpless at home alone.
what are your thoughts? Want to start a support group?
